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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Presenting at work

43 replies

RainbowBriteUk · 30/08/2021 17:17

Does anyone else have this irrational fear of presenting?

I'm good at my job but when it comes to presenting I get this all consuming fear. Tomorrow I have to present for around 2 hours and all I've thought about all weekend is that.

I really hoped I would come down with something or even something happen and I die before I have to go to work tomorrow (it's that bad). I hate this part of my job.

OP posts:

Lagirl20 · 30/08/2021 17:26

This won’t be of much help to you tomorrow (sorry!) but look for a local Toastmasters club. They’re fantastic for practicing public speaking and presenting and improving and getting feedback in a supportive space

Rocktheboat87 · 30/08/2021 17:40

I don't think many if anyone likes it, I get the same anxiety I do before an interview, or meeting strangers. Once you're actually doing it you probably won't care. I guess a good way to to help yourself is to have things with-in the presentation which distract from you talking. Whether that's graphics, a joke or a picture.

Shelddd · 30/08/2021 17:41

I use to be like that too but I did a post graduate degree where I had to do like 50+ presentations and had a short 3 day course on it... that was enough to make me really comfortable. Now I am happy to present.

It's interesting though because I had presented at my job like hundreds of time before my post graduate degree... so it's not like it was something I didn't have enough exposure to but I think doing it in a safe academic setting helped me out with trying a few techniques out and then the course helped a bit too.

I'm personally not a fan of toastmasters if you need to present for work because its not really geared towards professional presentations, it's very mechanical and inauthentic and dramatized and you will not connect with your audience in a professional and authentic way like you need to when doing a pitch or even training session at work.

FlorallyBankrupt · 30/08/2021 17:53

I used to dread and hate it too, think I posted on here about it a couple of years back (different name).

I still hate it but I found the way to get through is to practice, practice, practice - don't just have a look through the slides, actually stand up and walk around and say out loud what you're going to say. Even if you simply practice an opening statement for each slide.

That saves the dreadful cold fear of firing up your presentation and going blank, or getting to a tricky slide and freezing up. Do it out loud, then go back to the beginning and do it again. Three times.

It won't make you like it any better, but it beats the gut-wrenching fear. Of course, the best thing for it is a nice beta-blocker, but you might not have access to that before tomorrow!

Good luck, get that practice in, avoid caffeine in the lead up and do some deep breathing. You'll nail it.

Francescaisstressed · 30/08/2021 17:57

What do you hate about it?
I had a terrible experience a couple of years into my career (shaky voice, hands) and was clearly visibly anxious. It was the first time it had struck me like that but made me terrified for any future public speaking. I started to use propranolol and it did me a world of good as got rid on the shaky hands, heart rate going up and trembling voice.
If it's less physical for you and more about presenting, I would suggest public speaking courses, some good companies can help you internally if you ask.

Sparklesocks · 30/08/2021 17:58

I think it’s a common anxiety. You’re very much on show aren’t you? It’s scary!
My only advice is that it seems to be easier the more you know your subject/presentation - because if you get lost/distracted you can easily pick up where you were and carry on. Practice is key.
And it’s such a relief when it’s all done.

AhNowTed · 30/08/2021 17:58

I'm the same OP.

It's like stage fright.

I'm really good at my job but my body just goes into hyper mode and I can't think, or see!

Two things make a massive difference.

Sitting down. It's a completely different scenario. I can do this in a boardroom type setting without too much difficulty.

Propranolol. The only way I can cope with a more formal setting, standing up, bigger crowd is to take these. They're non addictive and I know others with the same fears who take them as needed. They calm the heart rate and stop you panicking. Wish I'd discovered them years ago.

HTH.

nancybotwinbloom · 30/08/2021 18:03

I'm the same.

Two hours though? Half an hour in you will be in your stride, judged your audience and just wing it.

Soon it will be just another memory.

good luck, get your game face on and just imagine they are all naked. I read that helps.

DontBlameMe79 · 30/08/2021 18:05

I can second Propranalol/Inderal. While medication may seem like a negative thing to consider, they are non addictive and very safe. I do a lot of presentations and the anxiety was all consuming. Now I really enjoy them, and am calm before and during. Gave me my life back really. Only need to be taken about an hour before, not regularly. My GP was happy to prescribe them for this purpose.

Shelddd · 30/08/2021 18:07

And and it might sound obvious but I never use to do it!! but you absolutely need to practice your speech... and by practice it, I mean do an entire run through out loud... if you can do it in the same or a similar room that would help a lot.. you did say it was 2 hours though so not sure how practical that is.

Dogoodfeelgood · 30/08/2021 18:10

Beta blockers also saved my career! I’m not sure what id be doing without them, definitely in a role that avoided presentations anyway . Presenting is such a good skill to have and can really propel you, if you’re the “go to” person at work to present something. Your GP will prescribe them for public speaking anxiety. Non addictive and don’t make you feel at all different, they just stop the flight or fight Adrenalin rush during a presentation. I usually take one 45 mins before I need to speak.

nancybotwinbloom · 30/08/2021 18:12

Op you must be good at whatever it is you have to present or you wouldn't be up there.

You must know more about than anyone your presenting to.

Toomuchis · 30/08/2021 18:21

I both have the fear and am pretty good at public speaking (at least that's the feedback).

My techniques are:

Know your shit backwards. I have prolific notes on every slides that I never look at but I know they're they're if I need them. It's like a very wordy comfort blanket.

Stand up and practice. You'll feel like a right eejit but it works. It means you're never saying anything live for the first time.

The golden truth - no-one else knows what your were going to say so if you say something different/miss out a wee bit, it doesn't matter. They won't know any different.

