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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask if you remember your last breast feed with dc or even knew it was

93 replies

Rosebyanothername19 · 31/07/2021 19:43

Firstly, how you feed your child is your business and I have absolutely no judgment any which way. This is a question for those who chose to bf and to some extent chose when to stop.

My LO is 2 1/2 and I love having her fall asleep on me and every now and again coming out with the most random things in her half asleep state. It's a special little time we have at the end of every day and one of the things I miss most when she is staying with her GPs

So I was just wondering if people made that conscious decision to stop or did your LO just decide one day to stop? Did you know that their last feed was going to be their last?

If you made thr decision, how did you know it was the right time and do you remember the last one?

OP posts:

Pombearsforthewin · 31/07/2021 20:29

yes… picked a date and stuck to it. Earlier than I would have liked really… woke up two days later with two fried eggs for boobs. They simply deflated…

TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 31/07/2021 20:32

Yes, because he was on a nursing strike that we never recovered from!

Yesitsbess · 31/07/2021 20:33

Don't remember DD stopping but she was about 9 months. DS was around 18 months and I was fed up of him getting overexcited about being fed because he clamped his jaws down and he had sharp teeth!

Luckily he really loved all foods and was happy to use his bottle after that. Usually as a trumpet.

Darkstar4855 · 31/07/2021 20:35

I was close to stopping and had weaned down to one feed at bedtime only. My son was 2.5y. One night he was really tired and fell asleep without a feed. I saw that as an opportunity and stopped feeding at that point and just had cuddles at bedtime instead. So I can remember my last feed but I didn’t know at the time that it was my last one. No regrets and I didn’t feel sad - I don’t think I even realised how ready I was to stop until it happened!

BorderlineHappy · 31/07/2021 20:35

I remember with my youngest,i picked a date and went with it.
He was about 16 months old.But i had enough at that stage.
He had started waking back up for feeds during the night.And i was just knackered.
So i stopped.

Recessed · 31/07/2021 20:35

I remember the last time with DD2 as I was pumping after I put her down to bed and the pump pinched my boob and I ended up flinging the thing against the wall and yelled "fuck this I'm done!!" not my finest moment! My husband looked a bit scared and practically whispered "stop if you want to" so I did. It had been 12 months of nothing but hassle and I was so glad to stop feeling like a dairy cow! I loathed breastfeeding the entire time though (clearly!) so I'm not the best to take advice from.

tiredanddangerous · 31/07/2021 20:35

Yes I planned to stop at 6 months. I didn't enjoy breastfeeding and didn't feel at all sad about stopping!

BuffySummersReportingforSanity · 31/07/2021 20:38

Yes, I remember my last feed with both. With DC1 I was 16 weeks pregnant with his younger sibling and didn't fancy either tandeming or the known effect of colostrum on toddler bowels. He had tapered down a lot and then one day I just distracted him with a story and that was that. With DC2 I made a deliberate decision to go away for the weekend, he was down to a few token sucks before bed. I didn't offer when I came back and he didn't look for it.

Fed both to over 2 and they were lovely times, although it was also lovely to get my body back after 5+ years of it belonging to babies.

gamerchick · 31/07/2021 20:40

Mine was 3 1/2. I went away for a week without him and just didn't start again when I came back.

Was nice to have my body back have to admit.

AertexShirt · 31/07/2021 20:42

Dc1 was barely breastfed at all and I don't remember the exact moment I ditched bf altogether (not an easy time for many reasons).

With DC2 I deliberately stopped at around 20 months in a vain attempt to get a decent night's sleep. I don't remember the last feed but I do remember feeling v emotional when I told her that she was a big girl and didn't need mummy's milk any more. She just shrugged and wandered off - she was (still is!) always pretty vocal about things that she wasn't happy about so I can only assume she wasn't all that bothered!

Veryverycalmnow · 31/07/2021 20:44

I have fond memories of those times too. DS stopped by himself a few days before he turned 3. I was waiting for him to let me know he was ready to stop, but I was definitely ready by then... One night he had a tiny bit and then kind of wrinkled his nose up and moved away. We still have a cuddle in the same chair before bed each night.

Foghead · 31/07/2021 20:45

I chose a date and stuck to it too. 11 months. due to going back to work after 12 months mat leave. I was so happy and felt free.

RedHelenB · 31/07/2021 20:47

With my youngest we were on holiday and I realised he hadn't asked for a few feeds so I offered him another drink instead because much as I loved feeding all mine at 14 months he didn't really need or want it and I was ready to have my body back to myself.

