to be annoyed that my nephew will not be at dds 1st birthday 'party'?

[dee24]

My dd is 1 on Thursday. Having a little 'party' for her and have invited my friends and family over to see her etc. Party will consist of sandwiches, birthday cake and kids playing with the ball pit, rocker and pop up house so nothing fancy.
My brother says that my nephew (18 months) won't be there as he has another party on the same day EVEN though I told him about it months ago and he said that was no problem. His mum said a week ago that she is taking him to her friends childs birthday instead.
Am I being unreasonable? I know that she's only 1 but I am really disappointed that her big cousin won't be there. We are a close family and I would have thought family first

Oh and should have said, we are a close family but SIL doesn't like this very much She's not very close to nephew either, he cries and says he doesn't want to go home when she picks him up from my mums I would be gutted if my dd did that!!

Sorry to dissapoint you then dee but it will happen. my dc's do this when we leave my friends house and when we leave my parents.
It is not the sign of a child not close to their parent just a child that is enjoying the person they are with at the time and don't want it to end.

I think it may be something to do with being stuck in a corner when he's at home and being completely ignored by his mother, I'm sure other children may cry when leaving somewhere but not really the same situation. My nephew can be away from his mum all weekend, in fact he was away for a whole week once when they were on holiday, and not even bother with her/give her a hug when she comes to get him. That's different from leaving somewhere together, when you have also been there. I'm pretty sure that will happen when dd is older

but your friends are really important when you have young children .. and if the nephew is only 18 months old they are new friendships, not cemented ones .. I am hardly surprised that in the scheme of things they have chosen a local friend's party over a relatives

relatives will always be part of your lives, non-relatives need more attention

I think you are making a little too much out of this .. 1st birthday parties are for the adults not the children who don't know nor care

"Oh and should have said, we are a close family but SIL doesn't like this very much She's not very close to nephew either, he cries and says he doesn't want to go home when she picks him up from my mums I would be gutted if my dd did that!!"

sorry but that is one of the bitchiest, most insensitive comments I have read in a very long time .. I'd think again if I were you ... ever heard of karma?

I am really not surprised she is chosing a friend over a relative who thinks of her like that? .. yes you strike me as a really 'close family'

I completely understand where you are coming from but you will look bck in a few months and wonder why you were bothered.

I have 1 nephew (10) and 2 nieces (6 and 4) and I have never missed seeing them on their birthdays (and that is a lot of birthdays!) - but my sister, her DH and my nephew had booked to go to an airshow for the weekend of my DS's 1st birthday (my parents were looking after my 2 nieces so they could all still come to see him) so couldn't come to his party. Me and DH were annoyed at the time but we joked about it with them and now, 4 months later, nobody cares and DS certainly didn't bother .

They were at the same airshow the year before when DS was born so they didn't come to see him for 4 days - I think my sister was more upset about being away than we were about them not seeing him. People have their own lives to get on with don't they?

Don't worry Dee, it's one less toddler to worry about