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AIBU?

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Original poster

Pay increase as a manager or part time with pay cut

18 replies

SuddenArborealStop · 26/08/2021 10:46

Posting in AIBU for voting.

I've been really stressed at work ,I do a 4 day week and do 5 days work in that time, although I try never to do overtime I do not take a lunch break.
I reached my limits and doc prescribed anti depressants which I haven't started yet and I started counselling.
During this period I applied for a local school hours job as I was at my wits end with work and a 3 and 1 year old.

Yesterday I finally had a work review and was offered 5 days pay to continue 4 days workShock which would be a move into management. I see this as potentially more stress though the plan is to get a lot of day to day tasks on to someone else's desk.
The director who offered this didn't have board approval so it's not official yet. Also I've complained about workload for months and only when I started talking about leaving was it acknowledged.

I've been feeling better but I don't know how long that will last. The part time job has offered me an interview which I'm going to go to. It would be a 10k paycut on top of the decrease in days but I could pull one child out of creche and cancel the cleaner etc so it's not a straightforward loss of funds but I will have less.

I'm not sure which route to go, I know I'm losing pension contributions and the role is a step down however the title is good so don't think CV will suffer.

YABU - stay where you are you'd be mad to turn down the cash
YANBU - take the easy job life's too short

OP posts:
ThisIsStartingToBoreMe · 26/08/2021 11:03

What would be best for your children?

Xiaoxiong · 26/08/2021 11:09

I could pull one child out of creche and cancel the cleaner

It seems to me that you would be replacing paid work with unpaid work (housework and childcare), so while maybe net you would end up the same, you'd be taking a pay cut and reducing pension contributions.

If it were me, this would be more stressful than doing the 4 days work for full-time pay, plus seeing management progression. I'd be worried I'd not be able to get back to that level again for quite some time, even if my kids will be in school soon and I can charge back onto my career path. But I'm not you Grin so only you can say if this trade-off would make you more or less happy.

Parttimemostofthetime · 26/08/2021 11:11

I'd take the easier life, lifestyle not for working

MaggieFS · 26/08/2021 11:19

Just paying you more isn't going to solve the issues in your current job. And moving into management will presumably only add pressure. I would be very sceptical about what is being promised. (But that could be completely unfounded).

I would be seeking a third option which is a resolution to your workload issues in your current role, if you don't need the pay increase. With a firm fixed date for it to be sorted out so it doesn't drag for months again.

From what you've said, I'm not sure how the reduced hours term time role would help if you then have a child to look after and cleaning to do, but presumably the potential new job wouldn't have the same stress. If you can manage the finances it does sound more appealing given how unhelpful your current employer has been to date.

HarrietsChariot · 26/08/2021 11:20

Don't take the managerial role, it will be a lot more stressful and it sounds like it is bad enough there as it is. Yes in theory you could pass a lot of your existing work to someone else, but in the real world it doesn't work like that - managers manage whilst simultaneously being expected to do a fulltime job. Take the easy option.

Aprilx · 26/08/2021 11:24

If you are stressed at work, moving into a managerial position sounds like just about the worst thing you could do. I know people can be very quick to complain about “management” and say they doing do anything, but I don’t think this is true. Management is going to increase your responsibilities and hence your stress. If you think that all management means is passing work on to other people and washing your hands of it, are mistaken. I think you need to look into third (or fourth or fifth) options.

Sonders · 26/08/2021 11:31

It seems like giving the new role a go would be a good idea. It might give you the power to delegate more of the tasks that bring the most misery.

And if it's a stressful as you fear then you still have the option to look at part time roles.

Original poster
SuddenArborealStop · 26/08/2021 11:35

@Aprilx

If you are stressed at work, moving into a managerial position sounds like just about the worst thing you could do. I know people can be very quick to complain about “management” and say they doing do anything, but I don’t think this is true. Management is going to increase your responsibilities and hence your stress. If you think that all management means is passing work on to other people and washing your hands of it, are mistaken. I think you need to look into third (or fourth or fifth) options.
I definitely don't think that managing will mean passing the work over but that's how it was sold to me. As time for big thinking. My brain is mush right now and I'm not even sure it's capable of big thinking. I thought I could do a few months at the higher pay and get some cash into savings before going part-time but the other job is sooo convenient and I'm trying to think what will be best when the kids are at school.
OP posts:
Original poster
SuddenArborealStop · 26/08/2021 11:37

@MaggieFS

Just paying you more isn't going to solve the issues in your current job. And moving into management will presumably only add pressure. I would be very sceptical about what is being promised. (But that could be completely unfounded).

I would be seeking a third option which is a resolution to your workload issues in your current role, if you don't need the pay increase. With a firm fixed date for it to be sorted out so it doesn't drag for months again.

From what you've said, I'm not sure how the reduced hours term time role would help if you then have a child to look after and cleaning to do, but presumably the potential new job wouldn't have the same stress. If you can manage the finances it does sound more appealing given how unhelpful your current employer has been to date.

I asked about the third option ie doing less days at current job and was told maybe instead of doing 5 days in 4 I could cut it down to 3.5 days in 3 Hmm
OP posts:
DGFB · 26/08/2021 11:37

Why would you leave well paid work to do more cleaning and clearing up?

Original poster
SuddenArborealStop · 26/08/2021 11:39

@DGFB

Why would you leave well paid work to do more cleaning and clearing up?
100% only for less stress which affects all parts of my life currently
OP posts:
NotYourCupOfTea · 26/08/2021 11:40

If they only want to offer you more because your leaving that would worry me
Plus how can they reduce your workload? Who are these people who are suddenly available to help but aren’t helping you currently when you are telling them about how much work you have?

Life is to short and school hour jobs sound hard to find

Dogoodfeelgood · 26/08/2021 11:41

Congratulations on your promotion! Go to new role and take the promotion and career progression. You may find that your stress is reduced and as a manager you actually do less of the day to day tasks. If it’s still stressful you can find another part time job soon. Don’t put the breaks on yourself but move up until you’re in a position to call the shots and earn more money while doing it.

xyzandabc · 26/08/2021 11:41

Unless you really really want a management role don't do it.

If you can afford the 10k pay cut, a term time only role is worth its weight in gold dust once the kids are at school in terms of convenience and savings on holiday childcare. Though you haven't actually got that job yet so don't decide anything too hastily until it's actually been offered.

Dogoodfeelgood · 26/08/2021 11:43

Plus with your promoted role and new title you’ll be in a better position to find work at a different company, perhaps even better paid part time work in the future?

Dogoodfeelgood · 26/08/2021 11:44

I would use this time to negotiate in your new role for a great title and better pay, if they’ve offered you X, ask for X+10%. You have more power than you think.

Wilmaa · 26/08/2021 11:50

School jobs are very hard to get and I would snap someone's hand off for one.
Your on anti-depressants (or been prescribed atleast) due to your current work life, do you think being a manager is going to be any easier? No, it's only going to cause more stress.
Take some time out doing the school job, get yourself back and enjoy the freedom that comes with it.
There's nothing stopping you getting another job similar to the one your in now in a couple of years.
But if it was me and a job was making me unwell I'd leave.

rookiemere · 26/08/2021 12:44

I'd go for the easier job for sure.
If you enjoyed your current role then I'd say differently, or if no other job was available but that isn't the case.
You're still working so it's not like you're jacking in your career just making it more manageable when DCs are young.
I went down a grade at work when DS was young for various reasons and do not regret it.

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