To ask how affection are you in your marriage

[Lockeddownagain]

Do you hold hands, cuddle on the sofa, kiss in the day. Not sex but affection.

Yes, all of the above. We're 23 years in and have a 10yo, I think it's important he sees handholding and sharing a sofa blanket (for example) as normal in a relationship.

Very in Private, not as much in public.

All of those things.

Yes. Would say fairly affectionate. Hold hands, hug a lot. Like to sit on the sofa and cuddle up.

Were not noticeably affectionate (don't sit together of an evening, don't kiss much, don't hold hands) but there's very subtle affection going on... We touch each other a lot, a shoulder squeeze, an arm stroke, a little butt pat. Things you wouldn't notice in a fleeting moment but they add up.

Not exceptionally affectionate but that’s partly because I get very touched out very quickly. We also have two young children (7 and 10m) so usually tending to them. We hold hands if we’re out and not pushing a buggy or keeping control of a child. We hug and kiss at home during the day sometimes.

a little butt pat

We do this a lot.

Nothing at all because dh just views routine affection as a come on and if I don't feel like it, it's a problem for me to have to deal with.

Thirty years in and the children cringe at hand holding in public. Not on sofa usually as we sit on different ones. Would never arrive home or go out without kissing hello and goodbye. Good luck or bad luck longer hugs. Waist hug squeeze past.
Hugs from behind if he’s about to pick at whatever I’m cooking. A bit of mutual grooming - straightening tie, plucking Dennis Healey eyebrow hair, tucking in labels, brushing off hair or doing up necklaces.
Applying creams and massaging stiff muscles. Steadying hands on rickety stairs, coming out with umbrella to car if it’s raining, warming car up in cold weather, practical affectionate behaviours.

We love each other a lot, but we’re not especially affectionate. We’ll have a hug at the end of a long day, and we sometimes hold hands when we’re out and about, but I’m not tactile generally.

Very affectionate in the home much to the delight of our kids. Never any public displays of affection.

We have been together for 20 years. We have had children for 10 years. Since the kids came along we just lost each other and for the past 5 years we have both been unhappy in our relationship. We nearly seperated but decided to try again because we still love each other. The affection is back now just like it was at the beginning of the relationships and it feels wonderful I have to say. I didn't realise the effect if was having on me not recieving any affection.

We're less affectionate in public but very behind closed doors.

Together 4 years, married 2. hold hands sometimes in public but hate kissing etc in public. at home lots of hugs and kisses. currently just us at home but baby on the way PG. I dread us both going back to the office as won't be able to have random hugs in the middle of the day!

Cuddle on the sofa - no, there's usually at least one cat between us.

Hold hands - not really, haven't been out anywhere that provides the opportunity for 18 months and it interferes with the Fitbits' tracking

Snuggle up together in bed - rarely. There's usually one cat between us and another hogging the gap between the pillows, smirking because he's been so clever in identifying the opportunity and getting away with it. It would have to be about 3C before we even consider getting close at night outside anything sexual.

But, on the other hand, I had to wake him up this morning because I had an early morning blood test and managed to forget my door key, he came down to let me in, put the kettle on for coffee damn these fasted tests and gave me a hug and a kiss before plodding back upstairs to go back to sleep.

He also fake tanned my legs last night, regularly does sports type massages after the gym, will bearhug me at least 3 times a day to crack my ribs back into position (I have hypermobility and the facet joints hurt when they shift) and will help me with putting on emollient/steroid creams for Psoriasis and taking off my gym compression tops and socks when I'm too knackered afterwards to move. I will usually touch him when walking through the kitchen and only have to sit down on the rug in front of him when he's watching TV to get an automatic neck and shoulder massage.

We spend a lot of time doing our own thing even when in the house together, so it could be 6 hours in different rooms of the house before we even speak.

It's a different type of intimacy, rather than just 'affection'. It's easy, it's comfortable and frankly, more rewarding and useful than squishing up together on a too-small sofa.

Yes we’re really affectionate all day

No, but we’re not in love.

None of it in private or public. He doesn't even kiss me ever.

Good sex life but it is affection I crave.

Yes. Hand holding, cuddles. I love to squeeze his bum and put my arms around him from behind when he is cooking. Married 31 years.

Yes loads! I can’t physically walk past with him without touching him

He’s very much the same. It’s so inportnsnt to us as our sex life has dwindled a little due to long hours at work and pregnancy.

We spoon in bed when it's not absolutely boiling, we're not hugely affectionate to be honest but we never go anywhere without a kiss goodbye, he will give me a kiss if he's going upstairs to do some work haha. We will sometimes hold hands and cuddle on the sofa, and also hold hands when we're out and about. The main issue is we're both very warm people who don't like being very warm..

Very, but not necessarily in the obvious ways as NeverDropYourMooncup says.

We have separate sofas and we like our own space in bed generally, and we have our own office spaces in the house and hobbies that we do alone in the evenings, so we can spend hours in separate rooms. If we're out in public we don't tend to hold hands because I'm uncoordinated and annoyed to walk next to and there's a decent height difference haha.

But if he comes down for a drink, I get a kiss or a squeeze on the way past. If I go upstairs, I'll go and sit on his knee for a minute and say hi while he tries to play his game (hahaha).

We each take a brew to the bathroom when the other is in the bath and will wash each other's hair (the nicest, most intimate feeling - 10/10 would recommend!).

No passing bum goes ungrabbed (consensually and affectionately).

We're both awful sleepers and probably only share our bed 2-3 nights a week the whole night through, but once a week or so, whoever's not in our bed will scurry back in in the morning for a spoon and a chat before the day starts.

Married 14 years - yes, we do hold hands, kiss, cuddle etc. When on sofa or going to bed/waking up. I read something a few years ago that a really large % of people in relationships pick up their phone before they touch their parter in the morning and although I didn't generally do that beforehand anyway, I try to make sure that we do have a cuddle before I pick up my phone for the first time, unless he's got up before me!

We're very affectionate, when we're together we're always touching in some way. We kiss a lot, the husband is still WFH and I'll go up to his office for a hug and kiss or he'll come down to get a drink etc and we'll have a hug and a kiss then.