Midlife crisis- what did you do?

[Purplelemon7]

Is there anything that can be done to get over it and how long did yours last?

I’m in my mid 30s and been through a few transitions recently which may have triggered it (young family and changes at work where I’ve been for a decade). I find myself bored off life and nostalgic for the past. I’ve achieved many of the things that I wanted in terms of a partner, kids, job, home etc. Everything used to feel new and fresh and exciting but now those same things just don’t elicit the same feeling any more. We have a holiday (just DH and I) planned and ordinarily that would be something I’d look forward to and now I just feel ‘meh’ about it. With a very young family it’s hard to do things like volunteering, hobbies etc but even if I could I don’t find the idea energising. I find myself thinking of the past (something I’ve never done before) and worrying about the future (mostly about my parents dying).

Is there anything I can do to shift my mindset to be more grateful? I try but it’s so hard.

@afghanistanwhatnow changing my career really helped. I did it 2 yrs pre covid. However apart from work I quite unmotivated.

Know exactly how you feel. Mid 30s, 2 small kids and nothing seems to energise or excite me any more - even if I get precious time off from the kids, I can’t seem to be enthused about it. The ONE thing which has helped a bit- especially during lockdowns but also before and after - has been getting into gardening… I started from scratch - it’s a mix of planning, creativity, actual physical graft, and it’s lovely to feel proud of the results. I like the really long term nature of it too - I can think about the whole year ahead. We don’t have masses of space so that’s the limiting factor for me.

I still feel quite low - and like others have mentioned, have been considering whether I need some low dose antidepressants. But some garden time definitely gives a bit of a lift.