Hi there, first time poster! Just wondering whether you can help me understand whether I am overreacting or not?
To cut a long story short my DD from a previous relationship came back from her dad’s early because she had been sick. At this point I had no reason to believe that it was a sickness bug as my ex said that no one else in the house had been sick. However, when she got back my ex’s house he proceeded to tell me she’d been sick more than once. She wasn’t sick once she got home but was quite poorly and run down for a few days. I made sure I sanitised all her stuff and put all of her clothes on a hot wash to minimise chances of germs being spread but this didn’t work as my DS (1) was violently sick throughout the night and morning a few days later, however he perked up pretty quickly and wasn’t dehydrated or anything. A few days pass and I thought that DP and I had managed to avoid getting sick. Had a nice morning with my two DC after the rest of the week being a write off with them both being poorly. However, yesterday afternoon I started to feel a bit rubbish, I put DS down for a late nap so I could lay on the sofa while my DD was playing nicely on her own. I then started to be violently sick every five minutes or more. It got to the point it was bad that when my DS woke up I had to quickly change him and stick him in the cot with some books to busy him while I kept being violently sick. This really upset both children to see me being ill and I couldn’t really parent properly with my head down the loo so I messaged my partner at work to tell him but he told me he couldn’t come home. I rang my father to vent and have a cry and he could see the state I was in so offered to come round (masked and gloved up) to help look after the DC. I was so lucky he did come over because I was glued to the toilet right up to the point when my partner came home. As soon as he got back he told me he’d be sleeping downstairs (which I was fine with) however he said to keep DS in my room in his cot who was now asleep. I kept getting up throughout the night to be sick, I was being as quiet as I could but DS is a bad sleeper anyway so kept waking up crying while I was in the toilet. Which woke up DP who came up to console DS while shouting at me saying I’m keeping him up (he only came up twice in the night so did get some sleep downstairs).
Both the children had me up early this morning, I tried to occupy them upstairs so DP could have somewhat of a lay in because he has to work later but had to bring them down about eight this morning because they were getting restless and hungry. I presumed when we came down DP would help with the DC, getting their breakfast sorted and playing with them because I was still feeling really rough with a bad belly, feeling sick and no sleep. When I did come down he announced that he had no sleep and I was feeling better now (which I wasn’t) so said he was going back to bed. I had to wake him up because I needed to be sick again so asked he could go downstairs to watch the children. He proceeded to shout at me and called me a selfish and all other names under the sun. He’s now gaslighting me saying that our one year old coped better with being sick than me. To put some context to the situation I am SAHM (currently looking for a part time job) I’m responsible for everything in the house and looking after both children (which I don’t mind) but would think with me being ill my DP would cut me some slack and help out a bit more?
Yabu - I should suck it up and get on with it
Yanbu - DP should help out
Thank you for listening to my rambling post, I hope it makes some sense. I blame the sleep deprivation and stomach bug if not!