To ask what random people you think about now and again?

[AiyaNapawithmorenaps]

Here's my list
1.) ex colleague who was sure she wanted 3 kids but hadn't had any at the time. I had two and when I spoke about any of the realities of parenthood with small DC's she would sort of resist it and say 'oh well mine won't be anything like that.' Her DH was vaguely controlling with money and the last I heard she had given up her job after maternity leave, which had made me feel a bit
2.) friend who was had dreams of returning to university but things kept getting in the way, I hope she managed to return to study again.
3.) another ex colleague who had a row with her then husband, went on holiday with her mum, met a bloke by the pool, got back home, started divorce proceedings, quit her job and moved across the country to be with him. Apparently they're still together and have a child.
4.) a parent of a friend of DD's. Took her daughter out of school when Covid broke out (weeks before the schools shut) and they never returned. I think her anxiety must have really taken a battering.

For 20+ years I've noticed someone who started working at a local supermarket since she left school - she's so cheerful, attentive and helpful and gets on with her job without looking like a misery or moaning about anything - I really think she's undervalued - I think she comes across as a bit simple but I really appreciate her - she's not married and doesn't want kids - for years I've thought of sending an anonymous Valentine or maybe a Christmas card to say how much I appreciate her sunny personality - I've no interest in chatting her up or anything - I just think she makes a nice difference in her own way - I'm sure or I hope I'm not the only one who thinks well of her.

You could write to the store she works for, she might get a voucher or something.

Mine is a bit sad 🥲

When I was 17 (3 decades ago 🙈) my friend died of cancer. I often wonder what kind. Of man he would have become. Would we have kept in touch.

I sometimes think about a colleague who asked me out at my first job. He was late 20’s and I was only 17. I had zero interest in him and turned him down. Years later I found out he’d been having a ‘relationship’ with a 14 year old girl at the time of asking me out. Thank fuck I didn’t fancy him, I could have completely obliviously dated a paedophile.🤮🤮🤮

I think of my two male friends who died in their 20s, one of leukaemia and one in a car accident. I just wonder what sort of men they would've become really.

I also think of exes from time to time, but that's normal I think.

I remember a case years ago that haunts me - a couple took their children on holiday to the Norfolk coast I think and were just setting up on the beach. The children went into the water and were both swept away and killed. I think of them and wonder how you can cope - it feels just too tragic

I sometimes wonder about peaches geldofs kids. They were similar ages to my eldest two when she died and I remember being so shocked and heartbroken for them.

A young chap who used to work on our local heritage railway he was so happy and smiled all the while I saw him the one day said hello he looked like he was going to stop and chat but I was rushing so I moved on he dropped down dead a week later I occasionally think was he going to stop? What did he want to say? Why was I in such a rush?

A young woman who was in a refuge with me. She had had a baby without her family knowing and he was in and out of hospital. She'd told her (very religious) family she was away on a course and I've often wondered how it all turned out. She was lovely.

A lady I met on the freedom course she was pregnant and on the run from her ex she stopped turning up we all thought she had the baby but when asked the course leader made the comment "we can't force people to listen" her friend explained in our coffee break she returned to her ex and had her child removed immediately because of it this literally happened within a few weeks

F

I often think about my colleagues in a company that I worked for throughout the 1980’s. It was a new company, and very successful in a short time, attracting many just-graduated people, so most of us were around the same age. I left a couple of years before the Company was disgraced and went under - I often wonder what happened to all those former “ bright young things”, as despite living close to the location of the company, I’ve never come across any of my former colleagues since...

Some of the children and families I used to work with in my past career. I wonder how they all turned out and feel sad sometimes that I left them all behind when I left that job. It was just a job but it was a stage of my life and you get involved with people and care about them, then you leave and never see them again. I think about past colleagues as well, not always fondly.

@larkstar I got an anonymous Valentine's card at my workplace a few years ago, and it really worried me! A nice Christmas card thanking her for her lovely attitude would be much better imo.

A woman I sat next to on a flight from Kuala Lumpur to London about 10 years ago. We didn't chat much but she told me that she was Vietnamese, had never been to the UK before and was travelling here to live with her fiancé.
I hope she's happy, wherever she is now.

I think about my first husband a lot, and it makes me cry. We were about 18, I was a narcissistic (sp?) kid with issues from early life dv, and I treated him like shit and left him. I wish I could at least apologise to him, and I hope with all my heart that his life has been happy and that he found the good person that he deserved.

Just realised how long ago this was, about 43 years ago I was friends with a woman who I worked with in a local supermarket. She was married to a Soldier and left to have a baby.
I was pregnant at the time as well, bu she had her daughter about 3 months before I had DS.
I saw her outside the local hospital, stopped to talk, she had just had her DD weighed, said good bye and went into the hospital. Freind walked about 10 minutes into town and into a coffee shop.
When she went to take her baby from the pram, the baby had died from SIDS, it was too late and nothing coukd be done.

I never saw her again, the Army posted them straight away. I often wonder how she did.

All the old men I used to serve as a (student)barmaid in the early 2000s. Some were lovely, some were real characters and some were both. Some will be dead now inevitably. I was actually friendly enough with some of them to allow them to drag me out for too many drinks after the day shift. If I could earn enough money in that (sadly now closed) pub, I would have worked there for the rest have my life!

