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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

She doesn’t want to touch the ball-y’know, because of covid

320 replies

Thecarobsarefalling · 18/08/2021 10:21

We were at the beach last night with toddler Dd, she was happily running around the beach and fairly nearby was a family with two girls, maybe 8/9 years old.
Dd ran near to them (does this fairly frequently) to say hello/wanting to play. The older girl looked almost scared and backed away and said ‘I can’t’ we called Dd away as it felt like an awkward situation. The mum then cheerfully called to me that she probably didn’t want to touch the beach ball, because of covid. She then told her daughter she’d done the right thing. They left, saying a cheery goodbye and for us to enjoy our evening.
Aibu just to find this so very sad.

OP posts:
Neverrains · 18/08/2021 20:57

@deliciouschilli

Neverrains The OP's Title is "She doesn't want to touch the ball-y'know because of covid" It is a Very Goady title as many have pointed out. It insinuates that the other family were thick and over reacting, despite them being perfectly reasonable and polite. I have been in this position of having to politely decline and avoid contact with my child. It doesn't mean my child doesn't get to go on holiday, it doesn't mean our children look desperatley ill all the time. It's not even about COVID, my child would have to go into hospital and have anti-virals if she comes into contact with Chickenpox. I'm glad you have highlighted this as there are thousands of invisible children out there who's parents have no choice but to protect and really don't need to be made to feel stupid or bad for doing so.
Do we judge all posts by their title or do we actually read the OP and see what they’re actually saying? Like I said, you have no clue what we’ve been through. Only people I care about know anything about it. It’s perfectly possible to feel immense sympathy for those with vulnerable family members and also think it’s really fucking sad that some children are so affected by the restrictions. The OP hasn’t made anyone feel ‘stupid’ or ‘bad’. She’s expressed sadness at the situation.
Original poster
Thecarobsarefalling · 18/08/2021 21:06

The title isn’t goady!! The title is what the mum said to me! 🤷🏻‍♀️

OP posts:
deliciouschilli · 18/08/2021 21:19

Neverrains - Yes, of course, in that moment on the beach she felt Overwhelming sadness for our society... and the future of all our children had to express herself with a Goady thread on mumsnet...
She cannot believe a perfectly nice polite family wouldn't want the chance to play with her child....It can't be that they have a perfectly normal reason... It must be because they are thick and over-reacting!! The whole world must have gone mad. Sheilding children never leave the house...surely!! Sick children don't play on the beach....or go on holiday???? Children with anxiety and their parents should stay inside too??? I really thought that, as a society, we were past all this.

Peach01 · 18/08/2021 21:19

are still washing shopping
Still? I've always wiped shopping 😂 some sweaty ball toucher could've given it a good handle.

GintyMcGinty · 18/08/2021 21:21

@deliciouschilli you are just making stuff up now

deliciouschilli · 18/08/2021 21:27

GintyMcGinty? Not sure what you're on about? I'm a regular here, have been for years. ????

Neverrains · 18/08/2021 21:28

@deliciouschilli

Neverrains - Yes, of course, in that moment on the beach she felt Overwhelming sadness for our society... and the future of all our children had to express herself with a Goady thread on mumsnet... She cannot believe a perfectly nice polite family wouldn't want the chance to play with her child....It can't be that they have a perfectly normal reason... It must be because they are thick and over-reacting!! The whole world must have gone mad. Sheilding children never leave the house...surely!! Sick children don't play on the beach....or go on holiday???? Children with anxiety and their parents should stay inside too??? I really thought that, as a society, we were past all this.
Oh come on. She expressed sadness at a sad situation. It is sad. You’re being hysterical and making things up.
deliciouschilli · 18/08/2021 21:33

Neverrains I'm not "hysterical" (mysoginy at it's finest) I'm pointing out that there are many normal reasons that a child may not want to play ball with a toddler atm, the most obvious being health concerns that are perfectly legitimate and it's not up to you and OP to judge people for that. It's impossible to argue with ignorance.

saraclara · 18/08/2021 22:10

@deliciouschilli

Neverrains I'm not "hysterical" (mysoginy at it's finest) I'm pointing out that there are many normal reasons that a child may not want to play ball with a toddler atm, the most obvious being health concerns that are perfectly legitimate and it's not up to you and OP to judge people for that. It's impossible to argue with ignorance.
Except that the girls mother said it was because of covid.

