To be upset at being called cold?

[Mellowbee]

A couple of weeks ago I was getting
my 2 year old DD a frozen yoghurt out the pa k in the freezer. While picking she was going “this is a baby one, this is a daddy one’ etc. She’s picked one said “this is a mummy one’ took hold of it them said “it’s cold”

My DH started to laugh saying “ out of the mouth of babes” and interpreting as it was a mummy one because it was cold. Not it was a mummy one.full stop it’s cold. I told him that wasn’t the context DD said it in but he still carried on with it.

Whi has makes me think my husband and only child think I’m cold? For info I work 4 days and sh works 5 so I assume her preference for him is because she does get a whole day alone with hom like she does with me.

But what if it’s because I’m a cold person and don’t realise?

Am I going to be scaring my daughter for life by being a cold parent?

Your daughters comments were unrelated
She cannot possibly describe a person as cold and understand the meaning of that. It has nothing to do with you working.

Your dh may think you’re cold though, have you asked him why he thinks that?
Do you think you’re cold?

She's 2 years old.
She's talking about the temperature of the yogurt pot.
No way does a 2 year old understand the concept of cold hearted.
The fact you have concerns and have posted here shows you're anything but cold.

I don’t think I am. I think I cuddle our Dd all the time, including to sleep, respond to her every need. Marriage has been neglected a bit with lockdown, going back to work and moving house but everyone’s had a hard 2 years really?

Cold is how my husband frequently referred to me, could it have been a dig?
I hope not. Xx

Are you serious?! It was obviously a joke, how do people live their lives being so easily upset/2nd guessing everything. Also OBVIOULSY your daughter was talking about the temperature!

Your daughter wouldn’t understand and wouldn’t mean it, but in the way you said, so mummy ine, full stop, it’s cold as in the yoghurt feels cold

However it appears you do have a problem with your husband, so you need to talk to him

Good grief, how do people have the headspace for such overthinking?

Obviously to a normal person that’s what she meant. Problem is my husband thought “haha she’s referring to you” and when I’ve root it up again sticks bu it.so he thinks I’m cold and thinks our toddler could thing I’m cold, even if she doesn’t understand the word in context that’s what she’s think

'Cold' to mean 'emotionally detatched' is way too advanced for a 2 year old. She isn't old enough yet to get metaphor like that and she isn't really old enough to understand the concept of emotional detachment. She meant cold as in the temperature - god knows why, cold hands? Are you always putting a jumper on? Had you said at any point in the last few days that you were a bit cold? She's 2, they say absolutely all sorts - my 3 year old goddaughter told me her mummy was a killer the other day because she'd heard it on the news and I'm fairly sure my best friend isn't a murderer.

So your child isn't the problem here. Your DH... well. Either you actually are a more reserved person and he was having a (not especially funny) joke, or he was having an actual dig. I wouldn't let it get to you unless you think he's legitimately being mean.

Don't most men make jokes about the wife from time to time? You seem to be massively overthinking it, I wouldn't have given it a second thought.

My DP and I make jokes like that about each other all the time.

He jokes I'm "cold hearted" all the time - I couldn't be further from that and he knows that aswell, it's just joking. I honestly wouldn't give it headspace, you're massively overthinking

My DB sings the song "You're as cold as ice' at me occasionally which DH guffaws at. I was like at first but now own it

I don't think on this occasion this is what was meant here, is there anything else going on OP to which this might have hit a nerve?

Surely it was a joke? It’s something my husband would have said - but we have a relationship where we jokingly insult each other all the time, and know we don’t mean it. Presumably you don’t have that kind of relationship, so maybe it was a joke, maybe it was a dig. We can’t know. But it’s impossible for a 2yo to understand “cold” as an insult.

Your 2 year old won't understand what cold means other than the temperature.
Your DH sounds as if he was just making a joke...worst case he was being immature. I'd have just laughed it off.

Is there a massive back story here? Otherwise I just don't get it.

You DH made a joke; you didn't like it.

?

Your H was playing on words and joking .