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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not always want to sit in the back of the car?

46 replies

CookieCrunch123 · 15/08/2021 15:12

My DH has moved DC1s car seat into the front passenger seat of the car which I didn’t have a problem with, as when it’s just the 2 of them they prefer it like that. However, when we go on a family day out now they don’t want to move DC1s seat so I have to sit in the back of the car all the time now. I know they’ll both kick off if I move the seat so l honestly don’t know if AIBU here. It was okay for the odd trip here and there but now it’s become a permanent thing, AIBU to move the car seat and sit in the front passenger seat of the car?

OP posts:
LifesNotEnidBlyton · 15/08/2021 16:10

YANBU. Ffs there has to be some good bits to being an adult, and having more leg room for your adult body should be one. It sounds like your DH and DS are having an intimate talk and you're just the poor extra who's coming too. Your DH should want to sit with you, and your DS shouldn't get to see his dad pushing his mum out so he can sit wherever he wants

LifesNotEnidBlyton · 15/08/2021 16:10

.

JSL52 · 15/08/2021 16:15

[quote CookieCrunch123]@MiloAndEddie DC wouldn’t get his own way on his own but if he has DHs agreement it’s a bit harder work for me. I’m going start driving and we’ll see how long DH sits in the back for![/quote]
Good !

Chloemol · 15/08/2021 16:31

Just move the seat if they complain tell them tough you are not sitting in the back

notacooldad · 15/08/2021 16:40

Just move the seat if they complain tell them tough you are not sitting in the back
It shouldn't even be up for discussion. Madness.

billy1966 · 15/08/2021 16:42

Let them go out together.

You have a long hard 15 years ahead of you if you accept guff like this from either of them.

MeridianB · 15/08/2021 17:10

YADNBU here. Children much safer in the back. There is no reason for your DC to be in the front ever.

Does your DH disable air bag in front passenger seat every time he takes DC in front on his own?

sashagabadon · 15/08/2021 17:13

That’s crazy! Sit in the front as the adult. Or better still drive and let your dh sit in the back. With a car seat in the front he’ll have no leg room at all.

Lulu1919 · 15/08/2021 17:14

Anyway a booster style seat with car belt can be moved in seconds

Foobydoo · 15/08/2021 17:17

@CookieCrunch123

Does anyone have a link to info about children not sitting in the front seat? I’ve only ever seen info about not putting rear facing car seats in the front seat. But even then it said you could do it if you turn the airbag off. DC1 is forward facin in a high back booster seat with the car seat belt.
A fireman I know was badly affected after attending what should have been a minor traffic accident in which a 4 year old child died. He was sat in the front on a booster and the airbag deployed and killed him. I never let dd2 sit in the front and she is 9.
InSpaceNooneCanHearYouScream · 16/08/2021 10:42

@billy1966

Let them go out together.

You have a long hard 15 years ahead of you if you accept guff like this from either of them.

What, so OP has to stay at home just because daddy can't tell the kid he has to sit in the back?? Fuck that shit
ApolloandDaphne · 16/08/2021 10:48

Explain to your DC that when they go out with their DF they can have their seat in the front but when you all go out together it has to move because you are an adult and they do not get to call the shots. Then speak to your DH and make sure he understands that you both need to be on the same page regarding this as it is not acceptable to you that you should sit in the back seat. If he doesn't agree then I would question this relationship. Is he generally own the same page as you with regards to parenting?

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 16/08/2021 10:53

It takes seconds to move a seat. We do it regularly since we've got a travel sick child who needs the front on long journeys.

Sitting in the front due to demands... no way. Only if there is good reason.

ineedaholidaynow · 16/08/2021 10:56

How old is DC1?

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 16/08/2021 11:02

www.childcarseats.org.uk/types-of-seat/booster-seats/

It says on here that it’s safer to have the seat in the back due to the air bag.

My DD1 is 7 and has never sat in the front of the car. She doesn’t argue about it because she knows that’s the rule and we are all on the same page about it. DH would never boot me to the back so she could sit in the front.

SallyDontTouchThatPie · 16/08/2021 11:07

Ds is 15 and he still gets into the back seat of the car even when it is just me and him! It is just habit and safer.

A child in a car seat really should be in the back seat of the car for safety reasons. The links have been provided above.

SallyDontTouchThatPie · 16/08/2021 11:08

I should have said that even if my front passenger seat was empty both children sat in the back of the car. It is the safest place.

Palavah · 16/08/2021 11:12

Why don't you share the driving normally?

EL8888 · 16/08/2021 11:31

Zero chance of me sitting in the back, even before taking my travel sickness and longer legs into account. I wouldn’t even enter into a debate. Yep l can see why l don’t date men with children.

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 16/08/2021 11:39

@Palavah

Why don't you share the driving normally?
I drive 99% of the time. I get incredibly anxious when I’m a passenger and also a bit travel sick.

Not every couple shares the driving for all sorts of valid reasons.

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