ItsAllBlahBlahBlah · 31/07/2021 20:54

Both my boys stopped at 17 months. At both stages I had had enough, I didn't force them to stop but I didn't encourage it either. If I am honest I had become annoyed by it, I think because they were bigger and pulled me, grabbed me, were difficult to hold etc, they just felt 'too big' to me. By no means casting any opinion on others who breastfeed longer, I sincerely take my hat off to you! But once I didn't openly expect them to feed at bedtime, they both sort of shrugged it off and accepted it and that was that
I don't remember the magic of the last feed but more the sincerity that I was going to stop. Sad really but I did love the baby cuddles and am pleased I did it.

Jent13c · 31/07/2021 20:57

DS1 18m and I was ready, can't remember last feed and it was a bit of a spur of the moment thing but no regret or emotion. DH just said 'its the next stage now' and he all of a sudden wasn't my tiny baby any more.
DS2 11m expressed as he never fed. Remember my last pump fondly, such an amazing feeling to never have to pump. Very much planned to stop expedited by covid vaccine but again no guilt or emotions.

Love breastfeeding but love toddlers more, just love the next stage.

User0ne · 31/07/2021 21:00

I don't remember the last feed with either of my older ones

Ds1 was just over 2 and I couldn't hack tandem feeding any longer so cut down and eventually stopped feeding him.

Ds2 I fed till around 3yrs and weaned slowly while pregnant with DS3. It was nice having a couple of months off bf.

I didn't plan with either exactly when the last feed would be and kind of did it by feel; as in whether I felt they were ok enough with me saying no. I did plan reducing feeds generally though

SillyYak · 31/07/2021 21:03

This thread is very emotional reading for me as I stopped BF my last child two weeks ago, at 14 months. I stopped BF my first at 9 months to go on a weekend break without her and had felt with hindsight it was too soon. This time I needed to be on the other side of the country for a week so decided it was a good moment to stop, since his little independent character is emerging and it just felt right to let him go in that small way. I am missing it, esp as I know I won’t be having another. But it’s nice to have my boobs back and I’ve been enjoying buying some nice new underwear now I don’t need to wear a nursing bra.

HappyDaysToCome · 31/07/2021 21:05

Yes with DC2. He was 18 months. I was taking just DC1 with me to visit Dsis abroad and I planned for it to end then. I do remember sitting there thinking it was the last time ever.

HumphreysCorner · 31/07/2021 21:05

Yes, 22 months then we went to Spain and the day before went was the last time. X

Snowpaw · 31/07/2021 21:06

I don’t specifically remember the last feed but I remember the first morning that I woke up and thought, “right I won’t try today and see if she asks for it” and she didn’t, and that was that. It had been a slow tail off of feeding though - by that point she was around 13 months and I was only feeding her in the mornings by then. She had gradually been losing interest and feeding for very short amounts of time and I knew the end was near. I feel a bit emotional thinking back on it, but at the time I think I was glad to be done. I felt a bit touched out.

Bigtoejoe · 31/07/2021 21:07

Was going away for a night when child was 16m so decided that was the cut off. He was wriggly by then so I remember during that last feed thinking it wasn't as relaxing as it used to be! Don't really remember any rooting when I came back, though I'd cut down to just one morning feed by the time I stopped anyway.

delilabell · 31/07/2021 21:08

She was 5 days old and I was in agony. The guilt follows me to this day. I try not to think about it

dementedma · 31/07/2021 21:11

Surprised at how much people felt about stopping bf. I bf all 3 for a while then switched to bottles as I was back at work and tbh, never enjoyed it anyway so have no idea when the last feed was with any of them. Mind you I freely admit I'm not very maternal and bfing was just a way of getting milk into them like any other for me. I can't even remember their birth weights or what time they were born!

Lottle · 31/07/2021 21:17

I do remember. I took him off as he'd fallen asleep and been on so long. I didn't realise it would be our last one or I'd have let him stay on longer. He kept biting and I psychologically was getting to afraid to put him on. I'd flinch and it would make things worse.

FlorestanAndEusebius · 31/07/2021 21:27

I do remember with both older DDs: DD1's last feed was before I went to hospital as I was miscarrying and bleeding heavily. It was my first night away from her (she was 14 months) and I was in such a mess mentally and physically it just stopped there, which was sad.
With DD2 I was going away for a night when she was 16 months. Bad weather meant that I was stranded away for what became 3 nights and again, that was that (along with some serious engorgement and hand expressing in airport loos!) I remember taking a photo of what did end up being our last feed before I left, though, as a 'just in case'.
I'm still feeding dd3 at 11 months. I just don't know when/how it'll end this time, especially as she's my last baby. I hope it is a gradual end that at least one of us chooses, since both previous journeys had abrupt endings.

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