Feeling lost about non verbal 2 year old

[QuietBatperson15]

My son is 27 months now and doesn’t say any words. He has been referred for audiology to check his hearing (referred in April and still no appointment). His hearing seems absolutely fine to me but I know it’s not as simple as that. We are waiting for his SLT to start.

His understanding is great and he’s very interactive in other ways, but I watched a video of my older child around the same age and the difference is huge (talking away, naming colours).

Has anyone else had a child who seems fine in every other way but no speech whatsoever at this age? I can’t imagine him ever talking 😞

I wrote a very similar post to this when my DS was around the same age. Very bright, happy kid, almost no words at 2 years and then almost no progression for what felt like ages. I always knew he had great comprehension and babbled constantly.

I did take him to a speech therapist who agreed that while his speech would likely come in it’s own time (it has!), one of the strategies we tried was slowing our speech patterns right down when talking to him - because we knew he understood us perfectly, we kind of just would chat away a mile a minute in long complex adult sentences sometimes.

She advised that we should try sometimes (not all the time, just when you remember) to bring sentences down to just a few words. Like instead of saying ‘oh Tom can you just run over there and pop your shoes on for mummy please’, just try ‘shoes on please’.

I found this helped a huge amount and he started parroting us very quickly and before we knew it, he was chattering away without being prompted.

He’s now 2 years and 8 months, full sentences are coming out, new words every day. He just caught up all of a sudden.

Obviously this is just my experience and hopefully things will go the same with your little one. I know how worrying it can be though, it sounds like you’re doing all the right things and in the meantime all we can do is let them run their own race.

I have a severely autistic son who is now an adult. Apart from no speech at that age he had absolutely no understanding, he was very “good”. Just used to sit and play on his own, never really cried, never did anything “naughty”. Looking back he was too “good”.

My daughter was born when he was 7 years old. She was silent, very slow to reach milestones. She never babbled. At 2 she was referred for speech therapy. However she understood what we said and could follow 2 step commands. Just before she turned 3 she finally said a word. I was worried sick about her being autistic too. Once she said the first word more words came quickly. By the time she started school she was speaking in sentences but was missing key sounds so was hard to hard to understand. I can report she is now a typical teenager. She was diagnosed with severe dyslexia though and late milestones and speech are an indicator of this.

My son (1st child) had amazing understanding at 18 months onwards, but said barely anything. We were worried, nursery mentioned speech therapy, etc. Just before he was 3, he started talking and hasn't stopped since. He's 4 now. On the other hand, my daughter, who is now 2, has been talking non stop since she was 1. Sometimes they just take their own time.

I could have written the exact same post as you, too. The health visitor told me that they'd actually moved the two-year check to the 27 ninth check because so many children weren't meeting the speech and language milestone by 24 months. They checked their understanding and saw that it was on target but their speech was behind. I asked for a referral to SALT and the HV obliged. It took about six weeks for SALT to get in touch and by that point it was completely irrelevant as she suddenly had a speech explosion and literally hasn't stopped talking since. The activities the SALT suggested were things like naming body parts and animals but she was already talking in four-word sentences by then. A friend of mine had a three year old that wasn't saying anything clearly and she said she'd been told that in NT children, speech development is stand-alone and isn't connected to any other developmental leaps in children.
As long as you have no other concerns then I'll bet that in a couple of months your lad will be chatting away and you'll be wishing for five minutes' peace!

Hey OP, my son was similar. When I watch videos back of him aged about 2 and a half it makes me want to cry because you literally cannot understand a word and yet he's babbling like he really had something to say. He had a few other issues too and early intervention was, I think, absolutely key in getting him supported and caught up. He was diagnosed with ASD as he went into reception and has been supported so much by the school and the special needs support team. He is about to go into year 4 now and he is absolutely thriving. He works at the expected level in English and above that for maths. He has his quirks but he's doing so, so well. I just wanted to reassure you that even if your son is behind with his speech now, and even if he does have some addition needs, getting the support and any necessary assessments early is brilliant. You're doing so well.

At 2 and a half my daughter couldn't talk. At her hearing assessment I dropped something and she said "Whoopsy Daisy!" It turned out that she's a person who doesn't like to try things unless she's certain she can do it well, and she's very stubborn. When she started to talk it was in sentences and very clear and easy to understand.

My youngest was 2 in June and only says 6 words. His understanding is apparently above the expected level for his age (according to his SLT assessment).

He currently goes to a play session run by SLT and is waiting his formal appointment. Also waiting a ent referral too.

His brother was saying full sentences at the same age.