Medicate if you have to, but give it a try by accepting that adrenaline is this thing that's making you judder/pee like a manequin. You can get rid of it by locking yourself in the big and jumping up and down/ hanging upside down and giving yourself a shoogle. Sounds crazy but it does work - the movement gives your body something to do with the adrenaline.

You know your stuff, and you're the expert on this stuff, right? So try to talk about it as you would of you were talking to friends or family about it - with enthusiasm and sounding like you - a lot of nerves come from trying to sound like someone else/whatever you're expected to be. The best feedback is when you get told that someone else really got it because you have it to them. That's you being you, not someone fake.

I hope some of that is helpful.

AhNowTed · 30/08/2021 18:21

@Dogoodfeelgood

Beta blockers also saved my career! I’m not sure what id be doing without them, definitely in a role that avoided presentations anyway

. Presenting is such a good skill to have and can really propel you, if you’re the “go to” person at work to present something. Your GP will prescribe them for public speaking anxiety. Non addictive and don’t make you feel at all different, they just stop the flight or fight Adrenalin rush during a presentation. I usually take one 45 mins before I need to speak.

Are you taking the bigger one that's the same as 4 small ones.. think it's 100mg?

I take 4 small ores an hour before.

GP has no problem prescribing them.. it's a very common problem.

millenialblush · 30/08/2021 18:24

Yes I hated it! Until I found propranolol. Absolutely a gamechanger for me, all nervous/anxious symptoms dissappear!

DontBlameMe79 · 30/08/2021 18:29

When I went to my GP to ask for a beta blocker (propranolol) prescription for speaking anxiety, after doing my own research on the net, I was expecting a lecture…you know, medication not being the answer, try CBT, don’t rely on drugs, don’t believe what you read on the internet. But he just said - “oh yes, I use them for that too, bloody brilliant”.
Like Dogood, they saved my career, no exaggeration. And I use them less and less as I know I have them if needed, which mitigates the problem in the first place.

FrankGrillosWrist · 30/08/2021 18:30

I used to be the same OP, I’d rather have gone to the electric chair than in that room. It’s not a bad thing to feel nervous, I know, the shaky hands, nodding dog head, & shaky voice. Try & begin with humor, if you can get them laughing it gives you a boost & off you go. I’ve seen the most confident (too confident) of people get up there & spout absolute nonsense because they seriously believe that they’re the dogs bollocks. In reality they have no idea, look foolish, & bore us all to death. We may be nervous, but we’ll try harder, learn our stuff, & do a far better presentation than those confident people.

DontBlameMe79 · 30/08/2021 18:42

@AhNowTed
I get the 40 MG tablets. A quarter of a tablet works fine for a lower stress talk. Half for the more stressy ones. If I preset at a big conference I take a whole tablet.

Peanutsandchilli · 30/08/2021 18:45

I hate it. I find that unless I know everything by heart, I clam up and my brain just doesn't seem to work. I avoid it at all costs.

Fwiw, I was put on Propranolol for a different medical condition. It made me hallucinate and I wouldn't recommend it.

AhNowTed · 30/08/2021 18:50

[quote DontBlameMe79]@AhNowTed
I get the 40 MG tablets. A quarter of a tablet works fine for a lower stress talk. Half for the more stressy ones. If I preset at a big conference I take a whole tablet.[/quote]

That's the one!

I've used them for other stuff as well.. wedding speech, friends eulogy.

I could have saved myself a careers worth of sheer panic and letting myself down if I'd discovered them earlier.

TalbotAMan · 30/08/2021 18:59

When I started a job as a postgraduate lecturer, I practised giving my lectures in an empty lecture theatre - script, slides, jokes, the works.

After a month or so I was fine going in cold.

whatthejiggeries · 30/08/2021 19:14

I'm like this too - I can't take beta blockers because of a heart condition so I am well and truly fucked

GinJeanie · 30/08/2021 19:30

Aww OP, you have my sympathy. It can be bloody terrifying! I bet you come over brilliantly when giving a presentation but obviously that's not why you posted - you don't enjoy doing it which is completely understandable.
I've done it a lot over the course of my teaching career. I was ok until about 20 years ago when I completely froze in front of a hall full of parents with SLT at the back. I managed to stutter my way through but it was an awful experience and I don't know what brought it on. I then avoided presenting for quite a few years although have always been confident in front of a load of kids. Jeez! I wish I'd known about propranolol.
I did a middle management course around 10 years ago with a module on presenting to an audience. This helped SO much and I've been ok since. Are there any courses you could do? Apologies if you've already been down this route...

SwedishEdith · 30/08/2021 19:47

OP - I don't think this is an irrational fear.

Teams has been a Godsend to me as I can just about manage to present like this. I've avoided so many jobs and opportunities in the past where being able to present was part of the job description. I am going to ask about beta blockers as I am absolutely dreading the return to the office and the expectation that I'll be fine with this. Glad to hear GPs are usually okay with this.

TooStressyTooMessy · 30/08/2021 19:55

I present all the time in my job. Lots of good advice above already. My top tips:-

Practise. Practise. Practise. Ideally in front of an audience.
Ideally if you have access to it be as sure as you can be that you know how any technology works: lights, slides, buttons etc. Especially important if presenting remotely.

Then my other two are only really if allowed / appropriate:-

Take a bottle of water in. Helps with the nervous dry throat. Leave the lid on though if your hands are shaky or have a non-leak one in case you knock it over.
Have some very basic notes with you if your mind goes blank. If I am nervous I often have potential answers to difficult questions and facts I absolutely must not forget. Sometimes I write down my opening sentence. Once I’ve said that I find I can get going.

Also even the most experienced presenters have bad days so try not to beat yourself up. Now I’ve given all those tips I’ll probably freeze myself next week at work. The tip is to be able to unfreeze yourself. Hopefully I can still do that too!

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