Anyone else feel they can't be bothered to eat?

[fellrunner85]

Does anyone else feel that eating is a chore?

I never used to feel this way - pre kids, food was something I'd look forward to and enjoy. But nowadays I have so little time with work, kids, exercise, housework and everything else, that I genuinely forget to eat during the day and will just grab whatever is to hand if I become so hungry I can't ignore it any more.

Food has definitely become just fuel. If I could take a pill to stop being hungry, I would happily do so; so that I could just have one decent healthy meal a day with the rest of the family, and not eat outside of that.

Am I strange? Does anyone else feel like this? And if so, how do you force yourself to eat breakfast and lunch, and get healthy food down yourself?

I'm increasingly running on just coffee and fruit, and well aware it isn't good for me - but finding the motivation to eat is difficult.

It seems like you're ignoring your own needs because you are going 100 miles an hour and putting everyone else's needs first.

Sometimes life is like that, but if it's all the time, that's not mentally or physically healthy. You need to prioritise you; do you get any time to switch off and be 'you' like you were pre kids?

Not really, @ScrimShawSeaShore - there's very little down time, if any. I find it very difficult to carve out time for myself.

It sounds like you have an eating disorder

This isn’t normal. You don’t have a healthy relationship with food. Coffee and fruit all day?

I always have a proper dinner with the kids, @drpet49. But throughout the day when I'm running around I can often find I've gone til 5pm or 6pm without having much aside from coffee and fruit, or maybe a cereal bar/bit of cheese/whatever is in the fridge.

I'm not consciously restricting what I eat. I just only eat when I'm hungry, and often genuinely forget otherwise.

I don't think it sounds like an eating disorder like PP says. I've witnessed that and it's not about not being bothered to eat!

My MIL. Is like you, just not bothered. You do need to make an effort so you don't end up getting poorly.

I'm the same, I own a cafe and spend all day cooking for other people then forget to eat myself! I get thru the day on mainly coffee, I try to have a proper tea but even that doesn't happen on the days the dc are at their dad's. I know it's not healthy, and I say every week I'm going to eat better but I'm so busy it doesn't happen.

I suppose organisation is the key, can you make overnight oats to grab while the kids are having breakfast? If you're doing packed lunches make yourself one at the same time?

Fwiw, it doesn't feel like an eating disorder to me either. It's more the opposite of one - in that I'm not obsessed with eating or not eating, it just doesn't cross my mind most of the time.
And when it does, I eat. I don't restrict myself.
I want to find ways of having easy healthy food to hand, which is why I asked if anyone else experiences anything similar.

Thanks @lanbro. I don't need to make packed lunches as the kids have school dinners, but overnight oats is a good idea.

I also need ideas for quick easy food that I can just grab (hence why I often resort to cereal bars or fruit). I don't want to eat rubbish, but I don't have the time or inclination to make myself a proper lunch either.

There's a hormone called ghrelin which makes you feel hungry. It evolved so that we wouldn't turn down food when it was available ('no thanks, I don't feel like mammoth today' 6 days in a row, followed by having no strength at all to hunt when the tribe next needed to) Ghrelin gets released when we smell food cooking, and, crucially, at the time of day when we normally eat. That's why people who restrict their eating hours only suffer for about a week; ghrelin release is very quick to respond.

So, food that smells good and building regular habits will help you. After a week of always eating at 8am, 1pm and 6pm, you'll miraculously find that your body starts to trigger you to eat on its own.

The less you eat the less hungry you feel.
That's why intermittent fasting works so well for weight loss. I know as I lost 3.5st doing it. You've accidentally conditioned your body into doing OMAD (one meal a day) just eat more, proper meals at set times until you get used to it and your hunger signals will catch up.

Having cold meats, hard boiled eggs and pre sliced crudites in the fridge is good grabby food. If you want to feel hungrier, carbs will help though. Massive bowl of pasta salad in the fridge?

This is not normal. And not prioritising yourself/not making time for yourself, isn't either. Neither of which you seem to be bothered about.

I am! I have always, and I mean always prioritised myself, my health, my well-being, making time for myself, even wgrn ds's were small. I think this is where lots of women go wrong.

Maybe because I've had a medical condition since aged 1, I've always viewed it this way? But I know other Women also do it, unfortunately on MN many women don't.

I don’t usually but this heat certainly makes hot food less appealing.

Have you had covid recently? I had it in December and my appetite hasn’t returned.

After HG pregnancy my appetite also disappeared for a few years (I guess I associated food with nausea and vomiting).

I can happily go without food until I feel dizzy or snappy/shaky and realise I’ve forgotten to eat.

Eating is a chore even when I’m not busy. I really dislike food. Left to my own devices I’d never cook but having a family and observant OH (who dislikes it when I get too thin) I do eat and cook regularly.

I’m the same. I don’t ‘enjoy’ food, eat one cooked meal a day simply because I’m expected to.
I would live on snack food if I was on my own. Things such as fruit, toast cereal bars. Often it’s because I can’t think of what I actually want to eat but I know I’m hungry so need to eat.
A tablet supplying all the nutrition and vitamins my body needs sounds ideal.

Yes when I'm stressed, depressed and/or not prioritising my own needs. Usually a bit of all three!

I always feel better when I start eating make regularly

No, I haven't had Covid recently, but my appetite has definitely decreased. I think a lot of it is to do with my running training. When I'm in full marathon training I get hungry, but when I'm not (like at the moment) it's like my body is used to expending far more calories than this, so feels it doesn't need to take as much on.

I'm glad I'm not alone though. And maybe it's not altogether a bad thing that I only eat when I'm hungry?

@fellrunner85

Not really, *@ScrimShawSeaShore* - there's very little down time, if any. I find it very difficult to carve out time for myself.

Have you got any support - partner/family/friends - to help you?

It does sound like you are putting your basic needs last and I think looking into why that is would be useful. In our society many women put their needs last because we are primary caregivers (either with kids or with elderly parents). But it's important to recognise that you can't keep going on like this because simply put your mind & body can only deal with this short term before your own mental/physical health problems set in and then you won't be able to help anyone.

It may be you are a people pleaser and feel you can't say no, so run yourself ragged that way. But your needs are NOT less important than others.

It might be you're a perfectionist, trying to keep it all going, staying in control, but nothing and no one is perfect.

Counselling may help you explore the reasons behind the choices you make.

No I don't. Unfortunately.

TheFoundations made lots of great points.
I work in fitness and could never eat breakfast. Like you I forget to eat if busy so really have to make sure I do.

Food for me is just fuel and I have no emotional attachment to it.

I realised that my body naturally likes intermittent fasting.
I found I was forcing myself to eat a lot (to be inline with how everyone else eats) and that is extremely uncomfortable and left me sluggish throughout the days I did it.

I always preferred eating in the evenings.

I'd get home around 5 and really make myself eat. Set reminders because I could just get distracted doing things at home. And discovered I could fit all my calories in, between the hours on 5pm and 10pm..which is what I had basically been doing for years when people said I ''shouldn't eat in the evening ''. I've always had bags of energy.

Do what's right for you op. Some people just can't function/dislike the feeling of being constantly full or fed.
Once you're healthy that's all that matters.

I often feel this way when I'm stressed or busy but I just force myself to eat even if I'm not hungry .