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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To cancel the swimming lessons

108 replies

HungryHippo11 · 14/08/2021 05:08

My DD is 4.5 and is a complete beginner at swimming - we have only been about 4 times in the past year due to pool closures etc. An opportunity came up for a week of reduced swimming lessons at a local private pool, so I booked her on. Website said that parents could watch from the poolside.

I phoned yesterday to check the details such as what to bring along, because I hadn't had any confirmation email or anything. Apparently due to covid, parents aren't allowed poolside, or in to the building at all, and have to drop the kids off at the entrance swim ready and pick them up an hour later.

WWYD? My instinct is to cancel the lessons - I don't think I'm OK with sending a young child into a place she has never been, with instructors neither of us have ever met, to do a potentially dangerous activity at which she is a complete beginner.
BUT I think the swimming will be a really good thing for her to start learning as she has been so little and its a life skill.

Am I overreacting? I know kids swimming lessons the parents aren't usually in the water but they would at least be in the same building?

OP posts:

PumpkinPie2016 · 14/08/2021 07:50

YANBU I would cancel and let them know why.

I took DS to a family swim the other day and everything is normal.

He has lessons at a local, private pool and again, everything is normal and his instructor gets in the pool with him sometimes.

He is more advanced in swimming than your daughter (but he is 7) but I wouldn't want to send him into a leisure centre alone. Largely because he would likely leave his trunks/goggles behind!

Vallmo47 · 14/08/2021 08:05

My 9 year old takes swimming lessons and it’s true that there were massive restrictions in place due to covid. Child had to come in swim ready (changing rooms were closed), there was a one-way system, child had to walk in through emergency pool access way alone, parents weren’t allowed to stay inside and watch but had to sit outside on the ground in any weather (during winter months this was fab as I don’t drive). The staff communicated very badly and never told you what happened in lessons or how child was getting on, also couldn’t tell you who teacher was all of the time “due to covid changes”. It wasn’t great for me at all but my child loves swimming and is confident in water and THAT’S the clincher for me.
I do agree an hour is too long and I would not be comfortable in your situation.

Furthermore- “freedom day” has now come and gone so the following has happened:

Changing rooms and showers are now open.
You are allowed to wait in the building and watch the lessons in viewing area.

Why are things not changing at your centre? I would have to question it.

Good luck!

newnortherner111 · 14/08/2021 08:16

I would not be concerned about the swimming instructors, but not being able to be in the building at all would mean I would cancel. Though you should 100% say why.

CakeandGo · 14/08/2021 08:22

I would cancel.
Part of the joy of the lessons is being able to watch and see how they do, isn’t it? For parents I mean.
I have fond memories of seeing my DC do their first few lessons or jump in from the side by themselves for the first time or their first width or master floating etc etc.

RubertRoo · 14/08/2021 08:22

My 3 year old DDs lessons are like this and work really well. I drop her at the door and she goes in and I go back and sit in the car. If she needs rhe toilet they ring me and I go in to her to help her.
Then 5 mins before the lesson ends I go in and wait in whichever changing room she'll end up in, then help her dry get changed and leave.
I think it works really well!

Lockdownbear · 14/08/2021 08:26

Part of the joy of the lessons is being able to watch and see how they do, isn’t it? For parents I mean

I don't know that should enter the equation. Where I am it's very difficult to get kids into lessons, reduced capacity, pools not fully open. I'm half convinced that covid is a convience excuse for council cut backs.

However i believe all kids should learn to swim and sooner they star the better.

Wynston · 14/08/2021 08:28

My dc did an intensive swim week this summer. Similar set up as in pool ready had to wear boyance aid as the instructor wasn't allowed in the pool.
I was lucky in the sense eldest dc can swim and I felt happier with both mine in together.
I knew the instructor so that changed it for me. The lesson was also only half an hour-i really think any longer and mine would have been very cold.
In your situation I can see why you would want to delay.

pollylocketpickedapocket · 14/08/2021 08:29

@girlmom21

I think they need to stop using Covid as an excuse now...

We've been going to normal family swim sessions at our local pool and there have been spectators at the main pool.

These are swimming beginners with unqualified staff. I'd call and say you'll be attending and staying poolside as per their adverts to be honest. It's one of the few situations id insist of being 'that' parent.

Exactly all Covid restrictions are over now. My dd swimming instructor is in the pool with them now and we’ve been allowed poolside all the way through.

ToastieSnowy · 14/08/2021 08:29

At that age my DC went for half an hour lessons with parents sitting poolside. My eldest DS would sometimes refuse to get in until the final 5 mins, often one of the kids swimming would need the loo. They also needed help getting ready for swimming then dressed at the end.

No way would I have left them at that age.

Your DD sounds like she wouldn’t refuse to get in but in case anyone has one at that age, I preserved with DS1, it was really hard at the time, and he’s now a teenager who swims competitively. No way could that have happened had I not been able to stay with him at his lessons.

pollylocketpickedapocket · 14/08/2021 08:30

@RubertRoo

My 3 year old DDs lessons are like this and work really well. I drop her at the door and she goes in and I go back and sit in the car. If she needs rhe toilet they ring me and I go in to her to help her. Then 5 mins before the lesson ends I go in and wait in whichever changing room she'll end up in, then help her dry get changed and leave. I think it works really well!

3 years old?!? No way.

