Feel silly for sending details now

[Fizzysweets1]

I was told the other day that I had saved someone’s life, won’t go into too much detail but I found them at home and alerted the emergency services who were able to help him
, and luckily he is expected to make a full recovery.

His parents were so grateful to me, but I think anyone would have done the same in my shoes. They insisted on buying me a gift to say thank you, I said they didn’t have to at all but they were insistent on me giving my bank details so they could send money. They said they would send it right away.

I sent my account number and sort code and have never received anything. It’s been a few days now, I totally understand if they have changed their minds and don’t want to anymore, as they don’t owe me anything. I just feel embarrassed for actually sending them in the first place, maybe they were just trying to be polite and I was meant to read between the lines?

Or maybe I looked really cheeky actually sending them

I probably wouldn't have sent them. But as long as you don't follow it up then just move on.

I don’t know his parents personally so hopefully won’t see them around as they don’t live here. I feel really embarrassed now.

Just struggle with social cues sometimes and I suppose they were just trying to be polite but had no intention of actually gifting me

@Fizzysweets1- sorry but can it be a scam?

Are they possibly waiting til he’s recovered, they may be preoccupied if he’s in hospital etc. It’s a strange thing for them to have asked but you only did what they asked, in regards to a scan you can’t do a great deal with a sort code and account number - you have this info any time you get a cheque from someone

I think I would just do nothing. You would have satisfied their need at that moment to feel they could show their gratitude. Perhaps another family member rightly told them they don't need to reimburse you for your kindness.

I would have awkwardly handed over my details too though because it's natural to want to comfort distressed people with that they are asking for.

Yeah luckily they can’t do much with just acc number and sort code, I will just forget about it, it was probably just them trying to be polite and grateful in the moment but realised after they don’t need to. I thought they would send a fiver at most really for a box of chocolates or something.

You should keep an eye on your bank statements just in case. It's quite easy to set up a direct debit with just someone's name, bank account number and sort code. (They need the bank address too but you can find that online.)

They may have felt bad afterwards and reconsidered, realising they shouldn't have insisted! You've got nothing to feel embarrassed about. Well done for being there and helping

Ah no, thanks for alerting me to that.

It may have slipped their minds if they are occupied with caring for their son - or maybe they have had trouble sorting internet banking or need to wait for a pay day. Could be several reasons. Did you hand write your details and could they have misread a 1 for a 7 or something? Or was it typed?

But you did the right thing, both in helping their son and in answering their request to get your details. Even if they never send anything, there's nothing for you to be embarrassed about. You did what they asked.

Thank you! I’ll try not to feel embarrassed

You didn’t do a thing wrong. They’ve either forgotten in the stress or just not got round to it yet - either way you don’t need to be embarrassed, you just did what they asked when they put you on the spot.

Well done for saving his life, that's amazing! And no need to feel embarrassed about giving your bank details, you were only doing what they asked you to and you would probably have felt even more awkward if you'd said no but they'd kept on insisting. You haven't done anything wrong at all.

If you just leave it then there is nothing to be embarrassed about and loads of us might well have reacted exactly as you did.