To think it's really hard to find a FWB?

[OttilieStonelady]

I'm a single mum, work full time but from home so am free day times. Fairly attractive. I've tried tinder but nothing, and I have no idea where to look! I share a house so would need someone with their own place. Honestly, I don't want a relationship but am missing sex a lot. How do I go about this? Help me Mumsnet!!

I also need to be pretty discrete and not sure how to go about this.

A few years ago I found that very easy to come by on tinder and plenty of fish, what’s been your trouble?

With dating apps it couldn’t be easier!

I thought a fwb was an actual friend you shagged not some random from the internet.

@Scarlettpixie

I thought a fwb was an actual friend you shagged not some random from the internet.

I think it's just someone you sleep with regularly but aren't in a relationship with.

Maybe a swinging site?

I would agree. It’s not really safe to sleep with just any old stranger off a dating app. And what about STDs?

I think maybe you have to make friends with a single man (somebody at work? friend of a friend?) definitely just friends first to make sure he’s nice, then get very drunk one night and suggest DTD. If he says no blame being drunk. If he says yes - he’s now a FWB!

*disclaimer I have never done this.

My advice would be to look for a guy a bit younger.

They are literally every where, especially on dating apps, and wouldn't belive their luck at an older woman just wanting to use them for a shag. Be upfront and tell them it's completely in your terms, not many will refuse.

It’s not hard at all! Much easier for women than men. Just don’t fall for them!!

Much easier to find a FWB than a relationship! Most men will be jumping for joy at no strings sex! Are you seriously saying it’s hard 😕

IME it’s difficult to get a regular one as opposed to a one-off maybe I’m a crap shag but apps were my go-to. And younger guys, as @DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult suggests. I was early thirties the last time I was looking for this kind of thing, and 25-26 year olds were the best. Grown-ups with no baggage or drama.

Fabswingers is your friend. Don’t be fooled by the ‘swinging’ bit, most people on there are looking for one on one casual arrangements.

Fabswingers but be warned a lot of them will be married. Most are upfront about this but some lie shamefacedly. (They're mostly not interested in swinging so don't let that put you off)

@Scarlettpixie

I thought a fwb was an actual friend you shagged not some random from the internet.

This is exactly the definition! A FWB is an actual friend, because that means respect and caring on some level from both sides (& familiarity) who you then have some good times with as if you were a couple - that means the benefits (sex or a movie or both or whatever) - but without the responsibility or hassle of an actual relationship. I had a couple of wonderful FWB's in my uni days

Don't confuse it with the very grim f##k buddies (FB) concept which is the random off the internet for a shag scenario.

@PumpkinKlNG

Much easier to find a FWB than a relationship! Most men will be jumping for joy at no strings sex! Are you seriously saying it’s hard 😕

It's hard to get a FWB, nigh impossible, because you'll end up with a FB which is far inferior and probably not very satisfying!

I don’t think it’s impossible I imagine most men will be jumping for joy at regular sex without a relationship

I never really saw the benefit of a FWB, I mean if I wanted to shag the same man over and over again I'd have a relationship.

I tend to just shag them 3 or 4 times or until they bore me, and then move on to the next. Tinder is definitely the place to go and pick lads in their 26-30 age bracket.

I'm 31 a lone parent. I also don't ever want another relationship.