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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask for some support from anyone on here..

8 replies

HumDumMum · 28/08/2021 19:24

I could do with some support.

I feel like I’m close to some kind of breakdown. I’m 35 weeks pregnant - and have felt sick every day, all the way through. It’s been hell. I’ve cried most days. I had 4 days in hospital as I felt so sick I couldn’t eat or drink at one point.
Now I’m huge, feel uncomfortable all the time and just want my life and body back. I see people all over my newsfeed out enjoying their lives and it's like mine is on hold. I feel to big and uncomfortable to be walking far and too sick to be out of the house some days.

My relationship is going down the drain. He never asks how I am and doesn’t know if he wants us to be together. I have no job as I gave up work to be a stay at home mum. He never just gives me a cuddle or tries to talk to me. I think he just sees me as a burden and that I could just snap myself out of this.
If we split up I have nowhere of my own to live, no income and will soon have 2 kids.

I then found these lumps under my armpit so on top of everything else I’m terrified about cancer.

I’m scared of the labour coming up.

After losing my cousin last year aged 23 to a heart attack I’m terrified something else is going to happen to others I love, especially my dad who is 70 soon.

I feel like I just can’t cope anymore.

Any support, advice or anything would be so much appreciated x

OP posts:
whosaidtha · 28/08/2021 19:29

You need to speak to your midwife. Explain and maybe see about a plan for delivering the baby soon. Also a gp about the lumps. Hopefully once baby is born you'll feel a bit better and can start to deal with your relationship then. Good luck.

MyOtherProfile · 28/08/2021 19:31

You've got so much on your plate. Definitely start by talking to your MW. Hopefully she can help signpost you.

HerRoyalRisesAgain · 28/08/2021 19:31

Oh youre really having a rough time of it aren't you? Flowers
I've no advice, just a handhold and a listening ear. (Reading eye?)

Original poster
HumDumMum · 28/08/2021 19:33

I was referred to the perinatal mental health team when I was in hospital but they just advise I take antidepressants, which I don't want to as you have to stay in hospital after having the baby if you do and also I worry the side effects will make me feel even more sick. My midwife just said mental health isn't a clinical reason to deliver the baby early and being induced before my body is ready might make a labour that might not have been difficult if it was natural harder than it would've been if it was just spontaneous Sad

OP posts:
Original poster
HumDumMum · 28/08/2021 19:34

The lumps only came up midweek so I'm going to ring the doctor on Tuesday x

OP posts:
whosaidtha · 28/08/2021 23:28

Bullshit about mental health. A baby is considered full term at 37weeks. She's right about induction so I'd ask for a c-section in two weeks time. Your mental health is extremely important.

Anordinarymum · 28/08/2021 23:37

@HumDumMum

I could do with some support.

I feel like I’m close to some kind of breakdown. I’m 35 weeks pregnant - and have felt sick every day, all the way through. It’s been hell. I’ve cried most days. I had 4 days in hospital as I felt so sick I couldn’t eat or drink at one point.
Now I’m huge, feel uncomfortable all the time and just want my life and body back. I see people all over my newsfeed out enjoying their lives and it's like mine is on hold. I feel to big and uncomfortable to be walking far and too sick to be out of the house some days.

My relationship is going down the drain. He never asks how I am and doesn’t know if he wants us to be together. I have no job as I gave up work to be a stay at home mum. He never just gives me a cuddle or tries to talk to me. I think he just sees me as a burden and that I could just snap myself out of this.
If we split up I have nowhere of my own to live, no income and will soon have 2 kids.

I then found these lumps under my armpit so on top of everything else I’m terrified about cancer.

I’m scared of the labour coming up.

After losing my cousin last year aged 23 to a heart attack I’m terrified something else is going to happen to others I love, especially my dad who is 70 soon.

I feel like I just can’t cope anymore.

Any support, advice or anything would be so much appreciated x

You have a lot on your plate and you have let it build up so you have no control. Feeling sick when pregnant is horrible. I was very sick with all three of mine for the first sixteen weeks so I know what it is like. It drains you. The way you are feeling is affecting your relationship. He probably does not know what to do. When you are pregnant everything is magnified. You need some help. Try and talk to someone - your midwife or your doctor about how you are feeling. Get a handle on your life or it will spiral even more. Sort the lumps out. Get them looked at Be proactive.

On the upside - not long to go before baby is born and then no more sickness.

Original poster
HumDumMum · 29/08/2021 12:03

Thank you all x

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