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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To expect more of a holiday club...

14 replies

stilltiredinthemorning · 29/07/2021 19:35

My 5 year old daughter has delayed language skills and struggles a bit socially, so I thought it might be a good idea for her to go to a holiday club one day a week to give her an opportunity to mix with her peers over the long break. The holiday club is right next to her school and the same people run the breakfast and after school club, so a few of her friends from school also go.

It was her first day today and she was a little anxious. I was also a bit worried about her going to the toilet as she doesn't like asking (very shy) and at school the toilets are part of the classroom and they can just go straight in. Anyway, I went to drop her off and when we arrived the woman who answered the door didn't introduce herself, didn't really say hello and didn't even ask my daughter's name! She obviously just expected me to push her through the door and leave. I said it was her first day and she was a bit nervous and she just looked at me like I was mad... Fortunately another member of staff happened to walk past and asked my daughter if she wanted to go in with her (still no introductions or asking of names etc.) I hung around to have a quick chat with the first woman and tried to quickly just explain she might be shy about asking to go to the toilet and that her sun hat and lunch were in her bag. She just continued to look at me like she had no idea what I was going on about so I just kind of backed out of the door in embarrassment.

When I went back to pick her up, the same woman was there. I asked her if my daughter had had a good day, she just said 'yeah fine', literally NOTHING more than that. No information about what she'd done or how she'd been, not even 'yes she's had great fun', literally nothing.

AIBU to expect a bit more? I don't want a handover meeting or detailed description of her day, but given that she's 5, it was her first time in a new building with people neither she or I have ever met before just a bit of warmth and enthusiasm would have been nice??

OP posts:
parietal · 29/07/2021 19:38

Sounds like that person was a bit rubbish

Some holiday clubs are just warehouses for kids. Mine went to one that offered outdoor runt around (no structure) or colouring or watching a movie. Same every day.

The expensive ones have well structured educational activities. It just depends.

Chikapu · 29/07/2021 19:43

Yes, having run and worked at loads of holiday clubs that was extremely rubbish. I'd never expect a child to be handed over without any introductions and a chat. Ideally, you'd have been invited in for a look round and your daughter should have been shown where the toilets etc are.
I wouldn't feel all that comfortable taking her back if the staff can't spare a few minutes to talk to you about how her day was.

girlmom21 · 29/07/2021 19:50

Be more firm. If you're not happy with a service you're paying for and, more importantly, the people looking after your children, you have to say something.

DisorganisedOrganiser · 29/07/2021 19:58

I’m surprised at these comments. Totally normal for any holiday club I have ever sent my DC to. They are very much childcare warehouses round here, not enrichment. I’ve never had a problem with the care though. Definitely no long hand overs (other parents in a rush waiting to drop off or pick up). Maybe different in different areas. Activity clubs etc tend to be more friendly but even there I have never had a long handover. Absolutely no inviting anyone in with Covid.

AnyOldLion · 29/07/2021 20:15

They are very much childcare warehouses round here, not enrichment.

Same around here, they're supervised childcare for the holidays but that's about it. I don't think they have the staff capacity to individually get to know each child. They just heard them in and make sure they don't strangle each other.

cansu · 29/07/2021 20:16

The person was poor at communication. They should have been better than this. I dropped my dd with SN at a new club this week. They greeted her by name and chatted briefly with me, checking she had her lunch and some spare clothes. When I picked up, they told me what she had enjoyed. It literally took a few mins. They were rubbish, but it was just one individual. If your dd is happy to go back then that's your answer as to the care.

HalfShrunkMoreToGo · 29/07/2021 20:19

That does seem poor, holiday clubs can be amazing, DD (7yo) is at the Outdoor Pursuits Centre one this summer and it's brilliant, the staff are all really friendly and engaging, they do structured activities every day; archery, abseiling, climbing, kayaking, fencing, bush crafts, den building......

It will be a little late to arrange anything different I think this year but please don't be put off of the idea of holiday club they really can be brilliant.

Africa2go · 29/07/2021 20:25

Yes more communication would be preferred but as pps have said, you probably need to lower your expectations. It's not like nursery, it will be catering for all ages of children (presumably up to 11) - usually the same kids, used to that hands-off childcare from doing breakfast club / after school / holiday club. They'll also be used to parents throwing their kids in and racing off to work / rushing to collect without wanting much feedback (because working parents don't have much choice but to use those types of holiday clubs even if their children don't enjoy it).

TokyoSushi · 29/07/2021 20:26

I think they can vary hugely, some offer a full programme, others are literally just a safe place to leave your kids for a few hours, it sounds like yours might have been the latter.

Africa2go · 29/07/2021 20:27

@Halfshrunk that sounds like a different type of facility - sounds fab but not the "school" type the OP is talking about.

stilltiredinthemorning · 29/07/2021 21:34

Yeah, this, was definitely of the 'warehouse' variety. I do actually work but am lucky enough to have family support so didn't need to book the holiday club for childcare. I was on my way to work this morning and definitely didn't want a long chat, just a quick few words as it was her first day. The staff didn't exactly seem run off their feet and the woman I 'collected her' from stood there in silence while I gathered up her various bit and bobs etc and certainly could have said SOMETHING even just 'she's done really well on her first day' or 'see you next week sweetie'.

I'm not sure it's worth complaining... Other than the fact they didn't ask her name/write anything down (which seems a bit lax from a fire safety perspective if nothing else) I would only really be saying your staff seem a bit miserable and disinterested in kids...

I feel sad for my daughter as she was really looking forward to it. She was quite subdued when she came out and I couldn't really get much out of her. For context it costs the same per day as my son's nursery (where presumably they need a higher staff ratio) and I know they need to build relationships as it's a much longer term thing but the difference is enormous. I'm really just talking about looking vaguely pleased to see the kids as they arrive and at least pretending to listen to parents perfectly reasonable requests/concerns...

I feel like not sending her back, but we've paid in advance and it's such a long break away from any large group interactions after such a disrupted Reception year I'm not sure....

OP posts:
Pipersouth · 02/08/2021 18:05

My 6 year old went to his first day of structured (and expensive) holiday club today but was also the day I withdrew him from the rest of the paid-for week. Frankly the level of monitoring was dangerous around young kids and swimming when the safe-guarding turns out to be just a tick in a box.

Steelesauce · 02/08/2021 18:33

Mine go to a sports holiday club once a week. Its very much a drop them off and tell them their names and off they went sort of thing. Pick up was 'I'm here for x and y' and that was it. Its not a nursery, there's no need for anything else.

Tiddleztheelephant · 02/08/2021 18:41

@Steelesauce

Mine go to a sports holiday club once a week. Its very much a drop them off and tell them their names and off they went sort of thing. Pick up was 'I'm here for x and y' and that was it. Its not a nursery, there's no need for anything else.
I mean I do get where people are coming from with this type of reply, but OP's child is five, she's shy and it was her first day.... a little bit of empathy wouldn't go amiss.

My ds went to the first day of his summer club today. She said hello and took him over to introduce him to some boys she thought he'd like (he didn't know anybody) then at the end of the day handover was busy and quick but she sent me a text later just to say he did really well, fitted in and made friends.
It doesn't take a huge amount of effort to a small, shy child.

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