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AIBU?

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Original poster

How to move abroad

60 replies

CtrlU · 17/08/2021 23:22

Long time lurker and answered but haven’t posted yet so please forgive me if this is in the wrong section

Ive always dreamt of living abroad for a year or two since I was a child and slowly as I’ve gotten older; the prospect fades but my passion for this experience lingers. I’ve recently hit a milestone birthday and Ive reminded myself that life is too short and I want to live it the best way I can.

I would like to live abroad for a few years. Ideally between 2-5 years (or maybe even longer if it works out) and whilst I’m sure it will take a lot of getting used to and most likely a lot of hard work; I still want to try. My problem is I have absolutely no idea where to start. What is the procedure to get started? I think I honestly haven’t done it yet because I don’t know HOW to do it and feel it may be out of reach but I would like to try.

I was born in the UK with most of my family being UK residents. I have some family members who live abroad but I would ideally like to go to a totally new place I haven’t been before. I have a trade job (think hair and beauty) but I’m unsure if it’s enough to get me by in another country. I am also open to working in an unrelated job if I could get one that would cover living expenses - but again; I have no idea where to start.

I’m 20 something with 1 child (who would be coming with me)

Thanks

OP posts:
Kitty2019 · 18/08/2021 13:35

And it's super expensive for rent and schools

PotteringAlong · 18/08/2021 13:38

Also, will your child’s father agree to them moving abroad? It’s a non-starter if not.

akpounce · 18/08/2021 13:39

Join the expat group on Facebook called Two Fat Expats. You will find SO much information there of which countries are easier to go to than others and anything else you might wonder.

firstmentat · 18/08/2021 13:45

I wouldn't include Dubai as not easy to get visa for child as a single parent and working hours in hair and beauty are long.
Yes, true. I was just throwing it here, as we don't really know OP's situation other than she wants to move.
Hair and beauty is one of the industries where it is easy to sell the "nostalgia" feeling at a premium to the expat community. My hair (both hair-hair and hair removal), manicure / pedicure, brow/lash tints, facials are all done by women from my own culture. Most of them have very basic English (so would never cut it in a beauty salon as an employee), but their rates are quite comparable to salon ones. I am going there exactly because we can chat in our own language (and of course because they are doing a great job too).

garlictwist · 18/08/2021 13:58

It's such a shame Brexit has happened - in my twenties I just randomly moved to different places in Europe just because I could and did any old job. In big cities you often don't even need to know much of the local language if you are an English speaker.

It's a lot harder now.

2bazookas · 18/08/2021 14:01

Moving to another country, another culture, among strangers, would mean you had to be able to stand on your own two feet from day one. Be able to think, plan, choose, decide, adapt and improvise all by yourself with no back-up.

The fact you can't even manage to think of basic questions by yourself, and are relying on strangers to do the ground work for you, strongly suggests you don't have the necessary mindset .

IceandIndigo · 18/08/2021 14:29

I find it quite odd that you say you have some family members living abroad but want to go to a totally different place that you've never been to before. I can't really understand the motivation for this. As someone who has been through the emigration experience, I think it's absolutely essential to have visited a place to know if it's somewhere you could live. I also think that having friends or family in the place you're moving to is a great advantage, because it gives you a support network. If I were you I would personally be starting with places where you have family and friends and some level of familiarity with the place.

If you feel like you want to move somewhere to challenge yourself or because you need a fresh start I would perhaps consider other ways to achieve that - maybe a within country move. If you didn't have a child I would definitely suggest a working holiday rather than a permanent move. With a child the stakes are higher because you need to achieve a certain standard of living to support them, and you need to think about things like schools and healthcare. I don't think I would consider moving with a child unless I had a job and accommodation sorted out before I left.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 18/08/2021 14:35

As someone who has been through the emigration experience, I think it's absolutely essential to have visited a place to know if it's somewhere you could live.

I personally don't think it is, IF there are no children in play. Which in this case there is. It's much easier to move if you don't like it somewhere when you don't have to consider a dependant

Rosiiiiie · 18/08/2021 14:37

Australia and NZ would be completely off your list atm because of covid.
As others mentioned, why not consider an EU country with a high expat population?

I’d absolutely love to move to Dubai but rent prices are very high and I certainly wouldn’t move there as a single mum.

I’m not familiar with Canada at all but a friend moved there last year and loves it!

What about Ireland? Somewhere close to home?

JSL52 · 18/08/2021 14:47

What support do you have as a single parent now ?
You'd have none of that abroad.
As others have said would the father agree ?

KaptainKaveman · 18/08/2021 14:50

Are you fully vaccinated OP?

