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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Have grown to dislike the Lake District..

202 replies

ConfusedParticle · 14/08/2021 00:36

Lived there for 6 years, in Ambleside then close to Kirkby Lonsdale. Absolutely breathtaking scenery and perfect for a wilderness lover such as myself, but I have only just realised recently that I don't want to go back...

I left to tie up some family estate issues and planned to move back over after covid calmed down (ahem, will it ever!), and since I prefer to rent, this is easy enough to do. There are some exquisite properties and those that I lived in were gorgeous, so it made sense to plan going back.

I have located a new place in the South Lakes and have been offered a moving date for September but I am not so sure at all now and want to have a good long think.

However! Something has been niggling at me for the past year, for such a wild and lovely place, it feels so overly commercialised that I haven't missed the insanity one bit. At first I thought I needed to get my head checked, but recently whenever I consider going back I feel stressed and weary about it. It is very different to live there than to visit as a tourist. The roads, etc are fucking crazy!

But AIBU to not want to live there anymore? It seems so odd to have 'gone off' it like this, and I have really enjoyed the pace of life being less frantic and tourist thronged since ive been in another area, I have no idea how visitors can find it 'relaxing'.

Anyone else feel similarly? For all it's beauty, the hordes (which are increasing by a few million per year) and pollution are depressing. The central areas all contain the exact same shops and any authentic remnants have been gutted.

OP posts:
Original poster
ConfusedParticle · 14/08/2021 00:38

Just to add: I do not resent tourism or anyone who visits (who can blame them?), but living there permanently can be something else.

OP posts:
Igneo · 14/08/2021 00:39

YANBU.

uktrippin · 14/08/2021 00:41

This a thread designed to put the offcomers off? Wink

Yeah the roads get busy around Ambleside but YABU to describe the roads of Kirkby Lonsdale as "fucking crazy". Hardly

ACloseMatch · 14/08/2021 00:42

You are absolutely correct. We had similarities feelings towards coastal living (in our home town) and lasted 4 years before we realised that we loved it but didn't want to live there

Original poster
ConfusedParticle · 14/08/2021 00:44

@uktrippin

This a thread designed to put the offcomers off? Wink

Yeah the roads get busy around Ambleside but YABU to describe the roads of Kirkby Lonsdale as "fucking crazy". Hardly

haha, no! Im not back there yet! I love what the tourists bring though, we get some great supermarkets and lovely things going on, always something to do.

Roads near KB are fine, true, but I travelled into Kendal lot and had to work in Windermere quite a bit.

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Peakypolly · 14/08/2021 00:45

Ha- I feel just like this about my home city of Bath. When people rave about it, I just think how different it is now and how much less pleasant in every way. And guess where I'm pining for? The Lakes.
I love the great dining scene in Cumbria and can still seem to find peace although, in prime holiday season, that can be difficult.
I think maybe it is familiarity breeding contempt and also remembering past times with a rosy glow. Sounds like you don't have to be in The Lakes so choose somewhere quieter.

BitterTits · 14/08/2021 00:49

I visited the other day and found it hideously crowded, just awful. It was a shock to the system as I live in Wales where the coastline is rarely so busy.

WorraLiberty · 14/08/2021 00:49

How can you possibly be unreasonable to not want to live somewhere?

There are tonnes of places all of us wouldn't want to live, for loads of reasons.

If you don't own your home, there's nothing unreasonable about choosing to rent elsewhere.

Original poster
ConfusedParticle · 14/08/2021 00:49

I'd honestly love to live closer to the Peak District, although lettings are less abundantly available.

The area I am supposed to be moving back to is Milnthorpe, but am not so sure. It might be an idea to think it through a little before I commit. I know Milnthorpe isn't very busy, but it feels a touch cut off.

OP posts:
Original poster
ConfusedParticle · 14/08/2021 00:50

@WorraLiberty

How can you possibly be unreasonable to not want to live somewhere?

There are tonnes of places all of us wouldn't want to live, for loads of reasons.

If you don't own your home, there's nothing unreasonable about choosing to rent elsewhere.

I know, although it always puzzles people when I say ive gone off it! I wonder how other's feel.
OP posts:
JockTamsonsBairns · 14/08/2021 00:51

YANBU. My Aunt lived in Luss, near Loch Lomond for all of her 84 years of life, and she felt exactly the same as you for the final ten years.
Coach loads of tourists arriving day after day, hundreds of people walking up the main street in their droves, peering into the cottages. Her life was never her own in her later years, and it became the source of so much unhappiness for her.
I understand the commercial attraction of these places, but the residents pay a high price.

