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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbour has stolen my clogs

239 replies

MongoAkimboAGoGo · 30/07/2021 08:26

I had a decorative pair of clogs outside my front door and this morning they have disappeared and a pair of old trainers put in their place. I only have 3 neighbours - I messaged the one I thought had done it saying “haha great joke, can I have my clogs back now and you can have your trainers back” and she read the message, put a laughing face on it but never replied. I went around kept it friendly, said my kids had found it very amusing but seriously, can I have them back now and she made out she didn’t know what I was talking about but was clearly trying to hold in laughter. I just want them back. I never found it funny to begin with, I was just trying to stay light hearted but I’m getting annoyed now.

OP posts:
Tulipomania · 31/07/2021 08:45

She's trying to get a rise from you.

Don't give her the satisfaction.

Ignore it and she'll put them back in the next couple of days.

HummingBeeBox · 31/07/2021 08:46

@AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken I hate this. If you don't find it funny it's not funny. Comedy is about the observer, not whether the comedian finds it hilarious. My stepdad used to prank us all the time and I hated feeling the pressure to 'lighten up' or 'roll with it.' I wasn't particularly upset, just found it tiring and boring and incredibly annoying when something I needed was moved or replaced.

Her kids also need to realise that winding someone up when they don't find it funny any more isn't on.

DrSbaitso · 31/07/2021 08:46

Oh and definitely don't prank back unless you're a particularly shit breed of student YouTuber. It'll escalate, the neighbours will think you're both nuts and she will almost certainly win because she's got much more experience.

Original poster
MongoAkimboAGoGo · 31/07/2021 08:47

The stupid thing is we did come close to being friends at one point but I found her difficult to get on with, she’d constantly cancel plans, ignore messages, initiate plans and then cancel … it just seemed hard work.
I’ve sent her a message this morning saying if you have the cloggs can I have them back now with a sad face

OP posts:
HummingBeeBox · 31/07/2021 08:49

@MongoAkimboAGoGo I think you need to be a little firmer next time. State that it isn't funny and don't be so nice. The emojis are showing her she is getting a rise out of you

DrSbaitso · 31/07/2021 08:52

@MongoAkimboAGoGo

The stupid thing is we did come close to being friends at one point but I found her difficult to get on with, she’d constantly cancel plans, ignore messages, initiate plans and then cancel … it just seemed hard work. I’ve sent her a message this morning saying if you have the cloggs can I have them back now with a sad face
Why did she fall out with CCTV guy? Why does he have CCTV?
DrSbaitso · 31/07/2021 08:53

Sounds like she pranks because it's the only form of social interaction she can handle.

Not your issue.

pictish · 31/07/2021 08:53

I agree. Text her being polite but explicit.

“Hi Twat. Please bring my clogs back. I know you have taken them as a joke but the amusement is yours alone. Taking or interfering with a neighbour’s belongings is inappropriate. I wouldn’t do it to you. Please respect my wishes, return the clogs and leave my things alone going forward. Thank you.”

How does that sound?

longwayoff · 31/07/2021 08:55

Oh, I forgot. OP, on no account buy any decorative garden gnomes or it will never end.

Comefromaway · 31/07/2021 08:56

@shouldistop

Ring the police now. She’s taken something off you.

You'd really ring the police on a neighbour playing a harmless prank?

Taking something that does not belong to you is not a harmless prank, it’s theft.
DrSbaitso · 31/07/2021 08:56

@pictish

I agree. Text her being polite but explicit.

“Hi Twat. Please bring my clogs back. I know you have taken them as a joke but the amusement is yours alone. Taking or interfering with a neighbour’s belongings is inappropriate. I wouldn’t do it to you. Please respect my wishes, return the clogs and leave my things alone going forward. Thank you.”

How does that sound?

Honestly, to someone like her I think it would sound uptight and self righteous, even though it's 100% correct. That's why I'd suggest nothing but asking flatly for the clogs back. Focuses on the issue, doesn't give her anything to weaponise. Like you're too far above her twattishness to acknowledge or talk about it, your only concern is that she's got your property and you want it back.
Tlollj · 31/07/2021 08:57

I can’t stand practical ‘jokes’ really not my sense of humour at all.
Go and knock on the door. Say give me back my fucking clogs you twat.

