To ask how to change from a massive procrastinator to a "doer"!

[ChungPo]

I've been off for a couple of months (between jobs) and I had planned to do a million things around the house, get myself organised and into some routine which I've never had. I started off ok for a couple of weeks and now I haven't done anything really productive 😃. I'm not sure how I'm spending my time as before I know it the day is over!
I have a vague list of stuff that needs doing but keep telling myself I'll start tomorrow and then tomorrow comes and I say the same thing again!

Can you please give me your best tips on how to not be so damn lazy!

Make your vague list an actual list. I have a chalkboard. When I have a chunk of time I write all the jobs down, from minor things like ring dentist to big things like paint bedroom. Over the day / weekend / week whatever, stuff gets crossed off. It's quite satisfying.

The ADDitude Podcast has some really good podcasts on Procastination and time management, aimed at people with ADHD but relevant to lots more.

ALARMY app in good if you are losing time staying in bed in the morning.

The organised mum method gives structure to your house work.

If you have Alexa, set reminders through the day to give you prompts to stop procrastinating and start cleaning, projects, excercise, go to bed at a sensible time etc.

Break your vague list down into smaller action points.
If your list consists of things you need to do then everyday write out the the ones you absolutely must do today - a must do list.
If your list consists of things you want to do then just try to do three small tasks each day. You will slowly make progress and you might find you do more than three things once you get going.
Play some music or a podcast and you will quite enjoy it.

I have a list, make a plan and stick to it. But if you have a few weeks off then there's no need for you to be in a massive hurry

Also try to group like items. So if you have some admin tasks, group them all together if you can.
Or if you need to leave the house to buy something, then combine a few trips while you are out.

Making a massive list is overwhelming you.
Decide to do one thing, then do it.

I agree with the list 100%! What works for me is after you've got your 'master list' writing the days jobs on the chalkboard and giving seeing yourself a schedule/reward after each one, ie I'll have a coffee and read for 20 mins after that one, nice lunch after that one, etc. If they're big tasks schedule yourself breaks - even set alarms - to break them up with your rewards. This really works for me!
You can do it

You could always just accept yourself as you are. It's not laziness, it's enjoying a period of ease.

Switch all your notifications off on your phone except calls. If it’s urgent, you’ll most likely get a call.
Don’t look at your phone til you get everything done.

I second the organised mum method for cleaning.

Also try to work out when you are at your most productive. For years I would get frustrated with myself that I wasn’t productive in the mornings but it turns out I’m a night owl.

What are you doing? What are you distracted by? Be strict and only let yourself do things until you’ve done certain things first

What kind of jobs are you hoping to get done? And what are you doing when you are procrastinating?

Maybe we could give you more specific help.

Do. Not. Sit. Down.

I'm the same OP. I actually do have ADHD though which a pp has mentioned. I have medication to help but it's very difficult without so I sympathise! My main distraction is my phone so I switch it off and make myself not touch it for X time while I get stuff done. Putting an audiobook on to listen to helps.

@LysistrataVickers

I'm the same OP. I actually do have ADHD though which a pp has mentioned. I have medication to help but it's very difficult without so I sympathise! My main distraction is my phone so I switch it off and make myself not touch it for X time while I get stuff done. Putting an audiobook on to listen to helps.

I stick a audiobook or podcast on in the background whilst cleaning, cooking, gardening. Sometimes it's professional podcasts for my job (makes my time doubly productive), or gardening podcasts, but other times I put "my dad wrote a porno" on and laugh hysterically whilst doing my chores/projects. It works really well at stopping me getting distracted by my phone as it keeps my brain engaged.

Put your phone down. Wifi off.

And you aren't allowed to pick it up unless someone rings you until 8pm tonight.

I think you'll get loads done

Ok so the jobs I need doing really vary from little things to massive stuff. On my list ( in my head!) I have...

• making a phone call to HMRC
• print, fill in and post a form
• go to bank to set up Ds bank account. He's 9 now and have been wanting to do this for years!
• call round workmen for quotes for refurb of living room ( need plasterer, joiner, gas person, electrician, need a wall knocking and making a new one). I absolutely hate organising stuff like this!
• want to get into a cleaning / cooking routine ( I have tried a million times but never stick to anything more than a couple of days).
• buy school uniform bits, school bags etc ready for sept
• I have a pile of stuff which needs selling on eBay - another job I don't enjoy.
• deep clean whole house, reorganise etc

There's other stuff but I find it all overwhelming. I want to have a clean, tidy and organised house and wake up knowing exactly what I'll be cooking today and what I'll be doing today. I want order in my life!

Oh and yes my biggest distraction is my phone!

Make a new list with only 3 items on.

Think about the best order to do things in.

So if you have a clothes wash to do any you know it takes an hour prioritise getting that on, have it ready the night before, put it on before a meal. Don't leave it to be the last job.

Pick an easy job first to get you started too, it's easier to continue after you've started.

there's no need for you to be in a massive hurry

Ah yes, the procrastinator’s charter.

Is this a life long problem op or a recent thing? If it’s recent then you may be reacting to your current circumstances or be a bit depressed? If it’s lifelong then that’s a different issue. I’ve recently been referred by my GP for an ADHD assessment because I’ve had a lifelong procrastination problem as well as an attention span problem.

So depending on how bad it is and the pattern you may need professional help.

print, fill in and post a form

List that as three separate things to do. Clean house isn’t a helpful list item as it’s too vague. Sort out top kitchen drawer is much more useful as it is specific.

Divide things up- so list five items on eBay. Or be very honest about if it’s worth doing. I sold DS’ old bike and some toys for £200 so absolutely worth it. Secondhand new look clothes aren’t worth the time so straight to the charity shop.

Choose two things to do before lunch. Get on the phone to Hmrc and photograph the eBay stuff whilst you are on hold.

Today, choose two and

I was the mainstay of the public library until I discovered mumsnet..........

Blame yourself.
It is your choice to put it off for another day, the guilt head space and negative thinking isn't worth it.
Push yourself to do 5 things, then another 5. You'll get there.

Agree with the "choose just a few things" approach, be realistic and take 10 minutes to look at the list and prioritise.

Ask a friend to help you be accountable?

If something fills you with dread, get someone else to do it?

Sometimes there is an underlying thing. So sitting quietly, not trying to distract yourself with phone etc,might help. Ask yourself kindly how you actually feel. The response might come back "bone weary" or "a bit unwell, that niggling knee thing/sinus trouble/period pain I've been blocking out is quite debilitating" or "I'm quite scared of starting my new job even though I wanted it" or "I'm worried about DD and her exam results".... or it might be "Full of joy, I want to lie in a lovely garden/go to a bar/visit an art gallery!"

I find when i stop blocking and forcing myself and telling myself off, the real situation emerges more gently. Then you can try and do what your body needs, leaving you feeling lighter and freer when the time comes for chores.

The other question is "why do I want to do this chore?" Reframing it positively like "I want to get my tax situation sorted now, so I know I'll get the right money in my new job" feels more positive than "Oh crap I have to call HMRC because I don't know what's going on with my P45" or whatever.