to not take 6mth and 2 yr old to evening party?

[mrschop]

is a Xmas party (adults and kids) starting at 7.30. Both are usually asleep by that time, 2.10yr old doesn't sleep during day and so takes himself to bed saying he's tired at 6.45! Think they will either fall asleep on the way and/or will be nightmare when they get there. Is a family party - IL's - and think they are disappointed we're not going, MIL in particular as understandably she wants to show them off to the more distant rellies. Feel slightly bad but think it will just be a nightmare with overtired kids. Is different if we are already out somewhere and stay past bedtime, but to take them out when usually they're asleep is different.

Why not the 2.10 year old?? My Ds is the same age and would be the life and soul!

Not the 6mo obviously, but Mrschop's toddler is nearly 3 - old enough to remember at least odd details of a big event.

I will def take them when they are older - is an annual party, and I think next year DS will be nearly 4 and better able to cope (he's only recently dropped his daytime sleep so is at the stage of just getting by without it). I agree family parties etc, esp at Christmas, do leave lots of lovely memories - my DH remembers these parties from when he was a child. But this year it seems quite a lot of hassle (6mth old in and out of the car in the cold etc) for what cd be a bit of a flying visit to the party.

But on the other hand, I'm usually really keen to invite, and take our, children everywhere - I feel mildly put out at non-child weddings etc, although the fact I want to be sure they'll behave is perhaps based on me not wanting to give ammunition to those who think children should be left at home all the time!

And more importantly, to enjoy it, as others have said!

Message withdrawn

I suggest you see how it all is on the day, tell the IL's you're really not sure how DS will be on that day, try and get him to sleep during the day, a long walk and a drive home normally knackers my little one out.

If on the day you think he'll cope ok with it, then by all means go and have a great time, if you don't think he will then don't go, at least that way you won't go and be mightily annoyed that it hasn't gone to plan or not go and be at home with a toddler who for some unknown reason is wide awake at 7:30 (sod's law!!)and you've decided not to go!

It's not like the party isn't going to go ahead without you, so if you do manage to go then it will be an added bonus ratehr than everything being messed up because you had to pull out at the last minute.

Aren't we all so different?

I'd definitely take the 2.10 year old but I'd probably not want to go with the 6 month old. This is probably because ds would never sleep at 6 months old and was really grizzly for it. We did actually take jhim out in the evenings quite a lot but I can honestly say I never enjoyed it. I would take him now though as I know he'd enjoy it and so would I.

Ds is now 3 (last week) and also doesn't sleep in the day. However if I make sure he gets up before 7am and then drive him somewhere at about 3pm he will usually fall asleep in the car and can now be transferred to bed for a late nap and wake him 2-3 hours later if he hadn't woken first so that is what I'd do.

Uusally I try and avoid ds falling asleep in the car at 3/4pm as it makes bedtime a nightmare but in this instance it would work quite well.

I appreciate that may not work for you as all children are different

dd1 used to be in a routine, a strict one due to my PFB tendencies

Xmas day came, I am fretting about serving of dinner clashing with naps etc and chocolate overload

day was FAB, no nap, went with the flow

as a one off, I think you should go

can you go the long way round so they nap on the way?

I suggest you see how it all is on the day, tell the IL's you're really not sure how DS will be on that day, try and get him to sleep during the day, a long walk and a drive home normally knackers my little one out.

If on the day you think he'll cope ok with it, then by all means go and have a great time, if you don't think he will then don't go, at least that way you won't go and be mightily annoyed that it hasn't gone to plan or not go and be at home with a toddler who for some unknown reason is wide awake at 7:30 (sod's law!!)and you've decided not to go!

It's not like the party isn't going to go ahead without you, so if you do manage to go then it will be an added bonus ratehr than everything being messed up because you had to pull out at the last minute.

oops it posted twice

Yes, Victorian Squalor, it's the 30min drive at bedtime which is the killer. Once he's asleep he'll be a real grouch when woken.
But I like your idea of getting there while the party is being set up - it is in a hall and there will be music and balloons etc, and all the family who'll really like to see the children will be there doing all the work beforehand, so we cd pop over then and see how we get on, before it get busy later.

i would put them in there pj's and go. you don't have to stay long.families are important and it's not always pratical for long distance relatives to get there for the day. both mine are flexable for about 2 hours (they are 2 and 4).

I think the getting there early idea would be the way to go if you want to attend by the sound of it.

I think the plan of going early is an excellent compromise.

Mrschop YANBU I agree with some others if you can take them before hand and keep them up a wee bit later then i am sure they will be fine to come home after an hour and fall asleep in the car BUT i wouldn't take mine after bedtime and it too really annoys me when people expect you to and tell you that they will be fine. And tbh THEY probably will be but you probably won't be able to relax and enjoy it. I would get a babysitter and if IL s want a party to show off their GCs then they should organise it for during the day! Enjoy whatever you do