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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

should I say something about this

16 replies

mrsrichardsglasses · 21/07/2021 07:39

DD's school have posted a video of an activity her class did. In the video you can see quite clearly DD being pushed and roughly grabbed by another child, hard enough that she steps back when pushed and after being grabbed is holding her arm (she said it hurt a lot).
I'm a bit annoyed that they didn't stop and re-recored the activity and make the other child sit out- its only two minutes long, and not many children in it so it's really noticeable. Poor DD tries to carry on but you can see she's upset.
She has said afterwards the child was told off, but would you mention it to the teacher, even in a casual "that's a shame" sort of way?
For context they are in Year 1.

YABU- no I wouldn't say anything
YANBU- yes I would

OP posts:

mashawithbear · 21/07/2021 07:46

💯 I would. That's awful!! They are stupid for thinking it's ok to put that video up

ItPearl · 21/07/2021 07:48

Well everybody has witnessed it. So they cant deny it happened

Whinge · 21/07/2021 07:48

Was this the first you knew about your DD being hurt? If so I would call the school to discuss what happened and why you weren't informed.

I'm also surprised they posted a video which shows them in a negative way, usually these videos are to try and promote the school. To show off how lovely it is and how much fun the children are having. I wouldn't be happy with the video being public when it shows your child being assulted rather than engaing in the activity.

tallduckandhandsome · 21/07/2021 07:48

Absolutely raise it.

Original poster

mrsrichardsglasses · 21/07/2021 07:59

@Whinge

Was this the first you knew about your DD being hurt? If so I would call the school to discuss what happened and why you weren't informed.

Yes, she didn't say anything when she got home. I watched the video online and then just said to her "I saw the video of (activity), it looked fun! How did you find it?" And the first thing she said was "X really hurt me so the teacher told him off after the video."

I will clarify it's not pushing hard enough for her to fall over, but she does recoil. And she doesn't cry but you can see on her face she's hurt.
I know as her mum I might be more aware of it than another parent who's just watching their child but the child who hurt her is obviously messing about as well so it is very noticeable.

OP posts:

Whinge · 21/07/2021 08:03

So no one from school informed you of the incident and injury, there was no note, no call? Then they posted a video of your child being assulted by another child. Wow i'm not usually one to complain but I would be calling the school this morning to discuss what happened, why you weren't informed and why they think it's ok to share a video of your child being hurt by another pupil.

picklemewalnuts · 21/07/2021 08:06

They dealt with the incident there and then, and posted a 'real' video rather than a sanitised one. I think that's ok.

NothingEverChangesButTheShoes · 21/07/2021 08:13

Comment on the video and especially if it is on facebook. I understand they have 'dealt' with it, but by yr 1 children know not to shove and hurt others.

Original poster

mrsrichardsglasses · 21/07/2021 08:17

@picklemewalnuts

They dealt with the incident there and then, and posted a 'real' video rather than a sanitised one. I think that's ok.

I agree to an extent and I don't want to come across as a helicopter parent. I just feel really sad that the video we have of DD doing this lovely activity is of her being hurt and looking upset. Especially as obviously this year the opportunities for them to do nice activities have been few and far between.

OP posts:

Blueskytoday06 · 21/07/2021 08:23

Hopefully the child's parents will see and appropriately punish them.

KarmaStar · 21/07/2021 09:41

If every time a child pushed another the school were expected to ring the parents ,neither the school staff not parents would get much else done.it's been dealt with,move on.

Cherrychocchip · 21/07/2021 13:04

I would be really pissed off too. Yes definitely say something. Sounds to me like they didn't notice until they had posted the video. How embarrassing for them too.
I guess in years to come you will find it funny. But totally get why you don't now. I'm sure your dd will forget about it very soon and that's the main thing.

GreyhoundG1rl · 21/07/2021 13:07

It's odd that they chose this particular sequence to post online, but the child has been dealt with. It's not a reportable "injury".

Original poster

mrsrichardsglasses · 21/07/2021 16:20

@Cherrychocchip

I would be really pissed off too. Yes definitely say something. Sounds to me like they didn't notice until they had posted the video. How embarrassing for them too. I guess in years to come you will find it funny. But totally get why you don't now. I'm sure your dd will forget about it very soon and that's the main thing.

Thank you, I hope so!

OP posts:

Original poster

mrsrichardsglasses · 21/07/2021 16:21

@GreyhoundG1rl

It's odd that they chose this particular sequence to post online, but the child has been dealt with. It's not a reportable "injury".

Yes I agree, it definitely wasn't serious enough that I would expect a call or a form. She didn't have any bruises or marks.

OP posts:

KatherineOfGaunt · 21/07/2021 16:27

I wouldn't necessarily inform parents of a child being pushed. However, I think posting a video on social media that includes a child being rough with another child is unfair on your DD and doesn't put the school in a good light.

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