Hoping for traffic - anti depressants & libido

[Ionlyhave2hands]

Hi

I posted this in the mental health section first but, being unable to wait for replies, I'll do it here too because this might be a thing that a lot of us have and you can help.

I'm 42, have not had any mental health issues at a point where I've need to ask for help before. I would have considered myself 'normal '.

I divorced my ex on account of finding out he was seeing prostitutes and shagging about generally.

This was early 2019. It was an enormous blow and so I went to the GP for help. Initially, I got diazepam for a week or 2.

After that, I have been through all the ssri's.

I tried sertroline to start with and had such bad diarrhea that I couldn't go to work. I tried it again a little while later but same thing.

I moved my life forward and have found a new man who I love which is amazing but I'm still v much on the edge and can't relax properly. With him, I'm fine sexually and can orgasm normally.

But I'm not ok still. I know I need something to calm my mood/anxiety/stress.

During my time with him, I've tried citrroplan and prozac. Each, within a week of taking them, I've been unable to really feel anything during sex, not least been able to orgasm. No chance.

So I stopped taking them both times.

I do still need something to calm me down. Wine & cigs is a route I take and they're really bad for my health. I'd like to find something that can help me without spoiling sex.

Has anyone found a different medication that doesn't affect libido/orgasms?

Thanks

Some libido can come back to some extent after a few months of being on them, when you get used to it the side effects become a bit less. Although it probably wouldn’t be to the extent you would hope for.

I’m very pro-SSRIs but are you sure this a medication thing? Not talking therapy? If this has all been triggered by previous experience with your unpleasant ex I’m wondering if counselling or some sort of psychotherapy would be better in this case?

They kill my libido stone dead and as I'm on them for life for my condition I choose to stay single. I don't have the energy tp pretend to want sex for a man.
You might want to try psychotherapy or something similar.

Prozac here. Definitely harder to orgasm but not impossible. I have a generally low libido anyway and I'm not with anyone currently so would be hard for me to comment on that.

Often you need to take them for a few weeks for side effects to reduce, you may not want to do this if it is having such an impact

They all kill ability to orgasm unfortunately. I've been on citalopram and venlafaxine - the latter for 2 years - and never changed.

It does look like you can't have your cake and eat it from what I've seen and what you say.

Huge shame because moving on and having a nice sex life is part of recovery of what I've been through, I think.

Maybe it's counselling I need instead.

Hi OP. I’ve been on all of those pills, all fairly long term. Each time it’s taken a while for libido to come through after initial adjustment to the drug. I remember with sertraline being particularly upset at feeling NOTHING because my relationship was my haven at that point. 2-3 months in it was much better. Stick with it? Overall this found the drugs to be worth it. It took time though.

Thanks for your comments. I've been prescribed Duloxetine which is an SNRI. Will post again in a few weeks so that anyone with an interest in this can use my experience in the future.

19 year old daughter has no libido on vortioxatine
Any help please