In pointing out the negatives of dog ownership to a pal considering getting one?

[Firingpingpongs]

I'm not against getting a dog but some of my friends who have recently gotten a puppy are having such a hard time and it's of their own making - life too busy to properly train dog, other pets in household don't get on with dog, separation anxiety by both owners and dog. These friends look nothing but hassled and anxious and constantly moan about their decision.

Other friends have gotten dogs and it's been totally fine.

The latest friend is considering getting puppy that is a very big dog breed whilst she also has a middle aged cat.

AIBU in mentioning anything or should I just assume that they are grown ups and able to make their own decision.

BTW I'm not considering this because I'm a busy body type, I am actually a real animal lover and my concerns are for the animals themselves (one friend's cat's life has been traumatised by the arrival of a dog and it hasn't gotten any better 3 years down the line).

@Darthwader

Why are so many pps assuming the op's friend won't look after the dog?

Because there is a loud cohort on MN convinced that only they themselves are worthy of dog ownership, or that anyone who has never previously owned a dog is incapable of doing so. All puppies will be neglected or abandoned, or the prospective owners have given no thought whatsoever to the hard work it takes to own a puppy. It is up to these Enlightened Ones to educate the ignorant who foolishly think they are good enough to care for a dog.

I wouldn't say anything because chances are, they won't listen to you.

We have a dog and the learning curve was massive (we'd only had cats before) but I wouldn't have listened to anyone who had warned me against it - simply because our puppy was so wanted and we'd been waiting years for him to arrive, too.

Is it hard? It was when he was a puppy, yes. But now he's an adult, he just slots in around us. He'll sleep in until 9am or later, he spends most of his day snuggling on the sofa or napping and as long as he's had a walk, he's happy to just chill around the house.

We also have three cats and introducing the dog was no bother whatsoever.

Some people do struggle with their dogs but not everyone does - I love mine and wouldn't swap him for anything. Unless they ask for your advice, keep your nose out. There's no guarantee they'll find it hard.

Mumsnet has a strange amount of people that seem to think nobody should be allowed any pets and they really like to suck the joy out of it. I imagine them to be the same people that get stressed out about “life admin” whatever that is…

It’s not that difficult in most cases, and everyone that claims to know it all was once new to dog ownership.

Your friend isn’t stupid is she? Why don’t you think she can do her own research?

@iBrows

Mumsnet has a strange amount of people that seem to think nobody should be allowed any pets and they really like to suck the joy out of it. I imagine them to be the same people that get stressed out about “life admin” whatever that is…

It’s not that difficult in most cases, and everyone that claims to know it all was once new to dog ownership.

Your friend isn’t stupid is she? Why don’t you think she can do her own research?

Yep, so many superior dog owners on MN who think they know best and nobody else could possibly understand what pet ownership entails, lol.

There are millions of dog owners in the UK - they all had to start somewhere - even the so-called experts were newbies once

I wouldn’t say anything.

@Farwest

Is your friend an idiot? Generally irresponsible? Is the cat mistreated or neglected?

Because I would assume that any friend considering a dog had already thought about the difficulties of dog ownership, same as I wouldn't say to a friend who was TTC, hey, have you thought about the sleepless nights and the cost of childcare? Like that would be news to them and had never crossed their ignorant minds.

Fair enough to discuss breeds with her if you have some specific knowledge to share. No? Then stay in your lane.

You sound condescending.

I mainly agree with this.

Do you have dogs? If not then I can't think you're opinion is going to be taken particularly seriously.

I've recently got a puppy, after many years of waiting. I knew what I was letting myself in for. Asking she's a reasonably responsible adult it's logical to think she knows what she's doing. If one of my friends gave me a lecture about getting a puppy beforehand it would not have been very well received.

Love my dog but they do tie you. My kids older we all do our share. But hard when you work full T. My daughter had to let him out on school lunch break when she here

If I say anything it’ll just be in relation to the cat and it’d just be in passing, otherwise she’s intelligent and responsible so I can only assume she’s done her homework and like most of you say, it’s none of my business really.

I was just thinking about all the fuss about eating meat and how cows produce methane - when everybody under the sun in the UK is getting a blooming dog - they aren't without effect on the planet..........