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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is my Mum being a bit OTT

42 replies

maplepie · 07/08/2021 22:43

I'm 21 and like with my parents, so basically earlier today I left the house to go out and took my set of keys with me but didn't lock the door when I left because my Mum was upstairs in the house ironing, my Dad was at work at this time. When I got back home I got a little reminder from my Mum saying that if someone is upstairs and no one is downstairs I should lock the door if I'm leaving the house. From now on I'll take my Mum's advice but was she being a bit OTT or was I being careless in not locking the door.

OP posts:
FortunesFave · 07/08/2021 22:45

It largely depends on where you live but generally, she's not being unreasonable at all.

I certainly don't leave my door open all day...anyone could walk in.

AllergictoWerewolves · 07/08/2021 22:47

It depends. Can the door be opened from the outside, without a key, if it isn't locked? If so then yes, you were unreasonable not to lock it knowing your Mum was upstairs and may not hear it open.

Ninkanink · 07/08/2021 22:47

Of course she’s not being being unreasonable to simply remind you to lock the door! Confused

pinkflamingo21 · 07/08/2021 22:47

I would lock it, it's nice to feel safe, you would regret not locking but you'll never regret locking it

pinkstripeycat · 07/08/2021 22:49

Lots of burglaries happen this way. A burglar will always try a door first before smashing glass and making a noise. Think about it, open door and grab a bag, lap top, phone, car easy and then leave as quickly and as quietly as they arrived. Burglars are very casual aswell. They will act as though the house is their own so no one notices them

Original poster
maplepie · 07/08/2021 22:50

I will be locking it from now on and definitely I can see my Mum's viewpoint, would never forgive myself if something happened and I hadn't locked the door.

OP posts:
MedusasBadHairDay · 07/08/2021 22:51

I think it depends on your area and why someone is upstairs. Basically, would they be aware or vulnerable if someone came in? So I'd lock the door if they were asleep or in the bath for example.

Personally I probably wouldn't lock a door if someone was upstairs ironing.

SuperCaliFragalistic · 07/08/2021 22:51

I don't lock the door when at home in the daytime generally unless I know no one is going out again that night. Neither of my parents do either but I know a few friends who think it's really important. I think your mum is a bit OTT personally but if it makes her feel safer then it's fair enough

TheSmallAssassin · 07/08/2021 22:51

We always lock the doors if we're going out and no-one is downstairs, as others have said, plenty of opportunistic burglaries happen this way.

LemonRoses · 07/08/2021 22:51

Never lock our doors when we are in. Don’t often if we’re out either. Just depends where you live and how anxious you are about crime.

MedusasBadHairDay · 07/08/2021 22:52

Forgot to add, I've mostly lived in safer areas though. My DH would lock the door because he hasn't

goose1964 · 07/08/2021 22:52

We don't lock our door when someone's in but we live in one of the safest places in England.

Tulips15 · 07/08/2021 22:53

I live in a very ' safe' place with lovely neighbours.

I always lock the door when I come in and go out (when someone else inside/upstairs.

mum11970 · 07/08/2021 22:55

Depends where you live. Unlocked doors aren’t unusual where I live.

user1471453601 · 07/08/2021 22:56

I live I a fairly low crime area, but I agree with your mum. Lock the door.

I'm v v hard of hearing, I listen to radio/tv through overhead earphones. My daughter and her partner know that someone walking into my living room would have to walk into my direct eyeline before I knew they were there, so even an open window, when I'm alone, could be dangerous.

ladygracie · 07/08/2021 22:57

If someone is awake (& know that I’m going out) when I leave then I leave the door unlocked. But as others have said, it totally depends where you live.

HollowTalk · 07/08/2021 22:57

If you can see her viewpoint, what's the point of this thread?

Aquamarine1029 · 07/08/2021 22:57

Always lock the door when you leave, regardless if someone is home or not.

Sally872 · 07/08/2021 22:58

Very sensible. Not ott at all, but even if it was if it makes your mum feel better and minimal inconvenience to you it shouldn't matter.

oknowimscared · 07/08/2021 22:59

Always, always lock the door. No matter where you are. Sneak thieves love an unlocked door. Round here, before the cuts, the local PCSOs would turn up unannounced in people’s houses to push the point home (I do think that was a step too far, personally, and hope no-one had a heart attack!)

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 07/08/2021 23:01

@pinkflamingo21

I would lock it, it's nice to feel safe, you would regret not locking but you'll never regret locking it
Unless there's a fire and the person locked in can't find their key, break a window, or climb out the window.
ancientgran · 07/08/2021 23:03

My husband is a retired police officer. He's been a scenes of crime officer and a detective among other roles. We always have the door locked, day or night, upstairs or downstairs. If people want to come into the house he wants to know about it. He has seen some terrible things so he definitely wouldn't say your mother was OTT.

HideousKinky · 07/08/2021 23:03

No she was not being OTT.
Yes you should have locked the door.

DoubleShotEspresso · 07/08/2021 23:04

We always lock our door and put the chain on when we are home or out.

ancientgran · 07/08/2021 23:04

Unless there's a fire and the person locked in can't find their key, break a window, or climb out the window. I suppose it depends on your locks, we can have ours so that you open the door as if it is unlocked from the inside but from outside you need a key, or we can double lock it so you need a key from the inside as well, we never do that.