I think about my best friend from primary school who died of leukaemia when we were 17. (We were also at the same secondary school but had grown apart by then.) She was one of those golden people: top of the class, tipped for Oxbridge, beautiful, talented, charismatic, long blonde hair. I often think of all the people that could have died young it seems so strange and awful it was her. She was an only child too. Her poor parents. Our friendship was a bit bumpy as she always had a host of "admirers" wanting to be her best friend and I'd get jealous and frustrated. I'm now 47 and still feel guilty about that, given what happened to her.

Also I think about people I've worked with (city law firms, very competitive and stressful environment) who "lost their way" and were managed out of their jobs. When people leave in the usual way you see them in linked in or they crop up as opponents in cases. But with the "lost way" people I never seemed to hear anything of them again. It's such a cruel industry. We get told all this flannel about the firm supporting mental health yada yada. But in reality if you show a sign of weakness you're on borrowed time.

Doris , I thought of that family yesterday, young children running in to the sea and drowning. We were swimming in the sea and without noticing were way down the beach and suddenly couldn’t put my feet down . In moments . Another tragic one is my friend was training to be a massage therapist, we went to the college for her to practice on me , but there had been a mix up and it was locked . She decided to go to see her sister and nieces who had both had babies as one was over having lunch that day . While they were eating , Neice went to change baby , laid him down on the mat and he died . It was a massive infection that they had no idea about . This was about 20 years ago . When I have my grandchildren I look at them and can’t begin to imagine. On a much lighter note … did a fair bit of OLD about 10 years ago , if I pass a place I went on a lovely date , I do smile and hope their lives have been happy .

An ex boyfriend (probably the only one I would properly call an ex because there was only one on and off guy before I met my husband) that I met at 18, was with through uni, long distance after uni for a couple of years before he clearly met someone else and cut me off.

Looking back, he was emotionally abusive and financially abusive. He somehow managed to convince me to lend him money all the time despite the fact I had nothing at uni and then spent two years hard saving to get out of my overdraft. We were long distance which really meant I went down to see him when he called on me and paying for b and bs to do so. He then got a house share and managed to talk me into staying there one half term even though he left the house at 7am and didn’t get back till 7:30pm so I barely saw him and had to busy my days on my own despite being skint. I really got nothing out of the relationship but I’d been talked into it by him saying he loved me and how I wouldn’t get better than him and everything else. If I wore a top that was too fitted or I had a teeny amount of chest on show he’d make it out like other people couldn’t look at me. I struggle to make decisions because he would always demand I did then berate me for whatever choice I made and how we should have done the other option.

I still resent him massively despite it being about 14 years since I last saw him. He’s married and just had another baby - I saw pictures on mutual friends Facebook page of their wedding and know there’s been another baby. I’m married to an amazing man and have an amazing son and have a good career. I suppose there’s a simmering part of me that just wants to see him and say “look I became everything you said I never would be you shit head. Oh and does your wife know there was an overlap between me and her?” Obviously I wouldn’t say that but he gave me a need to always feel like I have to prove myself and show him he was wrong.

I don’t think about him all the time by any stretch but every now and then it flares up and I just feel he stole time and energy for too long.

That felt good.

@MinnieJackson I think about Peaches' children too, they were too young to understand and it was so tragic that the cycle was repeating. Did I hear that her ex started dating Daisy Lowe?

I worked at a petting zoo as a teen, working with a bloke who was lovely to me but ostracised from the rest of the staff. He was divorced with children my age and he treated me like one of his daughters, one of whom I met a few times.

When I went to university I kept in touch with him intermittently, and went to the farm a few times and bumped into him there. But then didn't speak to him for a couple of years. I bumped into a colleage of his who told me he'd kilked himself the previous year. I was so upset as he was one of the few people who understood me.

Not only do I think of him I often wonder how his younger daughter is doing. I found her sister on FB a few years back and really wanted to message her to pass a message on but was scared it wouldn't be welcome. I do hope she's doing ok.

I think a lot about a boy (I guess a man) I dated when I was 18/19, he had a very troubled background and I think i offered him a bit of stability but couldn’t ever really get through to him. Lost contact (way before social media) and never heard of him again, I think I have a random mutual contact, a sister of an old colleague or something but I wouldn’t dream of trying to find out about him. I just hope he’s been ok - I doubt it though.

Also a boy I dated when I lived abroad in my 20s, he barely spoke any English and he just disappeared half way through the summer. I heard he had been sent away by his dad and I briefly saw him once again but no idea what really happened to him. He was absolutely gorgeous! I still have photos I look at occasionally and think BLOODY HELL YOU WERE A BEAUT.
Hope he has had a happy life!

And a young girl from my childhood, we were friends and I think my mum was friendly with hers, she was run over and killed on the main road in my village when were about 8 or 9. I think about her a lot and her parents. Very sad.

My best friend when I was little. Her family moved abroad when we were 7 or 8, and I still think of her now and then, remembering our games and her house, and wondering how she's doing.

A young man on an apprenticeship at work, with mental health problems and a horrendous family background. He dropped out just before the end of his apprenticeship, which would have given him the means to escape it all into a well-paid trade. I hope he's OK.