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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu if I insist on a referral?

2 replies

ImagineEduardo · 24/08/2021 21:09

Please bear with me as this is my first post and it has been a stressful week. I was hoping for advice/opinions on my current situation as I don't really have anyone to talk to here. I'm in my 40s and going through early menopause for last 6 years, after losing an ovary (not cancer related). I've had very irregular periods or no periods at all during that time. For a while I have been experiencing spotting before any irregular periods but last month I was bleeding for over 3 weeks, often very heavily. I contacted my Dr 2 weeks ago and had an appointment for an internal exam plus swabs. I also have an appointment for blood tests tomorrow. Dr identified an ulcer in my cervix and said it wasn't where she 'would expect to see it'. She said she didn't want to refer me on straight away for further tests and instead she wanted to see me again at the end of the month to discuss results and see if it is still an issue. Which I was fine with. However, since the exam I have been suffering increasing pain in my lower pelvis, top of legs and back. I didnt overreact as assumed it was a reaction to the exam. But by the weekend tablets weren't helping much and I was feeling very tender with sharp pains that were waking me during the night. I messaged Dr again yesterday to ask if this was to be expected and she called me today to ask me to go in within the hour for another exam. All of my tests have come back with no signs of any infections. The exam today was very painful but she gave no comment on what it achieved. She has just given me stronger pain killers. She said she would see me again, as planned at the end of the month for another internal exam, but if things got worse to contact the surgery again. I asked what she thought it might be if not an infection, could it just settle still and if I started bleeding again next week would it stop an exam. She just tilted her head and said 'mmm' and didn't actually say anything that indicated she had a plan or reason to delay further tests with a specialist. The pain has increased and the new painkillers haven't stopped the pain. I struggled to lift a full shopping bag earlier. Driving and at one point just moving my torso was painful. I usually don't read google about symptoms but in the absence of any kind of information from my Dr I started to look this afternoon. Now I'm worried if it is serious that time is crucial and honestly I have no idea what waiting until next week will achieve. I dont believe the blood tests she has listed will give any certainty without further tests. I really don't know what to do but I'm feeling very worried. Can/should I call to insist on a referral or is that unreasonable?
(Sorry for long post I just wanted to give a full picture)

OP posts:
LadyFannyButton · 25/08/2021 12:43

I think there are fairly strict criteria for referrals & have heard of people having referrals rejected and being bounced back to the GP if certain criteria haven’t been met. By all means contact the GP and request a referral but there is a lot of ‘watch and wait’ if obvious flags (for e.g cancer) aren’t there. Is booking a private gynae consultation an option? It could be just a couple of hundred pounds (not something I could afford by sibling has done it in the past)but might be worth it if it puts your mind at rest re being time crucial. I hope you manage to get seen soon Flowers
www.worcestershire.nhs.uk/EasysiteWeb/getresource.axd?AssetID=157394&type=full&servicetype=Attachment

housemdwaswrong · 25/08/2021 12:53

I think I would insit in a phonecall to discuss things further. Find out what she is thinking in terms of possible causes, and then, if that doesn't clarify it to ask outright why she is waiting until the end of the month, what she thinks will have changed by then.

If you have email consult, numbering the questions helps I find. Doctors annoy me when they are ambiguous, I deal with them a lot, and always fo in with a pen and paper with questions written down and write their answers down, it helps me to manage my chronic condition. I know it's slightly different for you, but you still need answers, and need to insist on them. I have one consultant I have to ask the same question a few times before I get an answer I can understand. It's your body, it's not the secret service, you should be working with your GP, not being kept in the dark.

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