To think children can go a couple of hours without eating

[OnlyFoolsnMothers]

Not sure if this is just the people I hang out with but every park play date I go on at the moment (there’s quite a few- child is 4), the other parent brings with them copious amounts of snacks.
I’m in no way a food nazi, my child has a morning snack, the odd ice cream when out on hot days, a biscuit pudding after her dinner - I always carry water and an apple- but even I think she can manage 2 hrs in a park without me having to produce a family size bag of crisps, popcorn, a fruit shoot, a haribo.
I’m really fed up of it, firstly because I’m the grinch who says “no” when my daughter asks if she can stuff her face 2hrs before dinner and secondly, because then (unsurprisingly) the other kid sits there eating rather than playing.
If you take a picnic amount of food to a 2pm play date- pls why?

Neither my husband nor I were brought up in the snack culture - in fact my school forbade eating outside the school whilst in school uniform (ordinary state school too).

My own children weren't routinely fed snacks either and neither of them ever fainted from hunger.

@SunbathingDragon

Why do you hang out with these people since you clearly don’t like them or agree with their way of parenting?

I really can’t see how it impacts you if other children are fed snacks or not.

I can disagree with someone’s parenting and like them as a person. It does affect me for the two reasons mentioned, it puts me under pressure from DC who thinks I’m being mean and secondly we have to wait whilst her friend shoves down Doritos before resuming play. Oh and something doesn’t need to directly affect you to have an opinion

@54321nought experts usually suggest that natural term weaning would be around age 7 actually.

I'm with you OP I usually have an apple in my bag of she is hungry
I hate the amount of sweets that get dished out at the park

Aside from the general health side to this debate, I also want my child to know she can enjoy an activity for the activity- not because it comes with a side of snacks.
You can enjoy the park for the park
You can go to a trampoline park without a litre size slush puppy

We have breakfast, and leave straight after & sometimes stay for 2-3h but I premake the snack the night before. It's usually cucumber, carrots or tomato.

I always keep a small chocolate as I struggle with a meltdown in public and bribery works lol

All the continual eating is why there's an obesity epidemic. Only storing up problems around food for later.

It definitely wasn’t the norm when I was growing up in the ‘80s. We always had to wait for mealtimes so we didn’t ‘spoil’ our lunch/tea. That was totally normal among my peers. That said, we usually had a break time biscuit at school in the morning.

When we were older and at high school, we did used to have toast and cereal on getting home.

I think you have to be mindful of peoples’ individual circumstances.

Saying the worst case scenario is a fainting child in a flippant way isn’t nice. My child has fainted. Multiple times. We’ve had many hospitals admissions and tests. Until you’ve ever seen your toddler pass out, I don’t think you can really comment.

We take snacks. Not sweets or crisps and pop as routine snacks due to DDs medical needs, although we do always have a flapjack or sugary snack in the bag for an emergency, but we’d always have cheese, fruit, water, yoghurt or similar. If you don’t want to give your child snacks that’s cool, but don’t judge me and mine.

The mumsnet anti-snack, 'I'm a better parent because I make my child wait for dinner' thing always really.confuses me.

The NHS and the various child.nutritionists I follow recommend snacks for.children 1-5 at least (and I've not seen anything to suggest that they dont advise them over 5 but then mine is still very little so haven't really looked).

If your child eats well and a good variety at mealtimes then great, perhaps they're less important. But many children eat smaller meals and need snacks between to keep them going, plus snacks can be a good way to increase variety and add different nutrients to their diet. Which does mean they need to be healthy in the first place of course, not the crisps and haribo mentioned in the OP.

Only thing I bring to the park is a drink and an apple, my daughter is 3, she doesn't really snack and if she does it's just fruit. It does mean she eats her lunch and dinner with no bother, I do get annoyed when we're out with kids that just graze all day because like you said your child can't help but ask for food!

@PointeShoesandTutus

I think you have to be mindful of peoples’ individual circumstances.

Saying the worst case scenario is a fainting child in a flippant way isn’t nice. My child has fainted. Multiple times. We’ve had many hospitals admissions and tests. Until you’ve ever seen your toddler pass out, I don’t think you can really comment.

We take snacks. Not sweets or crisps and pop as routine snacks due to DDs medical needs, although we do always have a flapjack or sugary snack in the bag for an emergency, but we’d always have cheese, fruit, water, yoghurt or similar. If you don’t want to give your child snacks that’s cool, but don’t judge me and mine.

