My weight is out of control - help please

[Lemonandgingers]

posting as a last ditch attempt to get my weight under control.

I ballooned during lockdown, I gained around 45-50lbs, which I desperately need to lose.

Health wise I feel horrendous. My mental health has declined, I keep getting depressive episodes directly linked to my size, but they zap my motivation.

I feel so stuck. It’s such a lot to lose, I feel out of my depth, I weigh more now than I did when heavily pregnant

If anyone can offer any words of advice I would really appreciate it. I feel overwhelmed, ashamed, and really sad. I know I have to do something - I’ve considered meal replacements, but I don’t want to pile the weight back on again if I ever lose it!

I am so desperate to change. Tia

Don't do anything like a drastic change. Here is one approach that's effective:

You need to work out how many calories you're eating per day, on average. Work that out over the course of a week. You have to be brutally honest and count everything, everything you drink, don't miss anything out, etc.

Say this amount is 3000 per day. You now need to reduce it gradually. This is where people usually go wrong - they slash it down and then cannot stick to it as it's such a massive change and their body cries out for food. You need to sacrifice the fact you may gain 1-2 lbs by this slight delay but long term the approach will work.

Cut down by 200 cals every few days, 2800, 2600, 2400, 2200 til you're at 2000. This should be a maintenance amount (or a figure near there).

From there you cut down by 200 every few days, then wait on the new amount. I'd go down to 1500. You need to make sure everything you eat is nutritious and don't waste calories - you want good quality food. Make sure you have something before bed like a small can of beans with a little bit of cheese or something similar or it may be hard to sleep.

Calorie counting does work long term. If you weigh yourself one week and then the next of course the number might not be accurate but over the course of a month, two months, it will be.

This method never failed for me but I was maybe a bit too 'successful' at it as I went from 10 stone (I'm pretty tall) to 5 stone and ended up in hospital for seven months. However, it does work to lose weight and calorie counting is more effective than any other method IMO.

I was always thin then when I turned 50 I started to gain weight not helped by a job that I was bored stiff in and had lots of snack type fppd lying around. When I stated to get short of breath on the flat I knew I had to do something so I lost 6 1/2 stone that was 5 years ago. What worked for me was following a very prescribed diet and seeing someone on a 1-1 once a week at a time that's convenient for me this is. very important as I work erratic hours and Im just not group person. I did no extra exercise at all.
I learnt three things 1. you have to do the diet that works for you everyone will recommend X and Y but it has to work I don't want to count calories or attend groups. 2 whilst dieting I watched friends who are perenially thin and asked them about their eating habits. Prior to loosing the weight if I was out say shopping with them I would eat crap: cakes sweets processed sandwiches coffee with added flavours etc they would drink black coffee or water no cakes biscuits etc. Secondly a couple told they were always calorie counting in their heads most said they aimed to eat about 1500 Kcals a day if one day they went over the next day they ate less. Some exercise some dont. I have kept the weight off I like my friends cut out the crap and if I over eat one day I eat less the next, occassionllu I fall off the wagon so I monitor it all the time as soon as I put any significant weight on more than 1/2 a stone I go back to the diet consultant and diet for a few weeks to get it off. 3. You have to use the time you are dieting to seriously change your eating habits you can't diet loose weight and go straight back to your old ways.
A wise friend once said "I couldn't live like that, being thin and staying thin is obviously very important to you for you and and you're prepared to hard work to keep that up, it really isn't that important to me." This is the nub of it in my view how important is being and staying an acceptable weight this is why most people diet and then put the weight back on.

I haven’t met anyone who maintained on SW. As soon as they stopped, they piled the weight back on.

I also found the book ‘Why We Eat (too much)’ helpful.

OP, I found myself in a similar position to you last year. It doesn’t help that I have a couple of conditions which make putting on weight much easier and losing it much harder. I am also post menopausal. However, I realised I had to do something, especially as COVID is known to be more of a problem for obese people, even more so in the over fifties, so, at the beginning of the second lockdown in November, l started intermittent fasting 16/8. I don’t have a set of scales but going by my clothes and photos, I have lost around three stones. I am now in size 12 on my top half. It can be done - if I can do it, absolutely anyone can

@FrownedUpon

I haven’t met anyone who maintained on SW. As soon as they stopped, they piled the weight back on.

I also found the book ‘Why We Eat (too much)’ helpful.

To be fair I have a friend who has, together, one has, one hasn’t, the one who has just goes back when he gains a few.

@FrownedUpon

I haven’t met anyone who maintained on SW. As soon as they stopped, they piled the weight back on.

I also found the book ‘Why We Eat (too much)’ helpful.

