To think this is selfish ?

[LemonSherbetFancies]

Kids emigrated from Australia to live here. Moved to an area and put both kids into the local school. Moved the eldest one to a better school in the same area after 3 months. Both kids happy at their schools but now the parents want to move again to another nicer area in the same country meaning the kids will yet again have to change schools and lose their childminder who they really like.

@Touloser

8 year old twins, but they moved the eldest one

🤣🤣🤣 oh dear.

Gives a load of info that is probably outing but fucks up the ages so as not to be outing 🤣🤣

My 9 year old has lived in three different countries. As a pp said, it’s not wildly unusual to move to a country, settle somewhere temporarily to look around you and then move again to somewhere that suits you.

Far odder to start a thread about the possible psychological effects on possible twins who are nothing to do with you at all…?

@Touloser

8 year old twins, but they moved the eldest one

🤣🤣

I wouldn't be crazy about the idea

There are far too many variables for anyone to definitively make a judgement.

They moved Dec 2020 so during pandemic and perhaps made certain choices with limited information - hence change of school for example

You write that they’re moving to a nicer place which leads one to interpret where they live is not so nice. Again, if they chose where they live now based only on what was available December 2020, realise it is not the best fit, why would it be selfish to move to better, or nicer, or more suitable location?

As they are friends of your grandkids I doubt you know the full story
Perhaps trust the parents judgement on what is best for their family and their children?

Depends on way they are moving.

I agree it’s unfair. It’s been proved even taking into account all other factors that moving 3 plus times in childhood is detrimental to a child’s development. Why do you think the army funds boarding schools?

Sounds very much like it's none of your damn business quite honestly. Stop judging others and do something useful.

Gosh, cmon op, surely you’re old enough to know that you don’t have the full story so shouldn’t be judging?

Seems like a very specious connection (grandkids friends). Why do you care?

@MsTSwift

I agree it’s unfair. It’s been proved even taking into account all other factors that moving 3 plus times in childhood is detrimental to a child’s development. Why do you think the army funds boarding schools?

Other things are detrimental to a child too though, like having miserable parents stuck living in a place they hate.

I don’t know why people in the UK get so worked up about kids not ever being able to move school, it’s just mad. Kids have to learn to cope with change. Kids move school all the time for all sorts of reasons. Of course 8 year olds are anxious about change but properly managed with parental help they get through it just fine. They have to learn to cope with change when young otherwise you end up with anxious adults, not able to not have sausages for dinner on a Monday’s, stuck in the same shit job and same shit relationship because they have no resilience and can’t cope with anything new in their lives ever, never open to new ideas or learning from mistakes because change is bad and terrifying and they should avoid it. It’s just ridiculous to think an 8 year old needs to stay put in the same location for the entirety of their school life, their lives need to be dictated by parental jobs and financial circumstances, not that their best friend for the past two months is Mary and they won’t cope if they have to move to a new school and be best friends with someone else. Just so silly, plus you don’t even know them, they are just kids who are friends with your grandchildren, not kids you tuck in bed at night and know well.

And the problem is?

Where on earth did you get that assumption from @TheFrogsAreDying? 😂 That's just bizarre

@TheFrogsAreDying

I don’t know why people in the UK get so worked up about kids not ever being able to move school, it’s just mad. Kids have to learn to cope with change. Kids move school all the time for all sorts of reasons. Of course 8 year olds are anxious about change but properly managed with parental help they get through it just fine. They have to learn to cope with change when young otherwise you end up with anxious adults, not able to not have sausages for dinner on a Monday’s, stuck in the same shit job and same shit relationship because they have no resilience and can’t cope with anything new in their lives ever, never open to new ideas or learning from mistakes because change is bad and terrifying and they should avoid it. It’s just ridiculous to think an 8 year old needs to stay put in the same location for the entirety of their school life, their lives need to be dictated by parental jobs and financial circumstances, not that their best friend for the past two months is Mary and they won’t cope if they have to move to a new school and be best friends with someone else. Just so silly, plus you don’t even know them, they are just kids who are friends with your grandchildren, not kids you tuck in bed at night and know well.

Good post, @TheFrogsAreDying. My DS who is nine has had a lot of change over the last couple of years —country, and several unavoidable rented house moves in new country, school, friends — but we’re making sure he’s supported snd that he sees us all negotiating change together.

@MuddyStiletto, what assumption do you mean?

People in the UK @NotableTree

@MuddyStiletto

People in the UK *@NotableTree*

I’m inclined to agree with @TheFrogsAreDying on that, @MuddyStiletto — I’m not from the UK, though I lived there for 25 years, and I certainly find the attitudes to emigration and to moving around in general very unlike anywhere else I’ve ever lived.