We have three dc all four and under - the youngest being a breastfed not-quite-2 year old, who’s still a relatively poor sleeper - so naturally, I get very little in the way of ‘me’ time.
Of an evening, DH has the tendency to watch his shows, or will play something on the PS4 (which is connected to the tv in our lounge), leaving me sat there twiddling my thumbs, bored stiff.
There’s a game I like to play too on the PS4, which is also available to play on a P.C., so a few weeks ago, I got DH to download the P.C. version for me, so that I could take myself off to the bedroom a couple evenings per week, and play my game while he watches his things, and it would also (rather crucially) double up as a few hours completely on my own, to just switch off and unwind.
However, I’ve noticed that so far when I’ve decided to head up and play my game, it's no longer than half an hour later, and DH comes up and lays on the bed, either chatting away in my ear or playing videos out loud on his phone. I’ve asked him why he keeps coming up, when one of the reasons I started gaming on the P.C. was to allow him to watch his shows in peace, without me sat there eyerolling and sighing my way through another one of his series and he keeps saying he ‘gets lonely and bored on his own’.
Now, while one half of me finds this quite sweet, the other half wants to scream at him to leave me alone. From sunrise to sunset, I have 3 dc all over me, wanting things, non stop talking to me, so if I manage to find a few hours a couple evenings per week to just be myself, that’s exactly what I want to happen. I don’t expect to carve out some ‘me’ time, only to have DH follow me up and interrupt it.
I know that probably sounds horrible, and I should likely be thankful that I have a DH that just wants to spend time with me and talk to me, but I’m starting to feel so burnt out from constantly having people around me and never getting a moment to just be myself.
AIBU? I don't know if I'm being rude?
How can I tell dh, in the nicest possible way, that I need time on my own without hurting his feelings?