To just remove this old friend from social media?

[Pulsr]

Met as children when she moved in next door and were good friends ever since, we're both now 27-30.

I moved to a different city a few years ago so we haven't seen one another in person since then.

We've caught up online once in a blue moon since but I've realised that the last few messages I sent her she left on read and didn't reply.

I reached out to her yesterday to ask for her advice on something quite sensitive as I'm pregnant and not in a good place, I know she has been there herself and as I'd supported her in the past I felt she was a safe person to broach it with.

She read the message and ignored it like the two previous. The two previous messages being just me asking how she was and asking after her DC.

I'm left feeling a bit shit because of the sensitive nature of the message and wish I hadn't have bothered.

It's clear she has no interest in maintaining the friendship so WIBU (or dramatic) to just remove her from social media now?

I see no point in having people on there to see my updates if they can't be bothered to reply once in a while. I think it's a bit rude.

I would send another message saying "you're not ghosting me are you? "

So many reasons people don't respond. Not always about the sender.

First of all and I hope there is someone you can talk to about whatever is going on. Second i would maybe give her a few more days in case she is just rubbish at replying or caught up in something personal and then delete her of still no answer. I took the birth of my child as a good excuse to go on a social media clear out, said it was to protect my child's privacy, but also meant I could delete all the old colleagues/ex friends etc.

Just delete her, she's fucking rude.

Delete and think no more about it; you don’t need ‘friends’ like this.

Depends what you want to use FB (assuming that’s what you’re talking about -?) for - if you just want to keep connections alive, no problem having ‘friends’ who don’t communicate. Although ultimately you can have whoever you want on there, obvs. This person doesn’t sound like someone to turn to as a friend via social media so maybe don’t do that anymore for now.

I'm feeling a bit depressed so I'm alot more sensitive than usual, wasn't sure whether I was over reacting to want to just remove her now or not.

I don't actually have any friends where I live so perhaps put a higher value on 'old friends' than somebody else, with proper friends now, would have done.

I tried not to take it personally the last two times but by the third occasion of being blanked it just spells "I can't be bothered with you" to me.

I’d wait a couple of days then delete.

I think that's what I'll do.

I know people aren't obliged to respond to somebody but I think after knowing somebody 20 odd years the very least you can do is be polite.

Even if just to say it's not a good time or whatever else.

Hope you are ok. Would the conversation also be sensitive to her? Sometimes you don’t know what is going on in other people’s lives. In honesty I’d feel somewhat burdened if someone I exchanged messages with once in a blue moon shared sensitive messages. It would have nothing to do with them, but just I don’t have the emotional capacity at the moment. I’d personally be kind to her and yourself.

I think that's really rude of her, but I've had friends do this, and it's not always to do with you. Sometimes people are busy and don't realise it's rude or hurtful to read a message and not reply.

Can you maybe restrict her access to your profile for now, so she doesn't see your updates? That's not permanent so you can always undo later if your friendship revives.

I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of deleting her. I'm sure there's a way you can remain FB friends but hide your content from her, and you can hide hers.

Although actually maybe just deleting would be fine too.

Either way, just forget about her and look after yourself. I hope you have someone else you can turn to x

It wasn't anything too deep what I sent her, I just asked for her experience of a specific SSRI antidepressant that I knew she had taken a few years ago, because I'm about to start on it. I wasn't emotive and needy.. Quite breezy but said I'd really appreciate her perspective. Crickets.

I'd give her a few days, especially if she's got young children. It sometimes takes me a couple of days to get around to replying to messages. If still no reply, then remove her.

I hope you're ok OP, consider a name change if it suits and posting for advice and support on here. You've already had better responses than from your old friend.

Regardless of time or whatever else is going on in her life, she's rude. I'd mute her at least and then delete her details. I've got friends I haven't seen in person for years and years, but we still reconnect by phone, whatsapp and very, very occasionally in person when we could. If you want to, you make time and put in the effort.

She may have a lot going on and not be in a position to reply, but a holding message or acknowledgement would be better than nothing. It seems like she is probably making her feelings known by her silence.

She's been posting to Facebook since i messaged and went live this morning showing her DS doing something funny, so she is quite active iykwim.

I know that doesn't mean much in the grand scheme of things, just a bit hurtful when you've been blanked.

All said and done it's my own issue and I should probably focus on making some new friends rather than hanging on to old ones that I won't see anytime soon.

Hope u ok op. Yes I try and have a few friends. Had a few flaky ones they deleted off my list. Sick chasing people !

Do you have friends in common or are you likely to cross paths with her again? If no then I would get rid of her on social media. I'd give her two days to reply then delete the message and delete her.