To ask if anyone else gets anxious about this?

[stilltiredinthemorning]

I'm so anxious about my daughter going back to school. She'll be going into Y1. Obviously she missed nearly half of her Reception year. She has some additional needs and struggles to express her feelings very clearly. I think she's going to really struggle in Y1, but obviously I don't actually know that she will. I can't believe how anxious I feel about it already. I know it'll be coming off me in waves by the time she's due to go back. I was the same when she was in Reception and had panic attacks most days at drop off. I just can't bear the idea of her being sad/distressed and no one noticing and me not being there and then her not being able to tell me when she gets home!

Does anyone else feel like this? My friends seem to think I'm mad. I've loved the holidays and would happily home school, but I think she does enjoy school and it's the best best place for her...?

Arrrrrgggghhhh!

No, it's not normal to feel like that. You should see your GP.

Do the school know about her additional needs? Did they have anything in place for her when she started Reception?
If not, perhaps it would be worth having a chat with the teacher or a class TA and just letting them know some of your concerns. I worked as a TA in Y1 for a couple of years, and I'd have been happy to have a reassuring chat with a nervous parent.

Regular panic attacks need treatment. Self refer for some free CBT on the nhs. Google iapt.

I was a TA and would have done anything to help the children - I'm sure she'll be well looked after. Just talk to someone at the school door and explain you are feeling uncertain.

Daily panic attacks at drop off time are not normal or pleasant for you or your daughter. This needs attention. It is not good for your daughter to be witnessing her mum having a panic attack over her going to school.

Did you have any reports from the school that she wasn't cooing in reception or are you just imagining what possibly may have happened? If you have had discussions with the school about your daughter's additional needs, what are they doing to help her, day to day and during the transition from YR to Y1?
Honestly though, you need to get help with the panic attacks as a matter of urgency.

The school are aware of her additional needs, though we are in the early stages of ascertaining exactly what they are and how she may be best supported (she has delayed language and social and emotional development, but also a few other difficulties) I have seen the GP and have been prescribed a whole array of things including beta blockers and SSRIs. What's odd is that I've never suffered with anxiety/panic attacks in the past and it all seems to be related to my daughter. To be clear, I would hold it together until she'd gone in then just collapse in the car. It was easier because of all the COVID restrictions as there was no waiting around and the mask obscured my face and made my irregular breathing less noticeable. I'm quite sure I didn't manage to hide my anxiety from her entirely though and I hate how frightened and vulnerable it makes me feel. I've been totally fine over the holidays, but can feel it building back up as we get closer to the beginning of term.

Can you ask the teacher and TA if you could have a communication book that they could write a short summary in of your DD’s day?

I work in a school and would be happy to write a few lines to reassure a parent.