And if anyone of the family was so vulnerable that touching a ball was a problem, it's highly unlikely that they'd have got in a plane with all the risk that involves and travelled abroad.

This would have been an interesting discussion if people had actually read the OP and OP's further posts, and were prepared to engage with the actual issue and not the ones that they've invented.

Original poster
Thecarobsarefalling · 18/08/2021 22:37

@saraclara It’s true, no interesting discussion can be had, people just want to argue or jump on things..or they don’t read through properly, or understand..I don’t know 🙈

OP posts:
loulous1985 · 19/08/2021 06:40

[quote Thecarobsarefalling]@saraclara Exactly! I was really wondering if so many are really not that bright to understand what I’m saying, either that or just deliberately wanting to argue and turn this into something it’s not. It’s frustrating.[/quote]

I suspect the latter

loulous1985 · 19/08/2021 06:44

@Thecarobsarefalling

The title isn’t goady!! The title is what the mum said to me! 🤷🏻‍♀️

Putting the title in quotation marks might have helped if that's the case. (Not that I felt it was goady anyway, but it might have helped your cause).

PrincessNutella · 19/08/2021 07:12

People are trying to balance being out in the world with staying away from each other as much as possible so that a highly transmissible virus doesn't spread. It isn't just the ball, it's the playing that could spread it. I know three vaccinated people who caught Covid in the last week.

EmeraldShamrock · 19/08/2021 09:03

Let's hope next summer is a lot less stressful and restrictive for the DC.

luckylavender · 19/08/2021 10:53

The OP desperately pretending that it's others who are goady & judgemental...

Bryonyshcmyony · 19/08/2021 11:02

She's not desperately pretending anything. It's clear as day that posters are wilfully misinterpreting it to have a go.

loulous1985 · 19/08/2021 11:58

@Bryonyshcmyony

She's not desperately pretending anything. It's clear as day that posters are wilfully misinterpreting it to have a go.
Agreed
Acqua32 · 19/08/2021 12:03

@BogRollBOGOF

It's very sad that children have been indoctrinated to fear normal interactions and it will have a long term cost in society.

The chances of catching Covid from touching a beach ball are so low as to be negligable.

This.

It’s so sad OP I agree with you

saraclara · 19/08/2021 12:16

@luckylavender

The OP desperately pretending that it's others who are goady & judgemental...
Rubbish. The OP is absolutely clear. I've read it and re-read it to try and work out where all these horrible posts are coming from, and there really is nothing justifying the spite around here. OP's point is absolutely clear.
EmeraldShamrock · 19/08/2021 12:43

"It's very sad that children have been indoctrinated to fear normal interactions and it will have a long term cost in society."
It really is.

loulous1985 · 19/08/2021 15:28

The OP is absolutely clear. I've read it and re-read it to try and work out where all these horrible posts are coming from, and there really is nothing justifying the spite around here.

Same.

GintyMcGinty · 19/08/2021 16:32

The OP is absolutely clear. I've read it and re-read it to try and work out where all these horrible posts are coming from, and there really is nothing justifying the spite around here.

Ditto

RobinPenguins · 19/08/2021 17:09

The OP is absolutely clear. I've read it and re-read it to try and work out where all these horrible posts are coming from, and there really is nothing justifying the spite around here.

Ditto again. There’s some serious reaching going on. Hmm

duffeldaisy · 19/08/2021 17:26

"It's very sad that children have been indoctrinated to fear normal interactions and it will have a long term cost in society."

It's not normal.
It's like saying that it's such a shame that children are being taught to fear roads, when the road in question is a motorway. And normally it's a cul-de-sac.

We're in a pandemic. Being careful about interaction during these highly unusual times isn't overreacting. It's not going to damage children for life. Once this all dies down a bit and becomes less risky then they'll interact as normal again.
There are currently 34,000+ children suffering from symptoms of long Covid at the moment. Cases and deaths are rising and they're not even back at school yet. There's going to be a whole spectrum of reactions, and limiting interaction is within that, not some bizarre outlying behaviour.

Mollymoostoo · 19/08/2021 17:50

Schools have drummed it into children so much that they will find it very hard to adjust to what life was pre covid.
It is sad but also expected. I have a colleague who still wears gloves and puts all paperwork in a bin bag, I tried to tell her that she is still spreading germs with her gloved hands unless she washes them too. Hmm