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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ideas from teenage girl mums

76 replies

Lou898 · 04/08/2021 21:57

Just need some help as I’m struggling. I have two boys so I’m clueless. It’s my 17 year old sons girlfriends birthday and I don’t know her that well (with lockdown etc) but would like to buy her a gift, she’ll be 17. I bought her a personalised make- up case and put some beauty wipes and make up brushes in it at Christmas, as it was a very new relationship and thought that was something most girls would be happy with but now I’m stuck. She’s not heavily into make up, my sons useless with ideas so hoping mumsnet might be a better help.
Budget £25-30.

OP posts:
SaltySheepdog · 04/08/2021 22:41

Some woolly socks and a nightie

Benjispruce5 · 04/08/2021 22:42

ASOS gift card.

PoodleJ · 04/08/2021 22:45

I’ll be honest at that age they don’t all like the same thing. Just play it safe and ask your son. Perhaps vouchers for some food place they like to eat at?

peachescariad · 04/08/2021 22:46

DD had small travel jewellery box as an 18th pressie and absolutely loves it.

Nails Inc...just gorgeous

Across body leather bag

Wilkolampshade · 04/08/2021 22:52

Definitely NOT cheap body spray, she'll have her own idea of a preferred perfume by now.
Superfluffy dressing gown or silky shorty p.j set a good plan. Xx

ShaunaTheSheep · 04/08/2021 22:53

DD's go-to gift for friends is birthstone silver earrings from Etsy (the real stones, not crystals). Or a silver necklace with carefully chosen pendant. So, personalised but subtle.

Kite22 · 04/08/2021 22:53

@UserStillatLarge

Teenagers like money. Or a gift card. If you don't know her that well (can your son really not give you any ideas??) then anything suggested on here might be terribly wrong.

I'm sure you've factored this in, but £25-30 is a lot for a teen girlfriend in my world; is there any danger she might be embarrassed by how much you've spent?

This ^

that is a lot of money to spend on someone you don't really have any relationship with.

Can you not just get her some chocs or flowers ?
Spending a lot of money on her now creates awkwardness in her thinking she will then need to get you something when it is your birthday, or her parents feeling pressured to get your ds something.

daisypond · 04/08/2021 23:00

I have a late teen girl. Definitely would not want make-up or nail varnish or body spray or perfume.
Possibly would want pjs or slippers or a reusable water bottle or subtle jewellery from Etsy.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 04/08/2021 23:03

A card for eg Pizza Express so she and your son can go for a meal?

I don’t have a daughter but teach girls this age and water bottles/coffee cups are a big thing. I also noticed a lot of fancy scented hand gel which would NEVER have been a thing before!

Puffalicious · 04/08/2021 23:09

My go to gift for ANY teen- boy or girl- is a SHO or Chilly's bottle. Always goes down a storm. If she has one, going on best friend's 3 girls: PJs/ stationery/ gift card/ cinema card/ Spotify thingy.

My DS's gf's 16th I got her a Clinique mascara/ eye-liner set as she may not have bought herself a more expensive brand like that.

Notimeforaname · 04/08/2021 23:14

Gift card/voucher definitely.

BiBabbles · 04/08/2021 23:15

My teenagers and many of their friends have online wishlists - through amazon or similar - and that's how my 16-year-old tends to pick gifts for his friends so I'd ask him if she has anything like that.

Notimeforaname · 04/08/2021 23:15

As a teenager all you want is cash or the means to buy things. Grin

Malteser71 · 04/08/2021 23:15

Cord tote bag from urban outfitters.

Passthewinebottle · 04/08/2021 23:16

I have three girls & even I'm saving this thread 👌🏼🤣

budgun · 04/08/2021 23:21

I'm sure you've factored this in, but £25-30 is a lot for a teen girlfriend in my world; is there any danger she might be embarrassed by how much you've spent?

Why would she be embarrassed? I genuinely can't see where that comes from.

beigebrownblue · 04/08/2021 23:24

gift card so she can choose herself. job done

vegas888 · 04/08/2021 23:46

I have a 17 year old daughter and gifts so would like would be a wagamama voucher, candles, bubble tea gift card, cinema tickets or maybe some beauty treatments/pampering.

ikeepseeingit · 04/08/2021 23:50

I would say Costa/Starbucks/cinema gift card, whichever one is closer to you or more useful to her. It can be used a few times, as an outing with friends or your son. Or ASOS and then she could buy herself makeup or clothes. £25 seems like a lovely amount for a gift, I don't think she would be embarrassed at all!

New2ctc · 04/08/2021 23:52

Most of these ideas aren't suitable for many girls, none I know watch Love Island, several are dismissive of corporate brands like Starbucks or coffee places, some don't wear make-up, don't set foot in Primark (child labour principles) - only you know what your son and she are like / believe. Principles are big at this age!
Like a pp said, lovely chocolates, a card and a cold hard £20 note will always be appreciated at this age, far more than a body spray or perfume might be.
By Xmas you'll know about her favourite perfume and can do that then!

daisypond · 05/08/2021 00:02

Yes, Most late teens I know are very ethical -No big-business coffee chains, no makeup, no fast fashion, no leather, chocs only if they are vegan etc. Cinema voucher should be OK, plus Wagamama, as pp suggested.

Blueberry40 · 05/08/2021 07:40

I bought my son’s 16yr old gf a boba tropical bubble tea kit from Etsy so she could make her own bubble teas. Was about £25 and she loved it. Other idea was an urban outfitters gift voucher.

UserStillatLarge · 05/08/2021 08:06

@budgun

I'm sure you've factored this in, but £25-30 is a lot for a teen girlfriend in my world; is there any danger she might be embarrassed by how much you've spent?

Why would she be embarrassed? I genuinely can't see where that comes from.

Because she doesn't want to accept such an expensive gift from someone she hardly knows (if that's expensive in OP's circles; it would be in mine) but probably doesn't have the maturity to express it.

Because she may feel obliged to start buying gifts for family members.

Because they may split up next week and then she may feel guilty about you having spent money on her.

Because OP's DS may not have spent so much on her.

Because her parents and/or other family members may not have spent so much on her.

I have a 17 year old and I don't even know when his girlfriend's birthday is. I have to admit that even if I did it wouldn't occur to me to buy her more than a card and a box of chocs.

A teen girlfriend (unless they have been together for years or something) is not the same as an established adult girlfriend of an adult child.

budgun · 05/08/2021 08:43

Oh, I would have just said thank you and enjoyed the gift tbh.