Id get onto salt asap, private if you can afford it. Iv had 3 with delayed speech. 2 resolved with salt and 1 needed intensive salt from 2 until 7, he has auditory processing issues and sever dyslexia as turns out. In great beleiver in early intervention and salt is fun games at that age.

That year between 2 and 3 is a really frustrating time if you have a child with additional needs, it's the time you know something is going on, but you aren't able to access any of the advice and support you really need.

I knew my DS a was autistic at age 2, but it wasn't until he turned 3 and went to state school nursery that everything kicked in in terms of diagnosis and help. My one wish is that I had taken him to the GP earlier and not taken no for an answer.

DD1 did not speak till at least that age; then it all came out in a flood. She knew how to do it but couldn't be bothered.

Ditto reading - very late starter and just not interested, then I caught her reading The Wind in the Willows one day. I asked if she could understand it and she said "Oh yes." She was waiting for something a bit more inspiring than school readers I think!

I hope that your DS begins to communicate soon - they mostly do in their own time.

@Hankunamatata

Id get onto salt asap, private if you can afford it. Iv had 3 with delayed speech. 2 resolved with salt and 1 needed intensive salt from 2 until 7, he has auditory processing issues and sever dyslexia as turns out. In great beleiver in early intervention and salt is fun games at that age.

This is why I pushed for referral even though I was given all the same advice about "they'll do it when they're ready." or "so-and-so was a late talker and she hasn't stopped since!" I've a dear friend who was in the same position and while her DS is doing amazingly well with SALT, she regrets not doing it sooner.

If your DS doesn't need it, then it just becomes something extra you did and no harm done. And if he does, you'll have given a good start.

I could have written this post almost 8 yrs ago. Coming up 2, my eldest son would only say about 6 words and if he managed to learn a new word he'd drop another one off the list. His main sound was a "ta " or grunt with a point whenever he wanted anything. We had his hearing tested at 2, which came back fine. I was also watching for signs of autism. Then suddenly at 2yr 1m he just started speaking in small sentences. He's now coming up 11 , academically very able and other than being a stroppy preteen has no problems at home or school. The only thing is even now he's a bit reluctant to try anything new if he hasn't completely got it correct in his head and knows he can do it. I just think he's always cautious about doing new things until he feels ready (whereas DS2 just throws himself into everything without a second thought!)

My dd was the same, paid for private SALT assessment at 27 months at which stage she had maybe 20 words she would say at a push. Her speech just took off after this anyway.

Tips were:
Lots of signing
Lots of games with repetitive words (eg. Pop up pirate so you say all the colours over and over)
Keep a list of words so you can see the improvement

Luckily we didn't need audiology in the end- over a year past referral they finally called up to offer an appointment. Absolutely shocking.

My 3 year old wasn't saying very much at 2. I think we got his first word just before or just after being bye (thanks teletubbies).

He now has about 50 words and is having speech therapy. At his assessment she called it language delay and didn't think there were any special needs concerns.

From a year ago we have seen so much progress and that was a key milestone we were told by one therapist. We can expect him to catch up immediately but he just improve.

To help we were recommended to simplify our language and lots of play together.

I understand how you feel. Our son was virtually silent at 2 and now we are trying to teach him volume control while he shouts loudly.

Thank you all so much for taking the time to reply.

I really hope I can offer the same reassurance to somebody one day fingers crossed 🤞

On a selfish level I want to hear his wee voice but ultimately i just want him to have the support he needs. Thinking into the future and him going to school. The uncertainty is what’s so hard.

Yep! Mine didn't speak til gone three. He was the same refused to, then one day I was getting him into bed and he just spoke a three word sentence. I was stunned
can't even remember what he said looking back, but he's been a chatterbox ever since.

Hi - we were you 10 years ago. DS literally only said mama and dada. We were really stressed out but he finally broke through and he caught up fast. Every story is different but don't give up.

Funny story - his first new word was "more", after I gave him a biscuit. We all scrambled to get him some more!

My boy has just turned two.

I was worried about his lack of speech but doctors ruled out autism but I was still worried about particular traits of his coupled with the speech delay.

Yesterday I saw a SALT for an assessment (I seeked help from SALT when he was 18 months but was told he was too young) and she pointed out he was saying some words but was missing out the first consonant and you really had to listen hard to hear the words. He also did all the animal noises which he's never done for me before.

I asked her about a few other behaviours. He lines up cars like your little boy but she said that's fine as long he doesn't do it rigidly and can transition to other forms of play.

