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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be upset

20 replies

crossedlegs · 09/08/2021 22:04

I was bullied when I was in high school due to my teeth. To clarify my teeth would actually be very nice as they are straight ect if it wasn't for me having massive gums and my teeth being really tiny.
I constantly got called 'gummy' and it still makes me really really self conscious. Obviously as I've got older it affects me less and less but I still make an effort to smile and not show my teeth for pictures.
On a recent Facebook post on a local group page I made a comment in reply to an elderly gentleman who said he was lonely and looking for company. So many of the comments were horrible and offensive that I just commented with a suggestion of local groups he could look on and then said to ignore any negative comments he was receiving.
I then got a comment in replying basically saying 'f**k off Gummy' and although it's been so long since the bullying and I'm past it, it has still made me really upset and conscious.
I'm trying to tell myself not to make a deal of it because I would never want my children to see that I am affected by some low life's comment online but it's hard not to feel hurt!

OP posts:
Yesitsbess · 09/08/2021 22:11

You ended up as a decent human being, they ended up as someone who still as an adult feels the need to put other people down to feel good about themselves.

I know these things can still cause hurt but that's my perspective on it. Rise above.

Original poster
crossedlegs · 09/08/2021 22:14

@Yesitsbess

You ended up as a decent human being, they ended up as someone who still as an adult feels the need to put other people down to feel good about themselves.

I know these things can still cause hurt but that's my perspective on it. Rise above.

Thank you that makes me feel better. I don't know why people feel the need to constantly make other people feel bad!
OP posts:
LagneyandCasey · 09/08/2021 22:14

So sorry, op. Some people are arseholes. I think the saying 'It says more about them than about you' is very true in these situations. I would feel sorry for the idiot who must have a shit life.

So sorry for the poor old gentleman too Sad.

GrrRightBackAtYou · 09/08/2021 22:15
Flowers You sound so lovely, all those people posting horrible things to a lonely old mans post, you added something helpful and nice. They turned on you because you being nice shone a light on how awful they were. They reverted back to the childish school bullies they were. What a sad little person they are. I’m sorry they were awful to you, I’m not surprised you feel hurt. Block those people so they won’t be able to see any of your future posts. You are a far better person than them Flowers
XenoBitch · 09/08/2021 22:18

Sorry to see this, OP. I am "gummy" too. Small teeth and big gums. It is not something we can help at all... so the knobs giving you shit for it are in the wrong here as their comments towards you can be helped, and they still chose to be cunts.

Original poster
crossedlegs · 09/08/2021 22:18

Thank you for the comments. I have spent the day researching oral surgeries so these comment have made me feel much better!
It's not about me it's obviously about them being not very nice people!

OP posts:
Dizzy1234 · 09/08/2021 22:21

Whoever posted that should be ashamed of themselves, don't let them upset you.
I had similar, put a comment on a fb post support of someone and a random bloke told me to buy some teeth whitener, he must have gone to the trouble of clicking on my profile to look at my photo, I actually have gum issues which means I can't use teeth whitening toothpastes / products, I'm a regular attendee at the dentist, my teeth are straight and clean just not pearly white.
These dickheads probably have wives, sisters, daughters and still attack woman on their looks, absolutely vile, I understand how upsetting it is as I felt awful reading his comment, don't let the haters get to you ❤️

StoneofDestiny · 09/08/2021 22:22

You must know the problem is with the bully. They have yet to evolve into a decent human being. Don't doubt yourself - some school bullies stay bullies for life.

Yesitsbess · 09/08/2021 22:22

You smile with pride. Your smile comes with an added bonus of a good heart so be proud.

Bethany7 · 09/08/2021 22:27

Please try and ignore these awful horrible people who must be very unhappy and lonely deep down. As my mum always says we should actually feel sorry for them! But I'm not saying that! But my point is please try and forget that one nasty comment.
Sending hugs

Cam2020 · 09/08/2021 22:52

Bloody hell, what sort of people respond with horrible or offensive posts to a lonely, elderly person's request for company? They sound sub-human!

They're pathetic individuals who are so unhappy in their own lives, they find enjoyment in making others unhappy too. They're really not worth your energy and for what it's worth, I'd take the big gums over being an utter shit-bag of a person any day.

Miniestelle · 09/08/2021 23:09

What absolute cunts. Do not give it a second thought, OP. Whoever said to you that is a human turd.

EKGEMS · 09/08/2021 23:27

I was bullied a lot over my overbite and those scars are still there despite 2.5 years of orthodontic intervention giving me a perfect smile. Ignore the cunts

IveNameChangedAgain2020 · 09/08/2021 23:32

Oh OP that's so awful. I can't believe grown adults would behave like that especially as you were being so kind. I also came on to say that my friend has a gummy smile and it's been fixed with Botox. Might not be your thing at all but it might xx

unim · 09/08/2021 23:34

Sorry if this is a silly thing to say, but reading your post it occurred to me that one of my good friends at primary school had very visible gums and small teeth. She had such a lovely nature and a wide smile that always made other people want to smile along with her too. My memory of her is of a really kind, beautiful, funny person who always made me want to smile. I am so sorry you were teased; you sound really lovely and kind.

For different reasons, I am also insecure about my appearance, but I love this Roald Dahl quote and certainly find it to be very true of the people who I know:

“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.

A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

shg96 · 09/08/2021 23:51

People are horrible! You sound like a beautiful human inside and out. Don’t let it get you down. 🧡

Birminghambloke · 10/08/2021 00:03

That person has only shown themselves up on that thread and to all own FB followers.

Handsoffstrikesagain · 10/08/2021 00:08

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

MyrrAgain · 10/08/2021 00:36

Pathetic person who has nothing better to do with their lives. They go low, you go high. nothing to do with you now, you are a normal, mature person living their kind life. Block them and don't engage.

Original poster
crossedlegs · 10/08/2021 07:49

Thank you for all the lovely comments ❤️

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