DS is in a ‘long distance relationship’

[verleest]

My son turned 13 last week, for the past month he's been spending more time in his room and being moody when we ask him to go somewhere with us. We thought it was as he was about to be a teenager.

Today, I checked his phone as I usually do but he keeps changing his password, today I told him he wouldn't have his phone if he didn't tell me his password, so he did eventually.

Whilst I was looking at his search history, he got a message from a girl on Instagram who I hadn't heard of, so I checked her profile and she's 14/15, and she has him in her ‘bio’ and apparently they've been dating for a month. She doesn't live anywhere near us (about 3 hours away). I checked their messages and she broke up with a girl to be with DS a few months ago and then she went back to the girl and now she's back with DS again and she seems a bit clingy. She constantly tells DS she misses him if he hasn't texted her for a few hours. She also tells him she loves him constantly but that could just be teenagers!

What do I do about this?

I found out that this girl is real as they've called before. ds still wont say how they met and I still feel uncomfortable as she still wants to message him ALL the time.

If he won't be honest with you and discuss it rationally then he doesn't get his phone. It would be that simple for me.

Can you set some rules around him communicating with her - then he can blame you rather than her blaming him iyswim.
I think him only having his phone at certain times will be the easiest way to do this.
Keep him busy and active and seeing other friends in real life. He is still young enough that you can (and need to, IMO) be fairly strict about what he can and can't do. Or he'll soon be 16 and doing god knows what.