Andrew Jenkinson explains this phenomenon in his book. Slimming clubs are basically businesses and they want your money so you are successful while sticking to their plan but once you have reached either your target weight or you are bored with the plan you generally gradually put the weight you have lost back on and more so you go back to the slimming club because you lost the weight on their plan before. The only person l know who has maintained her target weight after following the SW plan has Asperger’s Syndrome.

OP, l strongly recommend Dr. Andrew Jenkinson’s book - it is very enlightening. I would also suggest having some really nice clothes in the size you are now as this will really help your self esteem.

I would highly recommend either:
Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred workout (it is amazing and not even that difficult).

My Fitness Pal website: you can track your calories by keeping an online food diary and there are online support forums and a social media type page.

A slimming group: lots of group.support and a plan to follow.

Walk as much as you can. DH lost 3 stone in past 8 months by walking lots. He got a step counter app on his phone and aims for a set amount of steps a day.

For motivation:
Print a current photo of yourself you don't like, and carry it around with you or put on fridge door to motivate you.

Buy a dress or item of clothing in a smaller size, one or two sizes down and aim to fit in it.

Good luck

It isn't easy and takes time but once you start seeing a difference that will be all the motivation you need to keep going.

Good luck

I have no idea why Good luck is there twice lol

Buy a dress or item of clothing in a smaller size, one or two sizes down and aim to fit in it.

To do this you need to be better motivated than me. Charity shops have benefitted from several size 12s I bought when I was a size 16 now a size 20

I found just reducing what I ate at night very helpful.

Found intermittent fasting and daily cardio worked for me. Lost 2 stone in 4 months and kept it off. Went from size 14 to size 10

@PopcornMuncher

Buy a dress or item of clothing in a smaller size, one or two sizes down and aim to fit in it.

To do this you need to be better motivated than me. Charity shops have benefitted from several size 12s I bought when I was a size 16 now a size 20

I actually find it demotivating. Most people i know do

Hello OP just wondered how you're getting on? What helped me was getting a Fitbit because it tracks all your activity and you can log your food. I find as soon as I start doing this, I eat a bit better, move more and weight starts dropping.

I've lost about 4 stone since this time last year, mainly by preparing home made lunches (no more Tesco meal deal), including as much veg as possible in every meal and doing couch to 5k. This helped me enjoy running outside. I've recently hit a bit of a plateau so I'm using the Courtney Black app for workouts, they are quite hard but I can see a difference in my shape.

I was a size 20-22, now a size 16 in most places which makes shopping a lot easier. It's been slow and steady for me, I'd like to lose about another stone and a half but I'm going to take that slowly too.

Good luck and keep us posted!

@PopcornMuncher

Buy a dress or item of clothing in a smaller size, one or two sizes down and aim to fit in it.

To do this you need to be better motivated than me. Charity shops have benefitted from several size 12s I bought when I was a size 16 now a size 20

This is why I suggested buying some really nice clothes in the size you are now. People compliment a nice item of clothing in, say, size 20 as much as they do size 10, particularly if the wearer appears confident and has a lovely smile. I have clothes from the 1980s that I —know— dream will fit me again but never will.

@LBirch02 how long did you do fast 800? I want to lose my last hand stone but
Plateaued on 16:8 so need a massive kick to restart the last leg

Half stone haha

I have also dropped 40lb, gone from 20/22 to a 16. Have kept it off for 2 years. I might up things a bit to lose some more, I might not...

What worked for me was the "why the fuck am I eating now?" plan, to begin things... beginning things is the hardest bit.

We know that we eat breakfast/lunch/dinner to get nutrients, keep up energy levels etc...

Get up, have breakfast... any breakfast... cereal, toast, eggs, yoghurt with fruit, whatever. Then don't eat til lunchtime.

If you reach for food before then, ask Why? Hungry? Thirsty? Bored?... do something mind consuming... and have a better breakfast tomorrow.

Then for lunch have a sandwich and a bit of fruit. Something "everyday" and boring. Familiarity stops craving, my big problem was not having the sandwich and fruit, it was the HABIT of having them AND the grab bag of crisps, and the chocolate bar, and the biscuits mid afternoon...

Again in the afternoon ask why if you need something else. Add more stuff that is good for you in lunch if actually hungry.

Then have a standard tea , something you usually eat but less of it, not a lot less, you want to lose weight slowly but surely and not be hungry... as you lower carbs/meat increase veg and you soon feel the benefit.

In the evening I don't eat after 7... acid reflux gone. No longer need an acid suppressant, I digest what food I do eat better, my gut is healthier, many benefits.

I am not a qualified nutritionist. I cannot abide counting or replacement foodstuffs, but have found what works for me.