to be annoyed at the text my older Sister just set me re; Christmas presents?

[ATortIsForLifeNotJustChristmas]

Basically said don't bother to buy xxx (My nephew) a present. Spend it on yours (meaning my 4 dc) and say its from me (herself!)
And on the end- thanks for xxx birthday present, you didn't have to.

Well i am annoyed! For a start i know i didnt have to give DN some money for his Birthday. I did it becaus i wanted to!

And why should i buy something nice for my DC and sayits from her?

I think it's depressing when it's all about money too. My MIL and SIL are absolutely rigorous about AN AMOUNT for ds, if they get the PERFECT present for him and it's half price, they'll go round buying other bits to make up THE AMOUNT Bless their hearts, it's very sweet, but I do find it a bit odd and unecessary. If the perfect thing for ds is £2.50, it's still perfect, to him!

I have replied to her text basically saying that i ave bought for xxxx already but she doesn't have to buy for mine if she cant or does't want to!

Honoria - thank goodness someone sane out there. I don't have a Christmas budget I just try to get everybody on my list something that I think they will like. Be it £2.50 from Save the Children charity shop or £42 from Jo Malone (grrrrr).

atorte........did you get a reply back from your sis?

Nope! No reply from her.
Now need to think of a gift for a 11 yr old boy.

id be glad! im desperately trying to cut down on xmas presents now im not earning. To be honest id rather spend my money on DS than someone elses!! might not have been best way to put it, my mate did same last year and i was so annoyed! now i think thank god! She doesn't want you to buy for her children as she feels that she is put in position to have to buy back.

Sorry but FGS - just ring each other rather than text?!?!?!?!?!?

lol wilkie I think that's a very good idea! A quick chat might really help here!

Since it's family, I don't think there need be all this "you buy for us so we have to buy for you" - again, it's making it all about money. Surely a sister ought to be free to say "Sorry, we're really strapped this year we just can't". We've done that in my family before; if you can't afford it and the other person still wants to buy for you/ your kids, you should accept that graciously I think.

I had to tell my sis this year that I can only afford to spend £10 each on my DT neices. She has gone ahead and spent £20 on my DS. Fair enough. It is her perogative and lovely that she can afford to do that. Sadly I'm not in that position but having chatted about it initially there is no problem on either side.

Text and email are not good for discussions of this nature as neither party really knows if there is any underlying agenda on the others part and it can cause bad feeling as it has done here!!!

Surely, if you buy something and then tell your DC it's from her, that wouldn't be true would it?

Me and my SIL do this every year!!! It means that we can buy our DC's something we know they will like and as we have large families we both spend enough time trailing round the shops wondering "would such and such like this?"

It's just a timesaver tbh and I didn't feel put out when she first suggested this.

This year she has asked that we don't buy for her and bil as they can't afford to buy back but my dh is insisting we get them something anyway as you "don't give to receive" which leaves me in the dilemma will she be embarassed when we hand them over.

Have you just woken up from a 17 year coma where you were mid typing?

This nephew is now 28. Wonder what he got for Xmas off his Aunty when he was 11?

Oh, this is the Alastair troll. They've popped up on a few other threads today