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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Do I approach this with neighbour?

30 replies

Ofalltheginjoints · 14/08/2021 20:35

I bought my house in January 2020 and originally lived here with ex DP however he moved out in April after our relationship ended, the house was only ever in my name which made things much easier, I bought the house from my uncle but at market value.

Several weeks ago my neighbour across the road got a taxi and told the taxi driver that my ex partner had "done a bunk" and asked about the rent that I was paying, taxi driver was a close friend of my aunt and uncle and told her that I had bought the house.

Tonight, whilst tidying my front garden, I had a couple stop and approach me about when the house would be going on the rental market as they know my partner has left and obviously I don't a 3 bedroom house, they were quite put out and didn't initially believe me that the house was mine, asking what the rental price was, I clearly resolved that with them however this could only have come from the neighbour across the street.

Do I discuss this with her? Right now I feel furious so no calm discussion would be had tonight (and to be fair she is usually goes to bed around time as she's told me before, she's in her 80's) but tomorrow?

I hate feeling the subject of gossip (and this isn't the first time from her, she broadcast the end of my relationship to the street but I did tell her when she asked) although if this did come from her I'm guessing she'll find out soon enough?

OP posts:

RandomMess · 14/08/2021 20:40

Don't let it get to you. We live in a street of many retired people - any news is shared 😂

PenguinEgg · 14/08/2021 20:45

I would hate this too but she sounds the sort that will gossip whatever you say. I would just imply that she was a gossipy person who makes stuff up when it comes up with other people and dismiss people who are rude and nosy about your circumstances, you don't owe them an explanation. If you speak to her and let her gain information from her tactic of spreading whatever she thinks is happening she could just do this every time she's bored and fancies stirring and finding things out.

lannistunut · 14/08/2021 20:47

I would just ignore, what difference does it make if people think you rent?

I would just take any opportunity to remind people they can't rely on gossip.

Thelnebriati · 14/08/2021 20:47

I wouldn't bother, people like that are just as happy to start a feud as embroil you in gossip.

Next time someone repeats something she's said, just roll your eyes and say 'its just idle gossip, there's no truth in it'.

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 14/08/2021 20:52

I would ignore it. Don't engage with the neighbour other than being civil. I wouldn't explain myself to random in the street either, simple 'it's not for rent ' will suffice.

burritofan · 14/08/2021 20:59

I’d have fun with it: loud conversations on the phone whenever she’s listening with your “landlord” about the bargain rent and lifetime tenancy you enjoy; get a mate to come to the door and hand them a thick brown envelope of “cash” with a big wink. Big sign in the window “no vacancies”; sigh sorrowfully and often and wonder out loud, “When will my ex-DP come home from war”. Put a rumour out that you’re a lottery winner but you’re staying in this house to stay humble though you could afford to buy the whole street.

rosesinmygarden · 14/08/2021 20:59

Our neighbour hates us because we had building work done. She's never forgiven us and has told everyone in our village that we only bought the house to 'flip it' and make as much money as impossible before moving the moment it was finished. My personal opinion is that she's either just nasty, or she's jealous. She looks a bit stupid 5 years down the line.

The best thing you can say is, "I'm not sure who told you that as it's totally untrue. How odd! I wonder why anyone would tell such a strange lie..."

beigebrownblue · 14/08/2021 20:59

If you dare, I would have great fun making up fake bits of news.

Example: you've just gone self employed and think that your new escort agency will go down a storm.

30degreesandmeltinghere · 14/08/2021 21:00

Tell your nosey neighbour you are renting the spare rooms out to rehabilitated offenders.... And does she want to buy a duster?

rubbletrouble · 14/08/2021 21:07

I think if she's in her 80s, she isn't going to change anytime soon and it hardly worst neighbour in the world having a gossip, yes it could be annoying but not sure I would ever consider pulling her up on it, mostly based on her age and the fact it is not exactly malicious or cruel gossip about you.

godmum56 · 14/08/2021 21:07

I used to be the gossiped about one where I live and i know who did the gossiping.....honestly ignore it. keep yourself to yourself, don't answer questions just smile and walk away.

godmum56 · 14/08/2021 21:10

ps i think the "rental couple" are a pair of CF's but if it happens again just don't answer...walk away.

Original poster

Ofalltheginjoints · 14/08/2021 21:12

Thanks everyone, I'm not bothered if people think I rent it's more that my house is up for grabs and I am the victim of a partner who did a bunk, nothing could be further from the truth.

I will igone her and keep things civil it just annoys me so much that she says these things, still at least if she's talking about me she's leaving other people alone?

Love the ideas about giving her something to talk about, I may invite all my male friends around at separate intervals!
Seriously tho she has always been nice to my face, taking in parcels etc.... I'd rather she just asked me rather then gossiping

OP posts:

aiwblam · 14/08/2021 21:13

Ignore the idiot neighbour.

godmum56 · 14/08/2021 21:14

@Ofalltheginjoints

Thanks everyone, I'm not bothered if people think I rent it's more that my house is up for grabs and I am the victim of a partner who did a bunk, nothing could be further from the truth.

I will igone her and keep things civil it just annoys me so much that she says these things, still at least if she's talking about me she's leaving other people alone?

but asking you and getting the truth would be no fun for her.

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 14/08/2021 21:15

Pay £3 to get the title deeds with your name on, print it off and post it through her letterbox with "FYI" written on it

SchrodingersImmigrant · 14/08/2021 21:16

Ignore it. But not because she is 80 something... Age is no excuse for beinga dick. It's not worth it. It is pretty insulting to automate assume you can't own house without the guy🙄 But not worth the aggro

annacondom · 14/08/2021 21:22

Yes, she's made huge assumptions, and got it wrong. Hopefully the rental couple will tell her. I wouldn't mention it. If she brings it up you could put her straight, but otherwise, ignore it.

Boredmotherofone · 14/08/2021 21:23

@FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop

Pay £3 to get the title deeds with your name on, print it off and post it through her letterbox with "FYI" written on it

THIS! Make her realise how wrong she is and how disgusting her baseless gossiping was. Perhaps it will stop her in future

user1471538283 · 14/08/2021 21:26

Ignore her. I lived next to neighbors who were desperate to know my business and it appears wanted me to know theirs including how much they earned and where they had been on holiday. I told them nothing. Neighbors are not friends.

RandomMess · 14/08/2021 21:27

I was coming back to say spread a false rumour 😂 you've beaten me to it with invite a string of male mates around to visit.

You could put a red bulb in the front bedroom too...

bananacrumble · 14/08/2021 21:29

I'd try to let it "slip" your 2 empty rooms are red rooms and people can rent hourly... see the responses she gets when she tells people !!! Do it to your entertainment

JayniSummers · 14/08/2021 21:36

I'm afraid I'd see this as a great opportunity for mischief. I'd tell them some AMAZING stories . " ah yes the house is up for rent but we are struggle getting tenants to move in because of the body they found in the garden " ..." Mt sugar daddy bought me the house , I'm so lucky " ' I won't the Romanian lottery , I own it outright "

JayniSummers · 14/08/2021 21:37

@bananacrumble

I'd try to let it "slip" your 2 empty rooms are red rooms and people can rent hourly... see the responses she gets when she tells people !!! Do it to your entertainment

This ...100% this

CommanderBurnham · 14/08/2021 21:42

It's village life at its finest. Try to ignore, as the neighbour is now looking like a fool

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