To not want to move up north?

[hurrayfortherain]

Don't get me wrong, i was a northerner myself for 18 years and I have nothing against it.

It's just london is my home now but dh says we will never be able to afford a house here and he doesn't want to do shared ownership flats (which I don't mind) when we can afford a nice house in Manchester.

We have two children and he says maybe it's time we leave, as we are currently renting and there is no security as landlord could want the house back any time to increase rents/sell etc and we would have to find another rental as he is completely against shared ownership and doesn't want to live in a flat which again I don't mind! (We currently rent a two bed house with garden) which again will outgrow as children get bigger.

My husband wants the security that buying a house would bring but I don't particularly get on with my family that live there, we have his brother who lives there with my children's only cousins but my in-laws/friends live nearby us in London and I don't want to leave this life I've created! But I understand that a stable home is very important.

What would you do?

I would buy a house somewhere we can afford. It doesn’t have to be Manchester if you don’t want to be near your family - there are plenty of other cheaper places than London.

What is your budget for buying a house?

Maybe you could find a location in-between London and the North?

It would depend for me on how much practical support you get from the family that is nearby - it is hard managing with no family help.

But I definitely see the point in moving to an area where you can afford to buy.

Please don't come .

Is there anywhere else you could afford to buy that's not Manchester?

Wales, SW, E. Anglia etc?

There's some very nice places near to Manchester. Perhaps consider that - so you can have the stability of owning and also be close to your home area and your dh's family, without having to be right on top of your own family.

You've got an advantage over priced out Londoners, in that you have family and roots in the north (and therefore won't be resented as an 'incomer' by 'local' locals).

Either that, or think again about shared ownership. It's a good option for some.

@accentdusoleil

Please don't come .

Why shouldn't she come home, if she wants to?

@accentdusoleil

Please don't come .

This sort of defensiveness is so crap

How were you a Northerner for 18 years?? Surely if you were born a Northerner you don't cease to be one when you move?

There are plenty of reasonable places that aren't Manchester. What about Bristol or Norwich or Durham?

The outskirts of expensive areas such as London and Manchester tend to offer some brilliant properties for a fraction of the price and they're very often in much nicer, far more decent areas.

My daughter and her boyfriend just got a gorgeous little two bedroomed flat in Warrington right on the outskirts where it's deemed a slightly rougher area. Rent is £450 per month and it's smack in the middle and within easy reach of both work and uni so they'll live with having to endure the thre or four mins walk through a dodgy rough looking area. Same sized flat in Manchester more than twice that amount and nowhere near as nice.

We live in an area that has the most daft stupidly ridiculous prices for a two bedroomed box new build. I could buy a house just 20 miles or so down the road and for the same price get a detached house with land / stables and yard in a quiet rural area at the arse end out the way.

We had planned to up-sticks and buy one of those after the kids left school and whatnot but we're now planning to head on and over to Norway initially for a short-term temporary basis but hopefully with the aim being to make it a permanent move. Property in Norway is daft cheap in comparison and I prefer cold weather and don't care for people so it's suits us perfectly.

Different when your kids are little and you have to compromise but areas just outside the most popular areas and sought after locations are definitely worth looking at.

But she doesn't want to, or have I spectacularly missed the point of this thread?

If you don’t want to then why do you have to?

If most of your friends and family are in London, and you like living there, then I'd start by looking at ways that you can find a more stable living situation that will give you enough space as your children get older without having to move away.

@accentdusoleil

Please don't come .

Eh?

Could you buy to let somewhere else and continue to rent on london?

The issue for you isn't moving up north, it's moving away from where you are, now. You need to get that clear with him.

We have a My Cookie Dough stand in Manchester Arndale.

I feel like that's enough to make anybody want to live here.

@CassandraTrotter

Could you buy to let somewhere else and continue to rent on london?

I think that's an excellent idea. However I suggested that once before to a poster and it seemed as though the whole world of MN piled on me, telling me that buy-to-lets put prices up/made things more difficult for locals to buy, greedy landlords....you name it.

That is not necessarily true, where I live there are some buy to let places but plenty of others that are not.

In the op's position, I would be tempted to buy a nice, easy to maintain flat in a place miles away and let it through a reputable lettings agency. It will go up in value, the rent will cover the mortgage, maintenance and charges, the remainder can be saved for when the op is able to buy somewhere she likes in the London area.

Op, there are areas just outside of London which are cheaper but maybe you have already looked at that.

Don't move somewhere if you don't want to.

I'm with you. DH thinks he is sick of London and wants to move back north. I like London. I like the energy, I like the size of the place, I like the food and I like weather in the south. I remember why we left the north and I don't think I've changed enough to want to go back yet.

What don't you like about Manchester? There plenty of areas that have tons going on at half the price. Easy to make new networks

@accentdusoleil

Please don't come .

Oh, that will upset many on here, the hair-shirt brigade! Can I also say Don't come to East Anglia either.

@TokenGinger

We have a My Cookie Dough stand in Manchester Arndale.

I feel like that's enough to make anybody want to live here.

My daughter's new flat has a Tim Horton's Canadian shop just a minute two down the road, China Town and Asian food markets opposite that, a Lidl, Aldi, B&M Bargains – she thinks all her Christmas mornings have landed at once.

"Mum check this shit out you will love it. Asian market - 10p for fresh oranges. TEN PENCE!!! Also this. Look at this. Cheap stores, pound shops and a fucking Horton's within spitting distance I'm living the dream bitch!!"

Shared ownership owner here. What does husband have against it? It was the only way I could buy somewhere in London and in an area that I love. Despite only owning a share, it feels 100% mine, and it gives me that feeling of stability that you mention. Would he reconsider this as an option?

@OooPourUsACupLove

I'm with you. DH thinks he is sick of London and wants to move back north. I like London. I like the energy, I like the size of the place, I like the food and I like weather in the south. I remember why we left the north and I don't think I've changed enough to want to go back yet.

That's exactly how I feel! I also think he would regret it as he grew up in London!