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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think Mumsnetters are an extraordinarily law abiding lot

59 replies

Houseofmirth66 · 29/08/2021 20:17

Just read another thread where OP was concerned she was about to be busted by the cops for opening a letter addressed to her actual house and came up with a list of things I’ve done I could actually have been arrested for. I’m not proud of them but I was a shoplifter as a teenager, have driven drunk (would never do it now) jumped into an idling lorry with a friend and drove it, committed a minor fraud…There were others but I am an extremely upstanding law abiding type in middle age and don’t think of myself as a wrong ‘un. Am I being unreasonable to assume that even mumsnetters must have had some brushes with criminality in their youth?

OP posts:
LaurieFairyCake · 30/08/2021 14:45

I've driven drunk dozens of times (lived in a village with no one around, nearest police station 20 miles away)

Tons of pubs, everyone did it.

(Is 30 years ago though)

I have also driven over the speed limit plenty of times (never in 20 or 30 limits)

Shoplifted loads as a kid (was neglected so shoplifted sanitary products)

Been in fights when a teenager so assaulted people - actually I've knocked two people unconscious (one was assaulting a woman in the street and I was sober, one was a family member trying to kill another family member - I was 8)

Fiddled taxes as a teenager - ie. was all cash in hand (had no idea taxation was even a thing when I was 12-18)

LaurieFairyCake · 30/08/2021 14:46

Oh god and I've done PLENTY of drugs

Shodan · 30/08/2021 14:56

No-one is blame-free.

It's just that other peoples crimes are always worse than your own.

And there are many odd laws that can be broken. For instance, did you know that it's illegal to be drunk in a pub?

It's also illegal to impersonate a police officer or soldier, even at fancy dress parties.

And to handle a salmon in suspicious circumstances.

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 30/08/2021 14:56

I have failed to use commas, and apostrophe's correctly but luckily no one noticed.

But I still feel uncomfortable in Church and worry that I may get identified from the Vicar during his sermon for these dreadful acts.

PepsiHoover · 30/08/2021 14:57

@TheQueef

I'm worse the older I get! I often muse that a six month prison sentence would be a lovely holiday, I should start a list of crimes to do. But that would just be another to do list Sad
You'd have to do some serious stuff to get six months in prison!

Shoplifting ain't gonna cut it!

TheQueef · 30/08/2021 14:57

I thought everyone had agreed not to mention the Salmon?

PepsiHoover · 30/08/2021 14:59

I still can't get over the thread the other day when a parent considered punishing their 17YO for drinking alcohol in the pub!

I was in the pub drinking from 16YO with my parents knowledge!

Yesitsbess · 30/08/2021 15:02

@Shodan I need to know more about the salmon...

Soubriquet · 30/08/2021 15:03

@PepsiHoover

I still can't get over the thread the other day when a parent considered punishing their 17YO for drinking alcohol in the pub!

I was in the pub drinking from 16YO with my parents knowledge!

Least you was in the pub

I have vivid memories of kids underage getting hammered near the local cemetery.

beastlyslumber · 30/08/2021 15:03

@ZednotZee

I think MN is largely comprised of middle class conformists, yes.
Yep.
beastlyslumber · 30/08/2021 15:04

*You'd have to do some serious stuff to get six months in prison!

Shoplifting ain't gonna cut it!*

Come to Scotland and say "Only women have vaginas!" Should work. (Only you might find yourself in prison with a male rapist, so probably not as relaxing as you imagine.)

LaurieFairyCake · 30/08/2021 15:05

More than 96% complied with all the Covid restrictions

We really are a very law abiding country

TheQueef · 30/08/2021 15:06

Tell me about it Pepsi I need a plan, I doubt I can smoke enough pot to get six months and I'm a total coward pacifist so it'll have to be some obscure, fish fondling related law that carries a fixed term custodial Grin

Yesitsbess · 30/08/2021 15:08

@TheQueef

Nick a Swan maybe?

PallasStrand · 30/08/2021 15:13

I those those hysterical posts about accidentally opening someone else’s post are actually more about the low-grade perma-anxiety Mn seems to attract. See also ‘The school run is a daily psychological gauntlet of cliques and side-eye’ and ‘A driver ahead of me accidentally hit a cat and just moved the body to the side of the road — am I a bad person for not spending a fortnight combing the city for its owners and paying for an elaborate funeral?’

PallasStrand · 30/08/2021 15:15

@ZednotZee

I think MN is largely comprised of middle class conformists, yes.
Lower-middle-class conformists, I’d have said. Obviously with outliers.
Shodan · 30/08/2021 15:29

@Yesitsbess I wish I could tell you more about the salmon, but as handling it is illegal and I'm very law-abiding, it's outside of my clean-living first-hand knowledge, I'm afraid.Grin

Yesitsbess · 30/08/2021 15:31

I will just have to handle salmon I'm a way that is clearly not suspicious I suppose. Matching hats?

zukiecat · 30/08/2021 15:38

I don't drink alcohol so never been drunk, or driven while drunk obvious!

Never taken any drugs except prescription ones.

Never stolen anything, the one time I found a jar of baby food in DD1's raincover on her pushchair I went back into the shop to pay for it.

WTFisNext · 30/08/2021 15:40

YABU to assume everyone has broken at least one law. YANBU to think a lot of people on here are as perfect as they make out.

I'm the fun police and abhor risk taking so I genuinely have never broken the law but apart from my mother who is commissioner of the fun police I couldn't confidently say I know other adults who have never broken a single law.

helentomelon · 30/08/2021 15:44

Yep I think Mners are goodie two shoes in general. It's the one line responses laying out laws and rules totally ignoring the nuances of the given situation that get me:

  • the age on consent is 16
  • class A drugs are illegal
  • that's stealing
  • the recommended units per week is 10

Blah blah blah

Crockof · 30/08/2021 15:49

@TheQueef

I'm worse the older I get! I often muse that a six month prison sentence would be a lovely holiday, I should start a list of crimes to do. But that would just be another to do list Sad
In a waiting room there was a readers digest, or similar magazine with short fictional stories, one was from a women who had been arrested for poisoning her MIL, it was so beautifully written it seemed that it was a deliberate act until the final paragraph where we find it was a complete accident but she is going to plead guilty as being in prison was such a beautiful rest. I was only a teenager but it stayed with me, now I know what she means.
TheQueef · 30/08/2021 16:01

Honestly Crock I fantasized about it, when DC were teenage especially.
Admittedly this was more a Cell Block H type scenario not a real scary prison fantasy.
More crafts and a bit of laundry than stabbing and people who shouldn't be locked up with women.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 30/08/2021 16:01

I've broken loads of Covid "laws".

Drank underage, had sex underage, smoked weed, stole pic n mix as a kid, not scanned a bag for life in Asda. Graffitied on a lamp post as a teen. Recently done some cash in hand work and not declared it.

lazylinguist · 30/08/2021 16:09

Yep, middle class conformist here. I've done a few questionable things when drunk. None of them illegal though. Never taken illegal drugs. Never even smoked a cigarette (not that they're illegal, obvs). I've broken the speed limit - that's about it. I'm very risk-averse and don't have a rebellious bone in my body tbh.

It's the one line responses laying out laws and rules totally ignoring the nuances of the given situation that get me.

Nuances don't change the law.

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