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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

7 year old daughter having tik tok

25 replies

whatwouldjudydo · 16/08/2021 20:40

Daughter has been away with ex and has come back with a tik tok account he's set up for her she's posted a few videos of her on holiday. There are no security settings enabled AIBU to delete it? We've had tears and tantrums today at the mere mention of it and once again I am the bad cop...

OP posts:
SmallGreenStripes · 16/08/2021 20:42

Yanbu

Kittii · 16/08/2021 20:42

YANBU

00100001 · 16/08/2021 20:43

Well. Presumably the father has just as much say as you do about these things.

For now, make it a private account. Check who she's friends with and discuss it with the father.

mogtheexcellent · 16/08/2021 20:43

YANBU. Your ex is a tool.

MrsSkylerWhite · 16/08/2021 20:43

YA most definitely NBU.
You would BU not to.

Summer20twentyone · 16/08/2021 20:44

You can add parental controls to safeguard the videos she posts, I would be more concerned about the content she will scroll through on the FYP (for you page) it's random what pops up and can vary from sexually explicit to suspected sexual offenders to talk of ED and SH.

I wouldn't let a 7 year old go on TT unsupervised.

plodalong12 · 16/08/2021 20:44

Delete it. Straight away.
It was that app that was doing the round in the news a few months ago where unsuspecting users were shown a video of a man shot himself in the head. I’m sure there was a thread about it on here and lots of people said their children had seen it and were extremely upset and disturbed by it.

Reb24934 · 16/08/2021 20:45

YANBU

Saidtoomuch · 16/08/2021 20:45

No, you aren't at all unreasonable. I don't know much about tiktok and how suitable it is for young kids, but can you make it safe by setting up security settings? Its a different world now, especially since lockdown, even homework is ap based.

SparklingLime · 16/08/2021 20:46

It’s against TikTok’s terms and conditions so you are totally within your rights to delete it. Minimum age: 13.

DeflatedGinDrinker · 16/08/2021 20:46

Yanbu wtf is wrong with the other parent?! Parenting fail. Atleast she has you OP don't feel bad for being bad cop she will know when she is older who was a parent and who was disneyland parent.

CherieBabySpliffUp · 16/08/2021 20:47

Definitely delete it. I'm pretty sure that the minimum age for it is 13 like other social media apps. I've come across a couple of accounts on the FYP which are obviously child accounts so have reported them.

Whatafustercluck · 16/08/2021 20:47

Yanbu. 10yo ds keeps pestering us for Tik Tok and there's absolutely no way it's appropriate for him at 10 or your dd at 7.

SparklingLime · 16/08/2021 20:47

Report underage user here: www.tiktok.com/legal/report/privacy?lang=en

MadeOfStarStuff · 16/08/2021 20:50

YANBU

Seven year olds shouldn’t ever have unsupervised online access and definitely shouldn’t be on TikTok where it’s so easy to stumble across something they’re much too young for.

Her dad is a tool. Delete the app and her account. Make sure she knows what to do if she ever finds something online (TikTok or anywhere else) that makes her uncomfortable or scared, and that you won’t be mad at her about it.

pollylocketpickedapocket · 16/08/2021 20:50

Dreadful behaviour from your ex. We should protect our children from sm for as long as possible, not hand it on a plate at 7!

Colinthecucumber · 16/08/2021 20:51

Absolutely delete it. Tiktok has some incredibly toxic content. I’ve also seen teenage users being pretty horrid to younger children who are on there. 7 is a good 4 or 5 years too young to even think about having it.

Makesmilingyourbesthobby · 16/08/2021 20:57

I would definitely delete account/report at this age for Tik tok or at the very least depending on the individual child trust/responsible/understanding etc delete app from her phone/tablet make it a private account deleting any followers she may already have that is not family friends and putting the app on your phone which she can use when you are in same room with her and have a good chat with DD about internet safety and a chat with her father if on good terms to see if he’s on board with doing the same thing with app on his phone/him in room when DD is with him and changing password so only you and her father know it and she does not.
My DD is 13 and has a private tik tok account and makes videos put doesn’t publish them when she’s competed making them so they all there for her to view in drafts but no one else can view them.

Original poster
whatwouldjudydo · 16/08/2021 21:29

It's what she will see on there that worries me the most, I do have it and it's very sexualised on there, lots of adult themes and although I can add controls it still worries me as they can still be tagged etc. My 12 year old DS has it and has had a horrible message on there before however he is old enough and savvy enough to talk to me about it and deal with it and doesn't post videos of himself only gaming montages and I access it and he shows me what he's posting before he does. 7 year old DD doesn't have this understanding and isn't mature enough I've only just started letting her on kids tube!

OP posts:
Figgygal · 16/08/2021 21:30

Absolutely delete it - she’s far too young

Darbs76 · 16/08/2021 21:35

Absolutely delete it. 7yrs old? Just no

Blueskytoday06 · 16/08/2021 21:38

Ooohhhhh no no no. Tiktok is definitely NOT appropriate for a 7 year old. My DD 14 has it and I'm not happy about some of the stuff on there that she sees!! What was he thinking ?!?!

Catawaul · 16/08/2021 21:40

Definitely delete it. I love tiktok but it's not suitable for little kids.

mnahmnah · 16/08/2021 21:41

My 9 yo has never heard of tik tok. Not sure they even know what social media is

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