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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

DDs friend made a fake account

17 replies

eppuku · 24/07/2021 14:53

DD is 14, almost 15. She's friends with a boy, let's call him Tom.

She got a message about a month ago, on Instagram from a ‘girl’ and the message said ‘hello, I'm friends with tom’, DD asked Tom if he's friends with a girl called x and he said yes. She then spoke to the girl and everything was fine. But last night, she was messaging them ‘both’ and then the ‘girl’ called her and she saw Tom and then the call ended. The ‘girl’ then said it was an accident. DD asked tom what he was doing and he said nothing she then asked him why he was on the girls account, he said he wasn't and then told her they were together. dd didn't really believe him.

They carried on messaging and then Tom sent a message which was meant to be from the ‘girls’ account so DD confronted him and he then admitted that he made the account, DD asked him why and he told her he didn't know, DD told him it was weird and he told her to it was a joke and she doesn't have to take it so seriously.

DD has told me as she feels uncomfortable, what should I advise her to do?

OP posts:

Pingued · 24/07/2021 14:56

Stop talking to people she hasn't met in real life?

FudgeFlake · 24/07/2021 14:56

Find some new friends!

OuiOuiKitty · 24/07/2021 14:56

I would advise her not to message to strangers online and give Tom a wide berth.

chorizoTapas · 24/07/2021 14:56

It's a good lesson that you never know who is really on the other end of the phone, that she shouldn't talk to strangers/people she hasn't met and mainly that Tom is a liar and it's time to move on from that friendship

User112 · 24/07/2021 14:56

Id ask her to away from Tom. I want my friends to be 100% trust worthy .

Original poster

eppuku · 24/07/2021 15:04

@OuiOuiKitty

I would advise her not to message to strangers online and give Tom a wide berth.

DD doesn't normally message strangers but she thought the ‘girl’ was toms friend so wasn't suspicious.

I will be telling her to stay away from tom as It is a very strange thing to do!

OP posts:

Bythemillpond · 24/07/2021 15:07

He sounds quite weird.

What did he hope to get out of it?

Original poster

eppuku · 24/07/2021 15:22

No idea what he wanted to get out of it as DD asked him why he made the account and he told her he didn't know

OP posts:

TotorosCatBus · 24/07/2021 15:27

Clearly Tom is not the friend that she thought he was.

She is right to be suspicious about his motives. Is your dd lesbian/bi? Has she dated Tom? Maybe he fancies her and wants to use the girl account to trick or get info out of her? Whatever the motive is I'd be telling her that I would be giving him a wide berth and meeting any future online friends on video/Snapchat quickly.

ItPearl · 24/07/2021 15:27

That sounds like a horrible experience for your dd. She probably shared things with this "girl" that she wouldnt have shared with Tom.
Yr DD must feel very betrayed and confused.

Not everybody is this crazy but my God there are some oddballs out there

RealBecca · 24/07/2021 15:31

"I don't know" is code for "im not gping to tell you the truth. Adult males alsp use this All. The. Time.

Id tell her to sack off a friendship woth someone who tricks her and lies to her and not to talk to strangers online. She was naive to think it was ok because it was apparently a friend of a a friend, thats still a stranger online.

SpacePotato · 24/07/2021 15:34

Tom is a creepy fucker and your DD shouldn't trust him anymore.

It wasn't a joke.

MrsEko · 24/07/2021 15:39

'It was a joke'. What a wanker.

Now he's going to pile on the 'oh, you are no fun' and 'I can't believe you are taking this so seriously' bollocks.

ItPearl · 24/07/2021 15:41

And your dd should not feel she owes him the benefit of the doubt or a second chance. She can just decide "nope, this batshit behavior is NOT FOR ME"

TooWicked · 24/07/2021 15:44

what should I advise her to do?

You should advise her to stop talking to strangers on the Internet for starters.

Then see if you can find some kind of Internet safety course or tutorial for her to attend/watch, and tell her to give Tom a wide berth too.

TotorosCatBus · 24/07/2021 17:14

"I don't know" is code for "im not gping to tell you the truth. Adult males alsp use this All. The. Time.

^^ absolutely this

He knows really but doesn't want her to know because he knows it's bad

AmyDudley · 24/07/2021 17:25

My guess would be he wanted to use this fictional girl to ask your DD what she thought of Tom, because he fancies her.
It's a creepy way to go about things if that is the case, and if it is for some other reason that is also weird. I'd suggest she keeps her distance with Tom.

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