KaptainKaveman · 18/08/2021 14:52

Without wishing to pour cold water on your 'dream', you do come across as someone who is not at all aware of what's involved. You don't even know which continent you want, let alone which country.

SoreusBacchus · 18/08/2021 14:54

You have a trade job but do you have any qualifications?
Do you speak any languages? (guessing no as you would likely have mentioned).
How old is the child and do you have consent for them to move?

I would think that your chances of a visa to any english speaking country without strong qualifications in a wanted industry, and as a single parent, would be remote.

You could move to Ireland, that's a different country.

flyingant · 18/08/2021 15:20

You could train to be a teacher. Lots of jobs available at international schools all over the world: www.tes.com/jobs/browse/international

SharpLily · 18/08/2021 15:21

Some people here seem not to have noticed that Brexit has happened. You can no longer simply live and work in other EU countries. There are visa requirements which in some countries, Spain for example, the OP is very, very unlikely to meet.

MauveMagnolia · 18/08/2021 15:22

[quote flyingant]You could train to be a teacher. Lots of jobs available at international schools all over the world: www.tes.com/jobs/browse/international[/quote]
Unless the Op has a degree that is a 7 year route

SharpLily · 18/08/2021 15:23

[quote CtrlU]@HerRoyalNotness Canada has been a place I have almost decided on as I know friends and family who have been and lived it and said it was very similar to the UK.

I think I will start here. Thank you[/quote]
I don't mean to be rude but you are apparently planning a big adventure, to the point of trying to move somewhere you have never even visited, yet you are tempted by the places most similar to the UK? I'm a bit lost here.

Dancingonmoonlight · 18/08/2021 15:25

Instead of posting here and hearing from people that your dream is a fantasy etc, it’s probably better to post on an expat forum and learn from people who have done it.

I wouldn’t worry about returning. You may find you never even want to once you have experienced a new country.

flyingant · 18/08/2021 15:55

@MauveMagnolia the OP hasn't said whether she has a degree or not. Even if not, then training to teach only takes 3 or 4 years. She's only in her twenties and hasn't given a timeframe. It might not be ideal if she wants to move abroad right now, but teaching is still a very viable option.

myotherusernameistaken · 18/08/2021 16:01

@SharpLily

Some people here seem not to have noticed that Brexit has happened. You can no longer simply live and work in other EU countries. There are visa requirements which in some countries, Spain for example, the OP is very, very unlikely to meet.
You beat me to it.

We live in France, and have done for a number of years.

Pre-brexit it was fine to just come here, buy a house and then register for tax, health care etc etc.

If you are not currently a French resident with a carte de sejour and you come here now from the UK, unless you have a visa you can only stay for 90 days out of any 180 day period and yes, they will most definitely stamp your passport so that there is a record of this.

Anonymous48 · 18/08/2021 16:04

I wish you all the best of luck, but I think perhaps that this might be unrealistic at this stage of your life. The time to seriously consider it might have been before you had a child. There's no harm in doing the research but you might have to come to terms with the fact that it's not going to happen, and start to examine what it is you are hoping to achieve by moving abroad or what is missing in your current life, and see if you can address those issues in a different way.

Ducksarenotmyfriends · 18/08/2021 16:06

Do you even know which country you want to go to? Have you tried going on holiday there first?

SoreusBacchus · 18/08/2021 16:07

MauveMagnolia the OP hasn't said whether she has a degree or not. Even if not, then training to teach only takes 3 or 4 years

No degree to teaching in three years? Come on.

TakeYourFinalPosition · 18/08/2021 16:10

Some people here seem not to have noticed that Brexit has happened. You can no longer simply live and work in other EU countries. There are visa requirements which in some countries, Spain for example, the OP is very, very unlikely to meet.

This. We're in the visa process for Spain, and I've lived there before, and meet the income requirements. Unless you've got 500,000 euros for a golden visa; it's now a nightmare. Not impossible, but not easy, and realistically most people won't meet the criteria.

It's definitely not as easy as it used to be.

lastqueenofscotland · 18/08/2021 16:12

Honestly unless you are in certain construction, engineering or clinical roles it’s not going to be a case of pick where you fancy.
You’ll need to really research, probably pick a country and aim to meet their criteria.
There is often a high minimum income requirement and free at point of access healthcare is very unusual outside of the U.K., and often work based health insurance cover won’t kick in until after 90 days. Which is something I’d think very carefully about if you are taking a small child.

Also the costs of moving are extortionate. I lived in Hong Kong for a time and just setting up out there was £££££ even with a well paid job and (for HK standards) cheap accommodation.