Itsanewdah · 14/08/2021 08:37

Same everywhere in the moment? We are not allowed in any lessons, including swimming (youngest is just 4)

TheWayTheLightFalls · 14/08/2021 08:42

Interesting. I have a nearly 4yo enrolled on an intensive (every day) swimming course next week at a private pool. Some swimming experience but not much really. Afaik I’ll be watching from the sidelines. I think I’d be fine just dropping her off Tues-Fri, but I’d want to see the pool, instructors, behaviour and ages of other kids etc.

CakeandGo · 14/08/2021 08:43

we’ve been allowed poolside all the way through
Thinking about it, we have too. They said no siblings watching and one parent only, distanced the chairs and wore masks etc but yes, we’ve been ‘allowed’ to be there watching the entire time for children under 8.

pollylocketpickedapocket · 14/08/2021 08:49

@Itsanewdah

Same everywhere in the moment? We are not allowed in any lessons, including swimming (youngest is just 4)

Nope, we’re allowed in swimming, always have been, and also back in the gymnastics class from last week.

diamondpony80 · 14/08/2021 08:52

I wouldn’t. DD has just finished a week of swim lessons and although she had to arrive “swim ready” as well, we were allowed stay in the viewing gallery and picked her up poolside when she was done. She was never out of our sight at any time. It’s a big leisure centre though so I guess they have the space and facilities to do that. DD is also a complete beginner, has ASD & used to be terrified of the water so I wouldn’t have left her off without being able to watch and make sure she was ok. Being able to watch also meant I learnt the skills to teach her when we go to our own swimming sessions. 4.5 is very young to be left on her own.

fhammock · 14/08/2021 08:55

I definitely couldn't have done that with either of mine. Might be different if they'd already been having lessons a while and then had to start taking themselves in etc because they'd know the teacher, where to go etc. Not if they've never done it before.

Bonmonkhouse · 14/08/2021 08:58

we take them to the change room swim ready, wait with then for instuctor and then have to go sit in the car. At the end we meet them in a different change room to get them dried

Same here, it's pretty standard ATM. At the end young kid parents go in in a mask to help. There's a lifeguard and instructors. Half the time I couldn't see my child during lessons anyway as we were in a viewing room.

I'd sign her up. Swimming is important, don't let covid set her back if she loves it.

Bunnycat101 · 14/08/2021 09:34

‘My 3 year old DDs lessons are like this and work really well. I drop her at the door and she goes in and I go back and sit in the car. If she needs rhe toilet they ring me and I go in to her to help her.’

I wouldn’t be happy with that set-up either. It seems too much of a faff for a teacher to have to get the mobile numbers, call a parent, faff with said 3 year old who needs a wee until the parent arrives from the car.

Fullofglee · 14/08/2021 09:51

I'm a swimming teacher and thats crazy! For a start what if they required first aid? At 4 if they never done swimming lessons they need that parent there who may reassure them or help with aids. They are putting themselves at risk by operating in that way. Have they got lifeguards aswell? My parents sit on pool side and observe the

Fullofglee · 14/08/2021 09:52

Lessons, I've had many who have had nose bloods etc where first aid is required.

MrsSkylerWhite · 14/08/2021 09:54

I would cancel.

Parents are allowed to spectate at our local pool now. There’s no reason not to (seats probably 100 and there are maybe 15 at each session).

Fullofglee · 14/08/2021 10:03

Also an hour is fair far too long. I know what sessions your talking about that are reduced price for level 1 and 2s to train they usually take place in leisure centres and sometimes large schools I know Newcastle and Sunderland used one and they hire a lifeguard, however there is a place for them to observe especially as some children can get quite unsettled and cry. I'd never drop my child off for an hour and leave the building.

Teeheehee1579 · 14/08/2021 10:05

We had this ridiculous faff at private lessons - lessons every other week so smaller groups, 10 mins shaved off the end ‘because of COVID’, no spectators blah. Not cheap either. We moved to local council pool lessons where there are no restrictions and everyone cracks on. Works really well. No one should be using COVID as a reason to have restrictions still in place, it certainly doesn’t benefit the children. I’d find somewhere else if I were you.

And the PP who gets phoned if her 3 year old needs a wee - how utterly ridiculous and what a waste of a lesson for everyone with the instructor faffing about phoning and waiting, that is actually one of the most ridiculous ‘because of COVID’ policies I have heard re swimming.

TheDistortion · 14/08/2021 10:10

I would cancel. We tried swimming lessons for DS when he was four at Butlins where you could accompany him to the poolside but then they took them off to the other side of the big, weird shaped pool so you couldn’t really see them. He hated it and made no progress whatsoever. Signed him up for summer holiday lessons at our local leisure pool, where you could sit by the pool, and he quickly progressed both in skill and in not actually needing us right there, so we could sit in the cafe area which had a window onto the pool.
In a longwinded way I think I am trying to say even if it is just at first I think it’s important for a young child starting a new and scary activity to have you close at least at first.

Original poster

HungryHippo11 · 14/08/2021 10:11

I'd sign her up. Swimming is important, don't let covid set her back if she loves it.

Absolutely agree that swimming is important. I'm concerned that if she has a bad experience here e.g. being scared because she is somewhere unfamiliar without me, being tired because its an hour session, being upset because she can't go to the toilet because she doesn't know who to ask... that could put her off swimming or lessons and actually be detrimental.

I'm going to the large pool near us today to enquire about lessons. It will be more expensive but I think safer.

OP posts:

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