My son also communicates with 'hand leading' more than pointing and I had read this was a sign of autism. But she said this was also fine as he had multiple other forms of communication eg some pointing, reaching, eye contact, vocalising.

@HeyDuggeesFavouriteSquirrel

My boy has just turned two.

I was worried about his lack of speech but doctors ruled out autism but I was still worried about particular traits of his coupled with the speech delay.

Yesterday I saw a SALT for an assessment (I seeked help from SALT when he was 18 months but was told he was too young) and she pointed out he was saying some words but was missing out the first consonant and you really had to listen hard to hear the words. He also did all the animal noises which he's never done for me before.

I asked her about a few other behaviours. He lines up cars like your little boy but she said that's fine as long he doesn't do it rigidly and can transition to other forms of play.

My son also communicates with 'hand leading' more than pointing and I had read this was a sign of autism. But she said this was also fine as he had multiple other forms of communication eg some pointing, reaching, eye contact, vocalising.

That’s very encouraging. My son was doing a lot of hand leading around 2 and is now pointing/ gesturing with a shout or screech to what he wants. I haven’t had anyone rule out autism at our end, he’s still to see a paediatrician. His only flags were the lining up cars and dropping the couple of words/sounds he had at 1. His older brother lined up cars and trains at the same age. I’m curious about what his SALT will entail, will definitely report back.

Everyone will be desperate to reassure you that autism isn't in the running, if my experience is anything to go by. Our GP swore blind my child couldn't be autistic because I could make him laugh. Ffwd two years. My son is diagnosed with Level 2 (moderate) autism.

OP, forgive me if I have misread but did you say you had an older child? I had a similar issue with my two - DC1 very articulate, talking in full sentences at his two year check; DC2 absolutely miles behind in comparison at the same age (although just about ticking the boxes for the HV assessment). The problem was that DC1 was speaking for DC2 and “interpreting” the babbling etc. so DC2 didn’t get the chance to develop her language in the same way. I was concerned enough to raise the issue with nursery who said it is very common for parents to be worried about a second (and subsequent) child’s speech when compared to the first and that they would have retired to the Caribbean if they had £1 for every time a parent had raised this with them!

Anyway, DC2 is now almost three and her speech has improved exponentially in the last year - perhaps not a coincidence that DC1 is now at school so she gets more one-on-one time? Some PPs have given you some great tips for helping your son to develop his language skills - hopefully these will work and in six months time he will be chatting away!

Does he watch CBeebies? If he likes watching TV, have a look at YakaDee. It is a cartoon girl who is encouraging children to say a word. At first the child refuses but eventually has a try. He might respond better to a TV character asking him to try to say a word?
Obviously this isn't a replacement for all the other suggestions and activities, just an additional thing that might help?

My child was exactly the same, didn't speak at all and then VERY few words. I was seriously concerned until 3, still very worried from 3-4. Suddenly aged around 4 started chatting away, knew SO many words that my husband and I were shocked - stuff we hadn't taught, and have no idea where the information could have been learned! Wasn't until aged 4 that I stopped worrying and became pathetically grateful and overjoyed that DC was talking so much. Such a smart kid (and I'm not just saying that because it's my kid ) but must have been really quietly taking things in, paying attention, processing everything in own time etc. Very active child even when not speaking, creative, I think my DC was spending a lot of time figuring stuff out for themselves. Didn't speak until ready and had something to say.

Albert Einstein didn't speak until age 5! Please don't worry too much. You can search for a condition called Einstein Syndrome - it's a reassuring explanation for why a child is speaking very late. Children with this speak much later than their peers but when they do start speaking, catch up or overtake their peers, because they've spent so much time quietly absorbing information/figuring things out that they end up really smart.

We spend a lot of time focusing on WHEN our kids do things and we consider early to mean smart. But it doesn't - no correlation at all. Kids do things their own way whether we like it or not.

I really cant emphasise enough how little my DC was speaking until around 4 - and how worried I was. I know of at least two other children who were very similar.

If you're really worried, there is an app called gemiini (or something like this, basically the word gemini with two i's in one part gemiini or geminii - it's for children who aren't speaking for various reasons) and I tried this with my son. It really encouraged him to start making the effort with communicating. Maybe you can give that a go and see if your DC likes it too? If not, just give it time

Can I also just say, I said the same thinf about my DC - it seems like they're focusing on the physical learning and progress and speaking will come later. And it did. Forgot to add this in my first post so wanted to update as I feel like this similarity is really important

Some just like to wait until they've got it all worked out, I think. I was very late talking (a handful of words at 3, according to my parents), but was reading before I was 4, so the language development was clearly happening - just not out loud!