Very sorry for what you’ve been through, but you appreciate you are most likely in the minority. And no I’ve never seen my child faint, have multiple seizures yes but never faint.

@PointeShoesandTutus

I think you have to be mindful of peoples’ individual circumstances.

Saying the worst case scenario is a fainting child in a flippant way isn’t nice. My child has fainted. Multiple times. We’ve had many hospitals admissions and tests. Until you’ve ever seen your toddler pass out, I don’t think you can really comment.

We take snacks. Not sweets or crisps and pop as routine snacks due to DDs medical needs, although we do always have a flapjack or sugary snack in the bag for an emergency, but we’d always have cheese, fruit, water, yoghurt or similar. If you don’t want to give your child snacks that’s cool, but don’t judge me and mine.

Don't think anyone mentioned medical needs. That is a different thing altogether.

@SlipperyDippery

Honestly the amount of fucking food police on this thread is so depressing.

It is literally none of your business what other people feed their children.

Totally agree.

It annoys me that mother’s who don’t want their DC to eat something expect my DC to also not eat it - no, if my child is given a treat by me, they can eat it. I’m not here to ensure your child does not see you as mean.

I sometimes take my children to the park without snacks but most of the time they complain they are hungry and insist on going home to eat because they’re so hungry. I’m a little suspicious they’re just being melodramatic and they like eating, but who knows, they complain regardless. It’s easier to take something for them to eat. They’re very active and healthy weight so it’s not worth the drama.

OP is describing a lot of food as 'snack'. I will grant them that. I would have tried to make it all fruit at that age, too, so not quite how I did things, either. Even though I am a contended grazer myself.

You're gonna have to ask your friend "Why" or find a way to get your DD to accept other people have different lives, OP.

@chaosmaker

All the continual eating is why there's an obesity epidemic. Only storing up problems around food for later.

Exactly! The basic “oh but my child is thin argument” is ridiculous- the child shoving popcorn in her mouth at last wks play date was thin, but doesn’t eat any of her meals (her mum tells me). It’s about good habits

Am I understanding correctly that people are expecting other people not to give their children snacks so that they don’t have to tell her children that they can’t have any snacks?

Fucking hell.

My older daughter is a tricky eater and I don’t let her snack much because otherwise she won’t eat properly at meal times. So if we are with another child who is given a snack, and she asks me for one, I say no.

I also don’t sit around and wait for the other child to finish their snack, I take her off and play hide and seek or whatever.

You really can’t expect other people to adjust what they feed their child and when just for your convenience.

@54321nought

My 5 year old has lunch at 11:30 at school and i collect him 4 hours later at 3:30 so yes, I bring him food...!!!!!

why?

thats only 4 hours!

just why?

I suppose because the child is hungry?

I hope you aren't a parent.

I’m sorry to hear that. We’ve had one seizure and that was more than enough.

But my point is - to look at my DD (and possibly the others on here that have mentioned medical needs) you’d never know. She looks like a normal, healthy child. Most of our friends have no idea.

But I know if her blood sugars get low, it’s bad news. So if she’s not eaten lunch, because she’s 3 and sometimes a pain in the bum, I will be the mum pushing a babybel on her at the park, especially if she’s running around with her friends like a nutter.

@chaosmaker

All the continual eating is why there's an obesity epidemic. Only storing up problems around food for later.

Oh that's an embarrassing comment. What utter fucking shit you're talking.

@Flatdisco actually, not feeding a hungry child is much more likely to cause future problems with food. I can only assume that all these people not feeding their children snacks have very under active children. Children that move and exercise and play burn a lot of calories.

I agree with you OP. My family members who have overweight children somehow are blind to the link between the amount of food offered to them constantly. Breakfast, snack, lunch snack, dinner, snack, their children never experience hunger.

I agree. I met with a friend whose son had 4 packets of crisps in the space of 3 hours 😳 he’s 2! My DP’s daughter I noticed can’t go an hour without asking for a snack. I really struggle with it. I am a Nanny who looks after 6 kids and fruit is always available but really when I take them out we take a lunch and that’s it. As OP days the odd ice cream on a hot day if we’re out for the day. I feel mean too but I know it’s not right to just constantly be feeding them crap.

I can't work out whether your issue is the quality/portion size of the snacks or simply the fact that other people give their children snacks, so I can't work out whether you're a bit unreasonable or incredibly unreasonable