MagnoliaBeige · 31/07/2021 09:02

If you don’t get them back today, I’d message her “A joke is only funny if both parties are laughing and I’m certainly not laughing. Give them back now, they were a present from my parents and you’ve taken this far enough”.

Sapnupuas · 31/07/2021 09:03

I hope you get your clogs back, OP.

Going forward, you'll just have to ignore her. She's enjoying getting a reaction out of you.

DrSbaitso · 31/07/2021 09:06

Bear in mind that she obviously fancies herself as "wacky" and "mad" and "not like the boring people" so I wouldn't do anything that reinforces the idea, in her own mind, that she's a crazy diamond who needs to shine on.

AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken · 31/07/2021 09:17

[quote HummingBeeBox]@AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken I hate this. If you don't find it funny it's not funny. Comedy is about the observer, not whether the comedian finds it hilarious. My stepdad used to prank us all the time and I hated feeling the pressure to 'lighten up' or 'roll with it.' I wasn't particularly upset, just found it tiring and boring and incredibly annoying when something I needed was moved or replaced.

Her kids also need to realise that winding someone up when they don't find it funny any more isn't on. [/quote]
Moving things you need and therefore making someone late is very different to a pair of decorative clogs disappearing or the trousers of a Father Christmas decoration having his trousers pulled down.
It’s perfectly possible to go about your day without a pair of decorative clogs on your step.
This is a harmless prank, in my opinion, because it wouldn’t impact my day at all. It’s not even a mild inconvenience.

DrSbaitso · 31/07/2021 09:22

This is a harmless prank, in my opinion, because it wouldn’t impact my day at all.

Well good for you. But it impacts OP's day because it upsets her to have her possessions fucked with and removed entirely, and not returned on request. And since it is happening to OP, she's the one who gets to make the judgement on it. Not you.

pictish · 31/07/2021 09:26

Dr you are right - I was thinking that if events should escalate, OP would have evidence that the neighbour had been explicitly asked to stop.
That anyone should receive that text and continue, places the culpability squarely at their feet.

“Get fucked taking my stuff.” would also work.

TheSunShinesBrighter · 31/07/2021 09:36

This is a harmless prank, in my opinion, because it wouldn’t impact my day at all. It’s not even a mild inconvenience.

So you’d be happy for someone (a person you dislike) to remove something you had bought or were given as a gift from your front garden?

Would you really think it was ok? I very much doubt you would.

rainbowstardrops · 31/07/2021 09:36

Is she 12 years old???? The fact that your young children find it hilarious, shows how bloody immature she's being!!!
She's also pissed off your other neighbour before by tampering with his pots. She sounds insufferable! I think it's time that you fall out with her too.

PanamaPattie · 31/07/2021 09:45

She sounds insufferable.

gingerbiscuits · 31/07/2021 09:47

@CarolinaWeeper

Op can you go round and really clearly state that you understand it was a joke but you want the clogs back as they were a gift

I would do that, or if you don't feel you can say it then write it down and put it through her letterbox. You understand it was a joke. You don't find it funny. You're upset as they were a gift from your parents. You want them returned immediately. You don't want her to touch any of your property again.

At least that way you have some evidence that she's been asked to stop if she continues. She sounds pathetic and ridiculous.

I agree!⬆️

She sounds like an overgrown child with too much time on her hands! I'm all for the odd friendly joke but she's taking it too far & it's downright rude now. I'd be VERY pissed off in your position - especially as the clog pots have sentimental value.

Allthesefolks · 31/07/2021 09:49

Ugh people who play practical jokes are always bullying dicks. Hope you get them back ok OP.

Timetoreflect · 31/07/2021 10:12

She sounds inane. I used to have decorative clogs (Dutch husband) and they look lovely with trailing lobeliaSmile

AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken · 31/07/2021 10:20

@TheSunShinesBrighter

This is a harmless prank, in my opinion, because it wouldn’t impact my day at all. It’s not even a mild inconvenience.

So you’d be happy for someone (a person you dislike) to remove something you had bought or were given as a gift from your front garden?

Would you really think it was ok? I very much doubt you would.

I honestly wouldn’t give a monkeys.
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