Ex moving round the corner

[BeBe14]

5 months ago I found out my partner of 2 decades had been seeing someone else. I asked him to leave and bought him out of our family home. He has not spoken to me in person since. Everything around finances and children is carried out by text. He is often character assassinating in his texts and aggressive for no apparent reason. Few days ago he texted me to let me know he was planning to buy a house just round the corner. This is making me feel really uneasy. I do not react to his texts as he just sea to be wanting a fight that I don't want or need. Am I being unreasonable that I would like him to buy an alternative house in a different part of town so we don't have to pass each others habitat each time we go out. I really feel he is only doing it to make me unhappy....

Unfortunately, without legal recourse such as a molestation order, there is nothing you can do to stop him - he is free to buy a property wherever he likes.

Your options here I'm sorry to say are put up with it or move yourself.

Great - you will be able to share the care of the dc easier...

He might well be bull shitting just to piss you off. Hold tight and see if he actually does buy anything.

How old are the DC?

You cannot control where he lives so the best thing for you would be to try to see the positives of it. If he is nearby it makes seeing the DC easier?

To be honest you will probably hardly see him anyway.

Complaining that you will have to pass his house when you go out sounds quite petty. It's possibly a reaction to the stress you are still feeling from his communications. It sounds like you are doing the right thing by not biting. Keep comms to an absolute minimum around arrangements to see DC |(assuming they are younger and don't make their own plans to see him) and remember this will all be over as soon as they can make arrangements with him independently.

Unfortunately, as shit as it is, there's not much you can do. It's a dick move from him but it doesn't sound like we should expect anything less.

Hmm I would probably like this, easier to see the children but then my ex moved two hours away so when he was seeing them (he doesn’t bother now) it was too much of an inconvenience for him.

If you feel like he’s doing it to get at you, it probably won’t happen. It’s likely that he’s just saying it to get a reaction out of you. Don’t give him the satisfaction.

React completely opposite to what he wants.

I.e be positive about the move.... he might change his mind

How old are the DC?

I would agree with others react really positive about kids being able to pop and visit whenever they like. If he wants privacy this will not be a good option for him and he mar reconsider.

When i split with ex i was offered a house next street, oh great i thought it'll be like living in a goldfish bowl as all his family lived very close by.
It was in fact the opposite. I barely seen any of them except ex when handing over the dc.
I wouldn't fret too much.
It does help if you ban them from your house (ex family) and they stop speaking to you then they cross the street if you do see them lol.

@Muchmorethan

React completely opposite to what he wants.

I.e be positive about the move.... he might change his mind

Yeah agree with this actually, reverse psychology his ass, tell him how wonderful it will be for your kids, they'll be able to pop round to him whenever they want

I'm not surprised you are upset but there is nothing you can do about it. I have very little to do with people in the next street though so how intrusive it is depends on you, him and the area.

React in a positive way "the kids will love that" "it will be great for coparenting having you so close"

Ignore him being nasty he has to put on a show for his girlfriend or the "my ex was a vile bitch who did xyz" shit he tells people wouldn't work if he was actually talking to you like your a reasonable person

Just reply with an "OK" or "great, the kids can pop in whenever they like".

Also keep the move positive on written messages.... then you have written "proof" for whomever (i.e DC when older, Courts etc) ..that you have only ever encouraged a positive relationship and wasn't negative towards him...