My DF has dementia. It has placed a massive burden on my DM emotionally so I speak to her most days. There is no financial burden - mum and dad are extremely wealthy and actually helped my DB and I out in such a way that we owed properties outright before we met our relative partners and there are various other financial benefits that have accrued. It is likely (through very recent discussions with DM) that this will include, before long, interest in a very expensive holiday portfolio. Her relationship with DH has nothing been smooth but it’s now at an even keel.
My MIL is on her own. My FIL dying was a big shock and he was a lovely guy. She whinges but she is comfortable. However, she is extremely tight. She will walk off when bills are due, expect you to shop on her behalf so she isn’t out of pocket if you visit her and most recently got most upset when the overnight care for our baby we sod for was not just up for grabs to be used by SIL. SIL just as bad as she is very happy to be hosted/never return etc
So, it will be not long before said holiday portfolio is put in my name as well as DB (different properties each) which will attract maintenance fees (tho in relative terms not much). However, it does mean that anyone staying there can make use of the facilities associated (think hunting, shooting, fishing, very expensive restaurants and bars) which do attract fees. Once DP’s are no longer using it the pressure will be on for me to invite the in laws. They would never expect to pay for said bill but will expect to be hosted.
How do I head it off at the pass?