To write to the vendor?

[Extraslice]

Missed out on our dream house yesterday and I have woken up feeling so flat this morning. We have been looking for months and not seen anything that has even come close to it. Worst part is we were in the running but the vendor went with a cash buyer.
I have met the vendor twice as she did her own viewings. Lovely lady. Expressed via the EA how sorry she was that we didn’t get it but it was just their position that did it. For background, we offered asking price and I believe cash buyers went slightly below as they often do.
I have said to EA to let us know if it falls through, but WIBU to also send a note to the vendor reiterating our interest and provide our contact details if this should happen?
Also what would you say without sounding desperate??

The estate agent will let you know if the house becomes available again. I wouldn't write to the vendor. She has to look after her own interests.

Have you offered more money? It sounds like they've taken the cash buyer even though it's slightly less because of the convenience. You need to make an offer that is worth more than the inconvenience not being a cash buyer causes.

We have just sold, honestly something like this wouldn't have made any difference to me as a seller.

We had a similar disappointment when buying, a house we wanted went to a first time buyer even though we offered significantly more. The seller didn't want a chain, that suited their circumstances and it was their decision to make.

We got another (better) house so stay positive.

Siiigh. Ok, thank you all. She didn’t want to go to a bidding war so there was no opportunity to up our offer. Sounds like she near enough accepted the cash offer straight away. I understand it as a seller (we had the same when selling ours) I just feel sad and like I maybe could have done more somehow.

I am so bored of Rightmove!

We had given up looking as it was soul destroying, I blocked rightmove from my phone and everything. Then a week later someone sent me a fb link with the house we ended up buying and the rest is history.

We are in a hotspot and had loads of disappointed people when we accepted an offer on our old house too. I felt sooo bad but I could only choose one!

I feel like doing that @Usual2usual! Glad yours worked out in the end.
It’s a really hard time to be buying. Our buyer is starting to our pressure on us and we have a 6 week old so it’s starting to get to me now.

I would send her a note. A friendly one saying thanks for showing around understand why you went with other people and if the process doesn’t go as smoothly as you want we would still be interested.

If the buyers start messing around with survey deductions etc the estate agent may not contact you as they will want to keep that sale going. She may feel differently.

@Jarstastic that’s a j or way to put it.
And this was my thinking. I am not doing it to gazump the other buyers who got it fair and square, but just to make sure she has my details and know how serious we are with our offer. She was lovely so I don’t think she would take offence.

Urgh, I can’t stop thinking about it.

nice way to out it

put !!

Hi op,everything happens for a reason,if you are meant to live there you will,if not your next home will be the one that is right for you.try to stay positive.🌈

Thank you m, I hope you’re right!

Cash buyer is one thing (not that desirable for the seller if you ask me) but are you in a chain?

If you need to need to sell your own property, you are obviously less attractive as a buyer.

I wouldn't. My nan sold her house and had to choose between several similar offers. It was a very emotional process as it was the house that her and my grandad had lived in for forty years, raised children, grandchildren etc and he had recently passed. After she chose who she was selling the house to, she had a couple of the potential buyers do the same as what you're considering and she found it upsetting. It came across as being pushy and a lack of understanding of how much thought had gone into the choice she had made to sell the house to. Although this lady may not be in that position as my nan, as a pp said the EA will let you know if the sale falls through. I get your thinking behind the letter but sometimes you have to let these things go.

This exact situation happened to us. She went with cash buyer because it was quicker but we sold and moved out 2 weeks before she had done her sale so we were actually quicker.

I'm glad we never got that house now as much as I was gutted at the time. The perfect house came up a couple of weeks later.

We were in an identical situation and it is a wrench not getting it, especially when you haven't even technically been outbid so there's nothing you can do to change things. I wouldn't bother sending a letter, I think cash sales go through pretty quick so it's unlikely to fall through unless they turn out not to be a genuine cash buyer. We ended up finding an even better house that we had previously discounted because we were fixated on the other one. In a day or two you'll probably feel like looking again and getting enthusiastic about other houses. I always feel like losing out on a house is like getting dumped, you imagined your future one way then all your dreams are gone! But then I do get too emotionally attached to houses.

I wouldn’t directly contact the vendor. The agents have your details and will be in touch if the sale doesn’t proceed.

I’ve accepted a cash offer on one of my properties this week purely on the basis that they are able to proceed to completion faster, despite that offer not being the highest.

Yeah it’s a really tough one to take!
I definitely got invested in it. I visited twice and really explored the area which is more than we have done on any others. And
We have sold to a FTB so still in a good position. My dd has been talking about the garden today 😭 bless her, she is just as bored as me being dragged round houses every weekend!

I’m so gutted. I have felt really depressed the past couple of days. Never thought I would feel this way about a house! We have cancelled our viewing see had lined up this weekend as feel it is pointless looking at others

Just wanted to say that I am in virtually the same position. Made the momentous decision to move out of our dream home (due to noisy neighbours) and after extensive searching found the "dream" house. Offered over asking and met the vendor who I felt I had a connection with. They went with someone chain free. I was gutted. Amazingly it came back on the market as the sale fell through (it turns out the buyers were never that sure about it after all) and EA rang us immediately to ask if we were still interested. We were, we viewed again and offered again over asking. Waited 48 hours (and thought this was fate stepping in) and got told again that no, our offer was not accepted as they went with someone in a better position (no chain again). To say I was gutted is an understatement (sorry), and nothing even slightly as nice is coming up on right move. We are going to have to rent now at vast expense.

However, I do keep telling myself that things happen for a reason!

@SpeckledlyHen oh what a kick in the nethers for it to happen twice 😫 I’m sorry.
We will probably have to rent too

Although I say that about renting, it is not proving easy either! literally just found out this second that a property I applied for has been taken off the market now as a family member is going to rent it - I took a day off work and everything to view it - total waste of time. I will be in a caravan at this rate.. Lady luck is not shining on us at the moment!