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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think friend is having a dig? Or am I being paranoid

14 replies

Firefliesinabottle · 05/08/2021 22:20

Close friend, we’ve know each other for around 4 years. For context, DH and I have been unable to get on the property ladder so are renting, while she’s recently bought her own house.

Friend sent me a text last night with a picture of a flat that’s close to where I live, saying how she surprised that the rent was so much. I texted back agreeing that rent prices were sky high, and it’s hard for people to buy when they’re forking out so much in rent every month. She then carried on by saying that the area is full of “dossers” (it isn’t?)… I didn’t want to bite, as it seemed like she was in a funny mood and perhaps wanted a reaction. I replied that the area DH and I live in seems alright and we’ve had no issues, and changed the subject asking how her day has been. She then sent another message (ignoring what I’d asked) talking about the area again saying god knows why people want to live there.

Feeling a bit Hmm at the whole situation, and haven’t replied as I really don’t know what to say? DH says I’m reading too much into it and she was just shocked at the renting prices, but I’ve taken is as a dig at me, for no reason at all. Just a bit shocked as we’re close, so I don’t understand why she’d want to try and hurt my feelings/piss me off?

Happy for someone to talk some sense into me and tell me to stop being so sensitive!

OP posts:
FortunesFave · 05/08/2021 22:22

She sounds awful. Is she usually like this? She's probably got above herself having managed to buy and enjoys feeling superior.

I would reduce time spent with someone like that or not bother at all!

Katekarate · 05/08/2021 22:24

How rude! Tell her you don't like where she lives either. So out of order just makes you wonder what people are thinking.

H8theW8 · 05/08/2021 22:26

Maybe she just genuinely feels that the rent is high for an area she doesn't personally consider desirable. She is being rude but maybe not intentionally. You know her so will know best whether she is being a dick or just engaging her mouth before her brain.

Firefliesinabottle · 05/08/2021 22:27

She has made a few really subtle digs in the past, I’m trying to think of them off the top of my head but can’t remember!

And that’s it, I think if I were to say anything about the area she lived in she’d get very defensive! So really unsure why she’s decided to text me out of the blue to have a pop Confused

OP posts:
3scape · 05/08/2021 22:28

I'm.not subtle, I'd tackle her head on with some comment about her trying to start an argument and is she ok.

Firefliesinabottle · 05/08/2021 22:30

The thing is, she lived in this area for 30+ years before buying her own house. Unsure why the sudden negativity for it now.

OP posts:
HeckyPeck · 05/08/2021 22:32

I would reply with "Have you forgotten I live in this area?" & see what she replies with.

MaMelon · 05/08/2021 22:35

@HeckyPeck

I would reply with "Have you forgotten I live in this area?" & see what she replies with.
I’d do this. She sounds v thoughtless and quite rude - time to gently pull her up on it.
ThorsMistress · 05/08/2021 22:44

I would reply ‘it was ok for the 30+ years you lived here. What’s changed?’

50ShadesOfCatholic · 05/08/2021 22:52

I would ignore. Don't play into her drama. Is she normally such a bitch?

lannistunut · 05/08/2021 22:56

I'd ignore too, she clearly hasher own issues.

Inaseagull · 05/08/2021 22:57

I doubt she will be able to read your text, what with her head being so far up her own arse.

Wingingit573 · 06/08/2021 10:46

No I don't like this and you're not being unreasonable....

I had a 'friend' who decided to try and convince me to get an abortion when I found out I was pregnant because I didn't own my own home Hmm because obviously I couldn't provide for a child if I couldn't afford to buy a house.

Her comments started out very similar to your friends.... Blush

Me and this girl aren't friends anymore, And I had my baby and I still rent my house 😂

ZenNudist · 06/08/2021 10:47

Not much of a friend. Do you like her? I'd drop her.

Thus is a good place for the classic "did you mean to be so rude?"

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