Original poster
ConfusedParticle · 14/08/2021 00:53

Ive lived in two cities and a few large towns in my lifetime, and Ambleside is, hands down, the most frantic place ive ever experienced Grin

OP posts:
Doublestar · 14/08/2021 00:54

I love visiting the lakes but I wouldn't want to live there.

Of course YANBU - people want to live in different places for different reasons. The thought of living in London for instance is my idea of hell but obviously a lot of people absolutely love it and wouldn't live anywhere else. There's no right and wrong.

Daft question IMO. Is this designed to be a Lakes-bashing thread?

LoLo2020 · 14/08/2021 01:01

I live not too far fr Kirkby Lonsdale and would not want to live within the park boundaries. I moved here from down south and find it, for the most part, very peaceful.

DramaAlpaca · 14/08/2021 01:28

I hear you. I grew up there, it's beautiful and I love it, it's in my blood and my bones for many generations, but I can't live there. I know tourism is the lifeblood of the region but the crowds are just too much.

MobyDicksTinyCanoe · 14/08/2021 01:36

Stop heading to the tacky, Blackpool with Greenery parts of the lakes.
I live locally too but wouldn't visit Ambleside if you paid me.. Cast your net a little further, what about Ulverston? (( outside the park but a fab little market town)) even Greenodd (( odd little place but there's nothing else like it)) or even head up the coast to st Bees or something. Ravenglass / Eskdale is stunning. You're really missing out

Go anywhere but bleddy Ambleside

Original poster
ConfusedParticle · 14/08/2021 01:37

@Doublestar

I love visiting the lakes but I wouldn't want to live there.

Of course YANBU - people want to live in different places for different reasons. The thought of living in London for instance is my idea of hell but obviously a lot of people absolutely love it and wouldn't live anywhere else. There's no right and wrong.

Daft question IMO. Is this designed to be a Lakes-bashing thread?

seriously, just chill.
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Asherline · 14/08/2021 01:44

I love the Lake District but definitely wouldn't love there. Went to bowness last week and it was suffocating with people it must be horrendous to live there. The quiet areas are an escape but the novelty would wear off. But the lakes are the best place on earth I will never tire of visiting and walking up a hill and looking at the views

QuidcoQueen · 14/08/2021 01:47

I'm in the Peak District.
My mental commentary has been "fucking tourists" quite a bit since the schools broke up.

I feel your pain!

I have stayed in Ambleside though. Absolutely lovely round there but I don't blame you for wanting to be away from it all.

Lindy2 · 14/08/2021 01:47

I absolutely love the Lakes but I wouldn't want to actually live there. I don't think I'd actually like to live in any very touristy destination.

Original poster
ConfusedParticle · 14/08/2021 02:32

Ive been ruminating over this for a while, and felt quite silly trying to convince myself I don't wish to go back.
but it's true.
This thread has helped to solidify that feeling, oddly enough.

Im free as a bird at present, so can move anywhere, so long as the price is within my budget, so London is out!
I may just try something new.

OP posts:
Asherline · 14/08/2021 02:44

You have to be somewhere that's you. To me London would be intolerable it's just not in me, but for certain people London is the aim, anyone in politics, fashion, fast paced life career/international people London is essential, no one living in a village in the lakes will become the prime minister. But to me the lakes and tiny villages are too small. I live in a small town on the coast, near the river 1 hour from the lakes, an hour from nearest cities, Less than 2 hours from Wales, so to me is perfect location. Not everyone would agree but depends what you want to be happy

SHKMama123 · 14/08/2021 02:46

I live in Holme village, about 5 miles from Milnthorpe and its lovely. I wouldn't describe Milnthorpe as cut off by any means, it's close to some really nice places - Arnside, Silverdale, Beetham, and Lancaster is easily accessed along the A6. I grew up in Staveley and went to school in Windermere so Ive spent a lot of time in the Lakes. As an adult with two kids, I avoid the Lakes as much as possible, especially during the summer and on dreaded Bank Holidays!!

Tealightsandd · 14/08/2021 02:49

Can't advise where you should go - but if you don't want hordes, franticness, year round tourists, authenticity as a living city for locals long gone, plus hellish traffic, definitely avoid London.

Tealightsandd · 14/08/2021 03:02

You'll notice that all the people for whom London is apparently essential, don't live there full-time or permanently. For them it's a workplace - somewhere to be used (at the expense of locals). Look at where those people in politics, fashion, fast paced life career/international people - and the prime minister (plus ex PMs) choose to make their main/permanent home. It's not London.