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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Please help me (not with money... your good)

2 replies

idontknowwhyibother · 12/08/2021 17:39

Please help me here. I'm at the point of desperation.
We moved four years ago to be close to my in laws. My DH wasn't doing well mentally where we lived either so it was more for his benefit than anything else - if there wasn't the issue of DHs MH I wouldn't of moved here.
There has been a lot of arguments in the in laws over the years and it's been a horrible stressful experience. The BIL and his wife (who caused 99% of the problems) moved away yet his oldest son moved in with my MIL.
The stress went away for a year, just us and MIL + DN.
Then DN went off the rails due to his mum (not outing myself) and caused MIL a lot of problems.
MIL has had enough and called DNs bluff and told him to move back to his parents.

Now this means it'll only be us and MIL living here alone... my kids have no family to play with, I miss the family dimantics and I really don't want to be left here with MIL alone as it means we'll have to live here until we'll yknow,,,

I really want to move to where my family live, they have moved out of the area causing DH issues with his MH. All my family would live locally and it's a massive family who would involve our kids etc.
My DH now is refusing to even think of the idea of moving as it means his mum will be alone. :(

What do I do? My eldest daughter has special needs and it makes me sad seeing her grow up without family near by! I feel like my kids are missing out on a lot and I feel tricked moving here really... I hope I don't sound like a selfish cow.

OP posts:
StepGarlic · 12/08/2021 19:41

Would living in between the two work?
Would his mum like to live alone?
I think you need to have your fair share of living near your parents.

Babdoc · 13/08/2021 08:44

If his mum is currently living alone, could she move to your home area as well? Either in a granny annexe to your house, or in a nearby home of her own. That way you and DH can both have family at hand, and MIL will have help available as she gets frailer.

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