To use permanent hair removal on my 11 year old?

[FuzzyClutter]

My dd has VERY dark hair, and along with very hairy arms and legs, she has noticeable hair in other unwelcome places. Ever since she was tiny she’s had a few hairs under her chin, but now she’s going through puberty it’s spreading and getting longer, so she has quite a noticeable neck beard going on :( . She’s also got a dark moustache in the making.

She obviously feels very self conscious about this and is about to start secondary, I don’t want to give bullies any reason to pick on her. So I was thinking about getting an IPL machine like the Phillips lumea, as I think she’s going to battling with unwanted hair for many years to come and so would probably be a good investment. My understanding is that the hair grows back a lot slower and eventually doesn’t grow back at all, but I could be wrong about that?

I’ve no idea about this as not massively hairy myself so never had to think about it before. Would IPL be the best option for her or does anyone have any better suggestions?

I started waxing at 12 as had very dark leg hairs. Now in my 30s it takes ages for my hair to grow back (it only does in patches) and I can literally pull it out easily with my fingers. My mum's rule was I wasn't ever allowed to shave and I'm really glad I didn't as it has become a lot easier to manage.

I have pcos. I would get it checked out but don't pin hopes on 'levelling out' hormones reducing the hair. Mine never has got less even on the pill and losing 4 stone. I wish my mum had let me use ipl as a teenager!

I wouldn’t use a Lumea on my kids! It can be sharp enough on me

I’m like your daughter, (damn dark Mediterranean genes!), and I’d vote for Lumea or anything equivalent. I wish that was available back in my time. But I did had things lasered some years ago and it was the best thing I’ve ever done.
Threading, waxing etc are not permanent solutions, need redic upkeep and dealing with the ingrowing hair is damaging to the spirit and skin.
But if it’s excessive you might need to check for PCOS.

Thanks for the replies. I hadn’t thought of PCOS so I will speak to the GP and get her checked out. My gut feeling is it’s just her colouring, her father had dark Mediterranean skin and was pretty hairy and she obviously takes after him.

Bit of a concern that some posters have said IPL is pretty painful, not sure she’ll cope with that too well as she has ASD and sensory issues. But maybe the desire to not have hair on her face and chin will override that, she does get really upset about the hair. I remember when she was about 6 she was brushing her hair with the tangle teazer, and then she tilted her head up and started brushing her under chin hairs which was upsetting as I had never pointed them out to her and didn’t even think she was aware. I really feel for her, it’s not something me or her sister (different father) have to contend with but it’s going to be an ongoing problem for her. I can’t imagine she’s ever going to think ‘god, I really wish I’d never done away with my neck beard now’ when she’s older so starting to try and get on top of it now probably isn’t a bad idea.

do not do anything like that without asking a doctor's advice.

Good on you for being proactive. I went through agonies as a child with teasing for being hairy. My mother was clueless and kept banging on about once you start shaving you can't stop. I mean why would you stop? My mother didn't have the problem and unfortunately I took after my father. It truly made my early teenage years a nightmare. It was character building but I'd never want my child to go through that.

I shaved then moved on to waxing and then an epilady which was cheap but really painful with ingrown hairs galore. I dabbled with professional electrolysis which was slow and painful and bleach which stung. I finally bought a Silkn IPL unit and it was literally life changing. I didnt have any hormone issues, just inherited very dark hair and genes that must have been a boon in the ice age.

I don't think shaving makes hair grow more strongly. It might feel stronger because it is shorter but you aren't doing anything to the root. I'd get your daughter checked and if its not medical I'd try shaving first and then move on to IPL when she is a bit older.

By the way I didn't find IPL very painful - more sort of mildly prickly. My son did try it out on his back and it really only stung in one patch and that was at maximum strength.

Have had s read.

Agree with others doc first.
Waxing or threading.
Esp as these things aren't sold as use for children.

Other point. Is she showing discomfort/ self consciousness?

I don't think it's right for you to decide she's too hairy and it will be a risk of bullying and to make the decision for her to remove it permanently.

She can decide that if and when.

I also think it's. Well. Plenty of girls at DD school have dark hair on faces etc. I think to assume bullying etc is really negative.

There's also the point that different people would do different things as your DD might choose to. You think pits legs face and other places. Others might include arms. I mean it's all personal isn't it.

Also the message that how she is naturally is certain to get a bad reaction and it has to go forever or she will get comments etc. It's not a great message.

Doc first.

100%. I wish my mum had taken me for a laser!

I see somebody recommended abrasive mitts. With heavy hair growth I found that I was minus a layer of skin before I was minus the hair. On a school trip two of us got stranded in a sailboat in the middle of a bay when the wind dropped I wasn't worried about drowning because the pain of salt water hitting my poor sandpapered legs was my main focus and was praying we didn't have to swim for it. In retrospect I cant believe the lax safety standards we had. The only help was a teacher bellowing inaudible instructions from the beach.

Don’t let her use an epilator. I found it resulted in painful ingrowing hairs. Do be proactive a try Luke’s or similar. When ASD girls start secondary school, they can find it hard to deal with new social pressures and expectations. Mean girls can be very tough indeed. Don’t give them an opening.
I speak from liver experience with ASD, but was not diagnosed until 40.

Speaking from the aesthetic and cosmetic industry- do the laser and never look back

Sorry I can't help with the hair removal recommendations but have you had her seen by your GP? This sounds like it could be PCOS or possibly, another hormone condition. Could be completely normal for your daughter but definitely get it checked out.

@CtrlU

Speaking from the aesthetic and cosmetic industry- do the laser and never look back

I thought it wasn't recommended under a certain age?

This is a child and it's her mum who worries.

Temp solutions. Let her make her mind up about permanent when she's older.

Some people remove hair on different parts. Pits, arms, half or full leg, some or all pubic hair etc.

Imposing the mum view of what is acceptable and what is not, permanently, on a kid. I think is dodgy.

Amazed so many people say yay.

How many sessions would it take to permanently laser legs pits parts of face? I mean I don't know. Would be interested.

I really don’t think that would be safe on such young delicate skin. Please seek advice from a professional!

neither safe nor ethical

Lumea isn’t suitable for youngsters, but I would 100% take her for leg, face and chin waxing. Don’t bother with any creams or bleaches, they aren’t as good.
When she’s older look into laser for her face, from experience it’s definitely worth it.