AIBU to ask for the day off work?

[user8740911]

I have a hospital appointment in two weeks, my first check up appointment since been diagnosed with cancer. I booked the day off work (Thursday) as holiday due to the distance of the hospital.
I was chatting with OH today and said I might ask my manager if I can book Friday off too or ask if I can leave it as a I might/might not be in depending on my results.
OH said I was been unreasonable and should go back to work on Friday. AIBU?

No you aren't! Book it off!

OH is closing his mind to the possibility of less-than-perfect news

Definitely book it off. Hopefully you can enjoy a nice long weekend.

Good luck at your appointment.

Book it off. Friday morning you will thank you.

Good luck with your appointment.

You shouldn't have to use leave for your hospital appointment tomorrow

@dancemom

You shouldn't have to use leave for your hospital appointment tomorrow

I need a whole day off for it due to the distance.

If you have the option of flexibility why would you decide so far in advance and why does your DH get to when you book holiday?

Why does he get to tell you when to book leave? I definitely would.

If the news isn't quite what you are hoping for, you have space to process. And if it's good news, you can celebrate by lying on the sofa eating cheese and drinking wine which is deffo what I would do

@dancemom

You shouldn't have to use leave for your hospital appointment tomorrow

There's no entitlement to paid leave for medical appointments unless an employer chooses to offer that.

@user8740911 you still shouldnt need to use leave, you're entitled to adequate travelling time in addition to your appointment

Apologies I thought it was a requirement for employers

You shouldn’t have to use A/L for a hospital appointment - the distance is irrelevant really. Definitely take it off - hopefully it’ll be good news and you can enjoy a nice lunch or whatever to celebrate If the worst happens then you’re not having to face work the next day. Hope everything goes well for you - fingers, toes and eyes crossed

Although I know the A/L depends on the employer

Having been in the position of receiving distressing news in medical appointments, I would absolutely book the Friday off. It might also make the anxiety as you approach the appointment more manageable to know you have some guaranteed breathing space afterwards.

Even when you get good or neutral news, the whole process can still take a lot out of you. Forcing yourself into work afterwards can make that harder.

Is your OH normally so lacking in empathy?

Is he usually this supportive 🙄

I would suggest speaking to work though and see what they're prepared to do for you as using up all your AL on hospital appointments isn't going to be great

I hope it goes well tomorrow x

@dancemom

Apologies I thought it was a requirement for employers

Sadly not.

I'd speak to your manager and book the Friday off, on the proviso that if you do somehow want to work you will cancel the leave.
Through a worrying time I threw myself into work too much and it all got on top of me eventually.
Sometimes you just need a day to chill and process good or bad news. Very much hoping you get good news. 💐

The minute you are diagnosed with cancer, you are classed as disabled in terms of employment rights, so they are legally bound to allow you time off for appointments. As others have said, this may or may not be paid, depending on your contract.
If you are able to leave things flexible, that sounds like the best option. Best of luck x

Book the day off, if that's what's needed, by you.

I was diagnosed with lung cancer on Friday 13/10/2009. I had a weekend to come to.terms with this, after telling my family, friends, boss, colleagues, team members.

Over the weekend I realised I was in no fit state, mentally, to go back to work. Physically I was ok, a bit uncomfortable, but that was it. But mentally? I was a basket case. !luckily for me, my gp completely understood and happily offered me a sick note until december, by which time all other tests to determine next steps would be done.

Neither you, nor your husband, can tell what your mental state might be. If it's good news (I do hope it is) or bad, your mental state is unlikely to be unaffected. For the sake of one days leave? Why not?

@Bsmirched

The minute you are diagnosed with cancer, you are classed as disabled in terms of employment rights, so they are legally bound to allow you time off for appointments. As others have said, this may or may not be paid, depending on your contract. If you are able to leave things flexible, that sounds like the best option. Best of luck x

Yes, but as you acknowledge there's no entitlement to paid leave and that's what people often don't appreciate.

And disability employment rights still don't protect from dismissal, so you do need to be mindful of their limitations. It's not like in the US where you'd be entitled to 12 weeks(?) of disability leave each year.

@Bsmirched it's really not as simple as have a disability be entitled to as much time off for appointments as you want.

[quote user1471457751]@Bsmirched it's really not as simple as have a disability be entitled to as much time off for appointments as you want.[/quote]
Yes yes. You can still be dismissed for being disabled - entirely lawfully.

I don't want to derail, just think misinformation about the scope of UK employment protections for disabled people is really unhelpful and potentially risks people getting into bother with their jobs at a time when they can least afford it or manage the stress.

Your appointment, your health, your job, your annual leave… your decision.

@54321nought

OH is closing his mind to the possibility of less-than-perfect news

this :(